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SMACKDOWN REPORT
by Buck Woodward
Smackdown for January 29th kicked off with the show opening, then cut to the crowd in Washington, D.C.
General Manager Paul Heyman was in the ring, but was immediately interrupted by Vince McMahon. Vince said that tonight was supposed to be a night of celebration for Royal Rumble Winner Chris Benoit, but that wasn't going to happen, since he jumped to Raw. Vince took Heyman to task for letting Steve Austin sign away Chris Benoit, using the loophole that the Rumble winner gets to decide which champion he faces. McMahon said Benoit left Smackdown because of Heyman, and wanted an explanation and apology for the Smackdown audience. Heyman said "Screw Chris Benoit!" and said that he was only doing the same thing that Vince McMahon would do. Heyman talked about how Vince McMahon reacted when Scott Hall, Kevin Nash, Hulk Hogan and Bret Hart left, and said he was following in his footsteps. Heyman said Vince always just gave someone else a chance when a star left, and Heyman said he was doing the same thing. Heyman said he was going to have a 15-man Royal Rumble to determine the challenger to WWE Champion Brock Lesnar at No Way Out. Heyman explained that Matt Morgan was injured, so Hardcore Holly was taking his place. Chris Benoit was being replaced by Eddie Guerrero, and everyone else would be the Smackdown wrestlers that were in Sunday's Rumble. Heyman told McMahon they could make "network history" tonight by have a Royal Rumble on Smackdown. McMahon agreed, and walked off.
Members of the U.S. Military were shown in the crowd.
WWE Tag Team Champions Doug & Danny Basham, with Shaniqua, vs. Paul London & Billy Kidman. Kidman and London went to work early, working over Doug Basham as a team. The referee got bumped slightly, and missed Danny pulling the ropes open so London would fall to the floor. The Bashams then did an illegal switch. The Bashams then worked over London, focusing on his lower back. Doug used a surfboard on London, and Danny used a similar move when he tagged in. London escaped with a mule kick, and made the hot tag to Kidman. Kidman cleaned house on both Bashams, hitting a enzugiri on Doug and a dropkick on Danny. Kidman hit a spinebuster on Doug and went to the top rope, but Danny tripped him as Shaniqua distracted the referee and took London off the apron. Danny, making an illegal switch again, DDT'd Kidman off the ropes and got the pin at the 3:45 mark. Winners: Doug & Danny Basham.
Kurt Angle was in the back, with Dawn Marie and Paul Heyman. Dawn rolled a tumbler of numbered balls, and Angle said he was dedicating his win tonight to the men and women of the Armed Forces. Angle was confident, then took off in a hurry when he saw which number he had picked.
Chavo Guerrero Jr., his face bandaged and bruised, was being looked at by a trainer. Chavo Sr. was there, saying that he couldn't believe was Eddie had done to his nephew. Chavo said his bruises and scrapes would heel, but the scars in his heart would be there forever. Chavo said he would get revenge on his uncle, and that everyone would know who the biggest star is in the Guerrero family.
Eddie Guerrero picked out his ball for the Rumble, after having Dawn blow on it for good luck. Rey Mysterio and Jorge Paez, "The Clown Prince Of Boxing" came in. They exchanged pleasantries, with Eddie saying they were bringing him luck tonight. Rey left to go defend his Cruiserweight title.
Footage was shown of John Cena injuring his knee at the Royal Rumble. Cena picked his number for tonight, after Paul Heyman informed him that Dawn Marie could not pick the ball for him. Rhyno entered the room, and told Cena it would be a shame if someone took out his knee and finished him for good. Cena told Rhyno that he stunk, and Heyman should give him some soap.
Cruiserweight Champion Rey Mysterio Jr. vs. Jamie Noble, with Nidia. They showed how Nidia cost Noble his match with Mysterio at the Rumble PPV. They exchanged holds on the mat, with neither getting much of an advantage. Noble hit a Northern Lights suplex out of a test of strength for two, but Mysterio came back with a headscissors. Noble put Mysterio in a torture rack, but Mysterio escaped with an armdrag. Mysterio tripped Noble into the ropes and set for the 619, but Noble got up and elbowed him. Noble went into the ropes, but Nidia tripped him, allowing Rey to grab a springboard rana for two. Noble took back over with a knee to the gut, and hit an over the knee backbreaker for two. Noble applied an abdominal stretch on the mat, but Rey escaped. They exchanged rollups, then Noble rammed Mysterio into a corner. Noble, from the floor, pulled Rey's back across the ringpost. Noble missed a charge in the corner, and Rey went to the top rope, but Noble met him there. Noble hit a top rope superplex, and Noble slowly rolled onto Mysterio for a two count. Rey booted a charging Noble and hit a second rope bulldog for two. Mysterio kicked Noble, and hit a Code Red (sunset flip into sitdown powerbomb) for two. Noble tried for a Tiger Driver, but Mysterio escaped and sent Noble into the ropes. Mysterio hit the 619. Rey went for the West Coast Pop, but ended up leapfrogging Noble. Rey grabbed Noble in a waistlock, but Noble lunged forward and Rey went through the ropes and to the floor. Noble went to the top rope, but blind Nidia was standing in the way of his planned dive. Noble got off the ropes and shoved Nidia into the ring. Noble yelled at her, then went to shove her into Mysterio, but she stopped short. Noble charged, and Rey, who was on the apron, shoulderblocked Noble. Mysterio then hit a springboard senton on Noble for the pin in 7:38. Winner: Rey Mysterio.
Post-match, Nidia took off her glasses, revealing she wasn't blind and threw them at Noble, then walked off.
Rue DeBona did a segment about how Playboy was looking for a pair of Divas for an upcoming issue. Rue went over how the Sable, Chyna and Torrie Wilson pictorials were huge successes.
Big Show went to pick out his ball, but his hand couldn't fit in the hole on the tumbler. Dawn Marie picked out the ball for him, and there were a few innuendos about his big hands and Dawn picking his ball. Show was confident he would win the Rumble.
Josh Matthews interviewed Brock Lesnar about his attack on Bill Goldberg at the Royal Rumble, and they showed Goldberg's comments on Raw about Lesnar being "next". Lesnar talked about how when he started, people said he was a "Goldberg-wannbe". Lesnar said he was the youngest WWE champion ever, and that he headlined Wrestlemania, something Goldberg has never done. Lesnar said Goldberg was the one that wanted to be like him. Lesnar talked about how he wasn't afraid of anyone, and that he would prove it by going to the ring and putting out an open challenge for a non-title match.
Shelton Benjamin and Charlie Haas picked out their numbers for the Rumble. They were interrupted by a Production Assistant (Jesse of Tough Enough fame), who told Paul Heyman that Eddie Guerrero had been attacked. Heyman followed her to a bathroom, where medics were checking on Guerrero. Chavo Jr. and Sr. walked in and asked what was going on. Mysterio, assuming they had attacked Eddie, jumped them, but was pulled off by officials. One of the medics said Eddie had to be taken to the hospital, as he was unconscious. After a break, we saw that they loaded Eddie into a ambulance and took him away.
WWE Champion Brock Lesnar vs. Orlando Jordan, non-title match. Lesnar attacked Orlando as he got into the ring and just mauled him, tossing him out to the floor. Jordan got back in and knocked Brock out of the ring from behind, as Brock was playing to the fans. Brock took his time getting back into the ring. Jordan got a two count with a sunset flip, but Brock rammed him into a corner with shoulderblocks. Jordan elbowed a charging Lesnar, but Brock came right back with a powerslam, then applied a crossface/bodyscissors combo. Jordan elbowed out, and booted a charging Lesnar. Jordan started kicked at Lesnar's legs, then hit a flying forearm and a pair of dropkicks for a two count. Jordan ran into a Brock clothesline, and Lesnar applied the Brock Lock for the win in 4:22. Winner: Brock Lesnar.
A vignette of Rey Mysterio, Matt Morgan, Dawn Marie and Shaniqua visiting injured soldiers at Walter Reed Army Medical Center was shown.
They showed a clip of how Undertaker's music distracted Kane this past week at the Royal Rumble and Raw. Josh Matthews interviewed Vince McMahon about whether the Undertaker was behind these instances. McMahon said he couldn't communicate with the dead, and that last time he saw Undertaker, he was burying him alive. Josh asked McMahon who he thought would win the Rumble, and McMahon said he wasn't going to tell him, since that should have been his first question. McMahon did say Josh had a nice smile though.
Kurt Angle burst into Paul Heyman's office, complaining about Eddie Guerrero being taken out. Angle said Heyman was a snake for putting Chavo Guerrero in his place. Heyman said he didn't know where Angle got that information, because it was wrong. Heyman said Eddie had regained consciousness, and if he got back to the arena in time for his entrance into the Rumble, he would participate. If not, there would be no replacement, and Angle should be happy, since it was one less person to deal with.
The 15 Man-Royal Rumble began, with 90 second intervals between participants:
Kurt Angle was number one.
Rhyno was number two.
Rhyno went on the offensive first, but Angle returned fire with punches. Rhyno hit the gore on Angle, and tried to pull Angle towards the ropes. Rhyno stomped him in a corner, then got him against the ropes. Rhyno missed a punch, and Angle hit an Angle Slam.
Charlie Haas was number three.
Haas went right after Angle, choking him with his boot. Haas then went and stomped on Rhyno, before dropkicking Angle. Rhyno hit Haas from behind and tried to push him over the ropes. Haas tried to push Angle over the top, but Angle landed on the apron.
Shelton Benjamin was number four.
Benjamin suplexed Angle as soon as he got into the ring. Benjamin whipped Rhyno to Haas, who hit a hot shot on him. Angle gave Haas, then Benjamin, German suplexes. Angle hit Benjamin with a vertical suplex, but Haas powerslammed Angle.
Bradshaw was number five.
Bradshaw hit Haas with a clothesline, but missed Rhyno with one. Rhyno missed a charge in the corner, and Bradshaw hit him with the Clothesline From Hell. Bradshaw hit Shelton Benjamin with a boot to the face, as they went to commercial.
Ernest Miller was number six.
Miller hit the ring and danced while decking everyone, but was easily eliminated by Kurt Angle when he started focusing more on his dancing. They showed that this had happened during the break.
Ernest Miller was eliminated.
Yoshihiro Tajiri was number seven.
Billy Gunn was number eight.
Gunn hit a Fameasser on Bradshaw, and tossed Benjamin and Haas over the top, but both held on. Tajiri hit a handspring elbow on Haas. Angle put Benjamin in an ankle lock, but Gunn broke it up. Bradshaw slammed Tajiri.
The Big Show was number nine.
Everyone stopped fighting and attacked the Big Show as he entered the ring, but Show shoved them all away and started decking everyone. Tajiri tried to fire off a kick, but Show lifted him by the throat and tossed him over the top and to the floor.
Yoshihiro Tajiri was eliminated.
Bradshaw hit Show with a bit boot, then charged him, but Show backdropped him over the top.
Bradshaw was eliminated.
John Cena was number ten.
Cena had a brace on his right knee. Show stared down Cena as he came in. They went face to face, and Cena ducked a punch. Cena worked over Show near the ropes, and knocked him over the top rope, but Show landed on the apron as they went to commercial.
A-Train and Nunzio were number eleven and twelve, and came in during the commercial.
Nunzio was tossed over the top rope by John Cena during the commercial.
Nunzio was eliminated. Apparently, Rhyno was eliminated during the commercial as well, but they never showed how it happened, or told us who tossed him out.
Eddie Guerrero was number thirteen.
Guerrero was attacked by A-Train, but Guerrero backdropped him to the floor.
A-Train is eliminated.
Big Show pulled Guerrero onto his shoulders, but Guerrero floated off. Show hit him with a headbutt. Benjamin and Haas worked over Angle.
Rikishi was number fourteen.
Show choked Cena in a corner. Rikishi knocked Billy Gunn over the top with a superkick, but Gunn held on. Rikishi kicked Show down in a corner and gave him the Stinkface. Rikishi then gave one to Benjamin as well, then Billy Gunn got one too.
Hardcore Holly was number fifteen.
Big Show chokeslammed Rikishi. Holly went after Gunn, then Angle. Cena went to FU Show, but Show blocked it and choked Cena over the top rope and to the apron. Show kicked Cena off the apron to eliminate him.
John Cena was eliminated.
Show had one leg over the top rope to kick Cena, so several wrestlers ganged up (including Cena on the floor) to knock Show over the top and to the floor.
Big Show was eliminated.
Haas wored over Angle in a corner. Rikishi tried to get Benjamin over the top, but he held on. They showed replays of the earlier eliminations. Rikishi hit a reverse splash in the corner on Guerrero. Angle shoved Gunn over the top rope, but he held on. Guerrero went for a rana on Haas, which Haas blocked, but Guerrero still managed to throw Haas over the top.
Charlie Haas was eliminated.
Angle ducked a Benjamin punched and clotheslined him to the floor.
Shelton Benjamin was eliminated.
Kurt Angle hit an Angle Slam on Rikishi, and Guerrero followed up with a frog splash. Holly was trying to eliminated Billy Gunn, and Angle ran up behind him and tossed him to the floor.
Hardcore Holly was eliminated.
The final four were Billy Gunn, Eddie Guerrero, Kurt Angle and Rikishi. Guerrero went for a monkey flip on Gunn, but Gunn blocked it and went to dump Guerrero. Guerrero turned it into a bodyscissors, flipping him to the floor, but landing on the apron himself.
Billy Gunn was eliminated.
Rikishi superkicked Angle and chokeslammed Guerrero after they tried to team up on him. Rikishi went for a Banzai Drop on Angle, but he moved out of the way. Guerrero tried to put Rikishi over the top rope, but Rikishi elbowed him away. Angle ran up behind Rikishi, but was elbowed away as well. Guerrero and Angle then tried together and tossed Rikishi to the floor.
Rikishi was eliminated.
Guerrero and Angle stared each other down. Angle grabbed a waistlock takedown, but Guerrero elbowed him away. Guerrero went to backdrop Angle out, but Angle landed on the apron. They traded right hands, with Angle getting the better of it. Angle hit a pair of German suplexes, then tried to suplex him from the ring, but Guerrero held on to the ropes. Angle tried to kick him off the apron, but Guerrero grabbed his leg in an ankle lock and reentered the ring, but Angle reversed into an ankle lock of his own. Angle took Guerrero to the ropes, and they flipped over, but both men held on to the ropes. Guerrero had one foot come close to touching, but pulled himself back in. Guerrero hit a back elbow and a trip of vertical suplexes. Guerrero, wobbly, went to the top rope, but Angle ran up the ropes. They battled on the top rope, and both men fell and crotched themselves on the top. Again, both men held onto the ropes to avoid elimination. They traded blows, then Angle applied a sleeper. Guerrero slumped to the mat, and Angle maintained the hold. With Guerrero down, Angle switched to a rear chinlock. Guerrero fought his way back up, and elbowed him in the midsection a few times. Guerrero charged forward, and flipped Angle over the top rope and to the apron. Eddie hit some right hands, but Angle held on. Angle shoulderblocked Guerrero through the ropes, and grabbed Guerrero for a vertical suplex from the apron. Eddie swung his legs back down, and lifted Angle into a vertical suplex. However, instead of falling back, Guerrero tossed Angle forward, over the top rope and to the floor. Royal Rumble Winner: Eddie Guerrero.
Eddie Guerrero, who will get a title shot against Brock Lesnar at No Way Out, celebrated to end the show.
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