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Champagne Singh (Canada) vs. Tommy Dreamer (USA) - Hardcore Match
Tommy Dreamer gives a tribute to Sabu by pointing to the sky. Champagne Singh feigns giving a tribute, but flips off Dreamer. Dreamer then grabs him, but Singh gets out of it and gives Dreamer a slap. Singh is sent to the ropes and eats a hip toss. Singh is sent to the ropes again, but holds onto them and rolls to the floor. Dreamer goes to the apron and tries to grab Singh. Singh brings Dreamer down to the floor, but Dreamer is able to grab the control. Dreamer takes a sip of a fan’s drink and spits it into Singh’s face.
Singh shakes it off and punches Dreamer. Singh tries to grab a drink to spit at Dreamer. Singh has to ask twice, but is successful in taking a sip. Dreamer punches the spit out of Singh, though. Dreamer then goes to the back to grab a garbage can full of weapons. Dreamer hits Singh with a baking sheet. Dreamer then grabs, quite possibly, the smallest chainsaw I have ever seen. Dreamer puts it down, though, in favor of some bagged milk. Dreamer throws the bag of milk at Singh.
Dreamer positions two bags of milk on top of each other. Dreamer tries to suplex Singh onto the milk, but Singh counters with a suplex of his own onto the ramp. Singh hits Dreamer with a baking sheet. Singh punches Dreamer and Dreamer rolls into the ring. Singh grabs a chain and wraps it around Dreamer’s face on the apron. Singh then grabs a chair and brings it into the ring. Singh hits Dreamer in the back with the chair. Singh considers doing it a second time, but sits on the chair instead. Singh grabs a sleeper, but Dreamer fights out of it. Dreamer hits the ropes, but Singh drop toe holds Dreamer into the chair for a two count.
Singh hits Dreamer in the back with the chair again. Singh then lays the chair on Dreamer’s front as Dreamer is laid out on the mat. Singh stomps down on the chair. Singh tries to stomp down on the chair again, but Dreamer moves the chair at the last second to hit Singh in the no-no area. Dreamer grabs a hockey stick from underneath the ring and brings it into the squared circle. Singh grabs the chair, but Dreamer knocks it out of his hands with the hockey stick. Dreamer then low blows Singh with the hockey stick.
Dreamer hits some punches and goes for the Bionic Elbow, but Singh blocks it. Singh goes for the punches/elbow move, but Dreamer hits a cutter for a two count. Dreamer goes for a DDT on the chair, but Singh blocks it and hits an STO onto the chair. Singh grabs the trash can from the floor and brings it into the ring. He sets it up between the top and middle turnbuckle in the corner. Singh tries to whip Dreamer into the trash can, but Dreamer reverses it. Singh hits the trash can and then eats a DDT. Dreamer gets a two count.
Dreamer goes to the floor and breaks a bag of milk all over him for energy. Dreamer calls for Tom Schwartz and Jax Taylor (reality stars) to help him slide a table into the ring. Dreamer sets the table up in the corner, but Singh then attacks him. They jockey for position until Dream lifts up Singh. Dreamer hits a Death Valley Driver on Singh through the table for the win!
Winner: Tommy Dreamer
Team USA 3 - Team Canada 2
Frankie Kazarian makes his way to the ring. He wants to explain why he can’t stand Canadians before he wrestles. Kazarian says that Canadians aren’t actually nice people - they are assholes who are unemployed and alcoholics. Kazarian, though, is royalty - he’s the King of TNA. Everyone knows that, but what people don’t know is that this year alone…Kazarian has claimed fifty kingdoms. Tonight, he claims his fifty-first kingdom. Kazarian’s opponent tonight is everything that Frankie said Canadians are before.
Cody Deaner comes out. Deaner wants to know if Kazarian has a problem with Canada. If he has a problem with Canada, then Kazarian has a problem with Cody Deaner. Deaner loves Canada. He loves the Great Lakes, poutine, a double double, maple syrup, and…Americans. Deaner loves everyone. However, there is one American that Deaner does not like. That man is a hoser. That man is Frankie Kazarian. The crowd chants “hoser” at Kazarian. Deaner heard what Kazarian said about having fifty-one kingdoms. How about instead of Kazarian being the king of fifty-one kingdoms, Deaner punches Frankie in the face fifty-one times?
Cody Deaner (Canada) vs. Frankie Kazarian (USA)
Cody Deaner goes for the punching right away, but Frankie Kazarian slips to the floor. Kazarian gets into the ring. Deaner goes for a lock up, but Kazarian kicks him in the gut. Kazarian then punches Deaner in the corner. Deaner shakes it off and sends Kazarian into the corner. Deaner climbs to the second rope and starts his punches. He gets into the teens, but Kazarian is able to escape and then slam Deaner down. Deaner drives Kazarian into the corner and resumes the punching. Deaner gets to thirty-one when Kazarian grabs him and hits an inverted atomic drop.
Deaner is sent to the ropes, but hits a kick when Kazarian ducks down. Kazarian recovers with a slam and a springboard leg drop for a two count. Kazarian punches Deaner in the corner and goes for a splash. Deaner moves out of the way and goes back to punching. Deaner gets into the forties, but Kazarian lifts up Deaner. Deaner slips out, but Kazarian hits a tackle. Kazarian grabs a cravat-like hold, but Deaner fights out of it. Kazarian elbows Deaner to cut him off, but Deaner recovers with back elbows and a back body drop. Deaner goes back to the corner punches and gets to fifty. Deaner goes for a big fifty-first punch, but takes too long for the set up. Kazarian grabs a roll up for the win!
Winner: Frankie Kazarian
After the match, Frankie Kazarian has words for Cody Deaner. Kazarian then turns his back on Deaner and thinks the fans are cheering for him. They are cheering for Deaner, though, who is winding up his fist. Kazarian turns around and eats the fifty-first punch.
Team USA 4 - Team Canada 2
Matt Hardy is shown laid out in the back. Matthew Rehwoldt blames Team Canada.
The Northern Armory (Canada) vs. Brian Myers and Eddie Edwards with Alisha Edwards (USA)
Before the match starts, Alisha Edwards wants to know if Niagara Falls wants to know something. She can’t understand anything that Canadians say with their stupid accents. Eddie Edwards says that it’s depressing every time The System is forced to go to Canada. He talks down to the Canadian crowd and says that they can never compete with the USA - the United System of America. Brian Myers says that he’s been stuck in Canada for four days when he could be home with his family celebrating an American holiday while drinking American beer. Instead, he’s stuck wrestling two talentless, unknown losers.
Travis Williams grabs the microphone and wants to know if The System wants to know something. The Northern Armory is sick of The System bashing Canada. The Northern Armory and Canada have their elbows up and they are going to use them to break The System.
The System goes on the attack of The Northern Armory and the bell rings. Travis Williams and Judas Icarus shake it off and send Brian Myers and Eddie Edwards to the apron. Myers and Edwards are tied up in the ropes and eat some chops. Williams gets a two count on Myers. Williams hits a dropkick on Myers for a two count. Williams then cranks Myers’ arm, but Myers fights out of it.
Myers brings Williams over to Edwards. Edwards cranks down on Williams’ arm as the referee is distracted. Myers works over Williams’ arm and then brings it over to Edwards. Myers distracts the referee as Edwards cranks Williams’ arm. Myers goes for it again, but it backfires. Williams does the switcheroo and Edwards cranks on Myers’ arm. As Edwards is doing so, The Northern Armory goes to the floor in front of Edwards to make it clear what he’s doing. They then pull Edwards off of the apron and do the same to Myers. Williams and Icarus hit a double dive through the ropes onto The System.
Williams rolls Myers back into the ring and chops him in the corner. He chops him again and then goes for a third, but Alisha Edwards gets into the ring to block it. Eddie Edwards comes in to help, but is disposed of. That allows Myers to tackle down Williams, though. Myers works Williams over in the ropes and then distracts the referee, allowing Alisha to attack Williams. Myers then slaps on a chinlock, which Williams works out of. Williams hits a handspring clothesline and tags in Icarus. Edwards tags in, as well.
Icarus comes in hot. He tackles down Edwards twice and then hits him with a knee. Icarus hits a flurry of strikes and a flying forearm. Icarus hits a leaping back elbow and then climbs to the second rope. Icarus hits a flying back elbow for a two count. Edwards counters with a chop. Myers comes in and disposes of Williams. Icarus tries to fight off the double team, but Myers hits a spear. Edwards gets a two count.
The System hits a double slam on Williams. Icarus blocks a running attack on Edwards, but Eddie recovers and The System hits System Overload for a two count. Edwards lifts Icarus up again for System Overload, but Williams cuts Myers off. Icarus rolls Edwards up for the win!
Winners: The Northern Armory
After the match, Eddie Edwards starts raining down punches on Judas Icarus. Travis Williams tries to stop him, but Brian Myers low blows him. The System continues to beat up The Northern Armory until Eric Young comes out with a chair to run off The System.
Team USA 4 - Team Canada 3
Page 3!
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