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They officially announced Summerslam for Sunday 8/23. It will be at the PC, as we've reported.
We are off to the Swamp.
SWAMP FIGHT: WWE Universal Champion Braun Strowman vs. Bray Wyatt (Non-title)
Braun pulls up in a car. Bray is socially distancing from the world, rocking in a chair. Strowman said he was home. The lights went out and Bray disappeared. Braun smashes the chair.
Braun sees some B-roll boars and vultures. Someone attacked Braun. Bray in the Firefly Funhouse, cheered him on like a cheerleader. Braun laid out the nondescript underling and asked Bray to show himself. Someone nailed him from behind and knocked him over. It was the original Braun Strowman character from the Wyatt Family, wielding a shovel. The old Braun nailed current Braun with an axe.
The end.
No wait, he wakes up wrapped in steel chains. I can't believe I am writing this.
Bray arrived in his original persona and theme music, holding a lantern. Braun tries to free himself but can't. Bray welcomes him home and asked him if he likes what Bray did with the place. He told Braun that he can't hurt him, he's already dead. He told Braun he was watching him and he was proud. He said the people really love him and that gets his heart pumping. The success is temporary. It is borrowed. When the 15 minutes is up, who will have his back? What will the people think of him?
Bray screamed he is not Braun's enemy. He said the human race is an infection. They invade and destroy. That's all they know. He said Braun was special, like him. Together, they can be like Gods and rule this place. People will bow to them. As societies crumble and governments fall, they will rule instead. Wyatt said he's got his wings back and he's not going back. He said that Braun is the weapon and he's got the head. He said that he knows what he's supposed to be. I hope so, because this is WCW Yeti bad so far.
Braun says he won't go back to doing Bray's bidding. Bray asked him if he wanted to see something really scary. Someone brought a boa constrictor to Braun. The snake bit Braun, who screamed. Braun woke up at a bonfire and began beating different lackeys up. One of them landed in the fire and went up, running around on flames as our hero, Braun, LAUGHED AT HIM.
A woman's voice said that Braun didn't need to do this. She called for him to come up. Was it SISTER ABIGAIL? NO, it's Alexa Bliss! She kept telling him to follow her home. Run to the light Carol-Ann!
Bray attacked Braun but was hit with a Uranage onto a boat. Was that Skarsgard? Has it jumped ship from the Hardy compound? The boat sailed off into the swamp. Braun went to walk off but tuened around the boat was coming back from another direction. Braun was confused. The boat was empty as well. Braun waded into the water. Bray came from behind and attacked Braun, then tried to force him under the water, I guess to drown him? Braun went limp and the water went still but he finally SHOT UP trying to catch his breath. No Bray to be found.
Braun pulled himself up on the dock. Bray appeared and tried to beat him with an oar. I really should have started drinking before this. He beat Braun over and over with all sorts of cinematic license and flashes of different imagery. He was going to finish off Braun but was kicked through the rotting wood into the water and disappeared again.
Braun said it was over and the show went off the air.
That was it?
No, it wasn't! Bray jumped out of the water like a jump scare in a horror movie and used the Mandible Claw to drag Braun down into the water. He tried to break free of the water but was pulled in.
The water turned blood red and The Fiend emerged from the water. We closed in on him as the show officially went off the air with The Fiend saying "Let me in."
UM, YEP.
That was the end.
It wasn't even a match. It was WWE's version of a B-horror movie, nothing more.
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