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Gotta admit, I am not as psyched for this show as I was for the last two PPVs. I hope that leads to a better than expected show.
So, they go live with the People Power battle royal and we hear it but we don't see it. Jerry Lawler and Michael Cole tell us that Christian is in it. We should be excited because a former World Champion makes his televised return in a match for a title that no one cares about, and that is both Cody's and Santinos. Yay. Brilliant. ... It took, literally, ONE MINUTE to heard "trending on Twitter". They are killing me. ... You can tell where you stand in WWE's hierarchy by how fast you are thrown out. If you are tossed early, you may want to look into an alternative career. Just saying. Willie Regal is still in and you aren't? Yeah, rent don't buy. ... Wow, Usey Uso (I can't tell them apart) jumped before he was hit. Nice! They both got eliminated. ... Lawler said he had no idea how many guys were in the match. Yes, he said that. If he doesn't care, why should we? Oh yeah, we don't because it's for a title no one wants (and that includes them both). Final four is Christian, Miz, David Otunga and Tyson Kidd. Two guys have a chance to get that non-coveted title. ... Cole just told us that Christian has an injured shoulder. And he has been out for six months. If it's injured Einstein, why is he back? There is no cure for stupid. There really isn't. ... Kidd gets the boot, literally. Down to three. ... Otunga and Miz are working on Christian. Looks like a face turn is coming for him. ... My wife called Christian tossing Otunga a full minute before he did. I love that woman. She just said she thinks Christian will win. I agree with her obviously. He does. Christian gets a title shot at a belt he doesn't even want! What a freakin' return for him! It was what it was.
We got to see a John Laurin ACE is package. I wish I had to piss but since I didn't I had to watch it. And now we have John Cena doing his side on tape. I am so not looking forward to their match.
Tag Title time. Jack Swagger and Dolph Ziggler get to compete for the (what used to be coveted) WWE Tag Team Titles. You know those guys are so psyched to be in this match. R Truth and Kofi have held these coveted titles for three weeks. They are invested! ... Booker is a moron. King does a bad joke. How many peeping toms has Vickie cured in her lifetime. Booker laughs like a mofo and then says NONE! There is no cure for stupid folks. ... It is 8:23 and my wife is already falling asleep. Not a good sign folks. ... The best part about Booker on commentary is that he says things and I have no idea what he just said, even though I understand all of the words that he used. That has to be some kind of gift right? ... The heels are in charge early. This is boring. It's time to kill the tag team division because, as Eps just said to me, it's dead. They don't get it. ... The match is so dull that Lawler is focused on exploring the deeper recesses of Vickie Guerrero's navel. I can't make this up. ... The heels have dominated the whole way. That means they will lose. Almost on cue, R Truth laid out Swagger and tagged Kofi. Kofi came in got and laid out Ziggler. Got a two count but Swagger made the save. Ziggler uses a double team for two and Truth made the save. Ziggler then hits Trouble In Paradise on Ziggler and the champs retain. ... It was the right finish (though they are killing Ziggler and Swagger by putting them in a spot like this). All four guys worked hard but my problem with it was that I just knew it didn't matter and the announce team did nothing to tell me that it did. This has to change if the third hour of Raw that is coming soon is going to be anything but a failure.
Eve and Legal Eagle Otunga are sending Jo and Broni into the crowd to get anti-Jobby Ace signs. I am so compelled. You know, they haven't overdelivered on my low expectations yet. Just saying. ... 8:36, my wife is asleep.
Time for Beth vs. Layla. Cole says she had the Glamazon nickname in high school. Sure she did Cole. ... Beth is in control, working on what Cole said is the bad knee of Layla. That is the second person on the show who apparently rehabbed an injury and came back too soon. Booker just said that Layla's knee brace means she is not ready to compete. WWE must have the worst doctors in the world. Good think that the wrestlers are independent contractors because if they were employees, they could sue like a mofo. ... After getting dominated the whole way, Layla hit a neckbreaker for the win. It was, well, what it was. ... My wife just woke up, but not due to the show. The phone rang.
Randy Orton and Chris Jericho did a good job on promos pushing the World Title match, which is next. Much like WrestleMania, they need to turn this show around with this match. I hope that they can do it.
Click on Page Two for ongoing thoughts on tonight's show!
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