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WWE OLD SCHOOL RAW REPORT: LEGENDS RETURN . . . WITH A FEW SURPRISES; REIGNS VERSUS PUNK; PIPER'S PIT; THE SANDOW/KHALI FEUD CONTINUES; AND MORE

By Richard Trionfo on 2014-01-06 23:03:57
We are back and Michael Cole tells us about why Jerry Lawler is not doing commentary with them. He had a stomach virus and is in the back recuperating.

We take a look at highlights from the opening six man tag match and the problems among the members of the Wyatt Family since Luke Harper got pinned.

Daniel Bryan says that he wanted to join this family to learn and be transformed. He wanted to go from being a man to a monster. He can learn, but he can teach. He has been a tag team champion. He was champion with Kane, a man as big as either of them. He wants to team with one of them.

Bray says that will not be necessary because Daniel will be teaming with him.

Match Number Four: Jack Swagger and Antonio Cesaro (with Zeb Colter) versus Goldust and Cody Rhodes in a Non Title Match

Swagger and Goldust start things off and Goldust with a side head lock and shoulder tackle. Goldust gasps in Swagger’s face and then he hits a reverse atomic drop. Cesaro tags in and Goldust with a reverse atomic drop. Cody tags in and they hit a double gourdbuster and Cody gets a near fall. Cody with a hammer lock and Cesaro with an elbow.

Cody is sent over the top rope but he skins the cat and he gives Cesaro a clothesline and gets a near fall. Goldust tags in and he punches Cesaro and Goldust with a snap mare and forearm for a near fall. Swagger tags in and he punches Goldust.

Cesaro with a punch when the referee was not looking. Cesaro tags in and he gets a near fall. Cesaro with a reverse chin lock. Cesaro sends Goldust into the turnbuckles and he tags in Swagger who gets a near fall. Cesaro tags in and he chokes Goldust. Cesaro with an Irish whip but Goldust with a boot. Goldust with a rana from the turnbuckles and Cody tags in.

Cody with a springboard drop kick and he gets a near fall. Cesaro with an Irish whip but Cody floats over and gets a near fall with a sunset flip. Cody kicks Swagger to the floor but Cesaro with a European uppercut and Cody goes to the floor as we go to commercial.

We are back and Swagger with a waist lock on Cody and he turns it into a bear hug. We see footage of the Giant Swing on Cody during the commercial break. Swagger with a slam and then he hits the double jump Swagger Bomb and Cesaro with a leap frog double stomp for a near fall. Swagger tags back in and applies a front face lock.

Cesaro tags back in and Cody with a kick to Swagger and Cesaro is sent to the floor. Goldust is kicked off the apron and Cody tries to make the tag. Cesaro with an uppercut to the back and then he gets a near fall with a rollup. Cesaro with an Irish whip but he misses a charge into the corner. Swagger counters Beautiful Disaster with an ankle lock and Cody tries to escape but Swagger locks it in.

Cody almost gets to the ropes but Swagger pulls him into the center of the ring. Goldust with a kick to Swagger to get him to release the hold. Goldust tags in and he clotheslines Swagger and then he hits a drop down uppercut followed by a spinebuster. Goldust with a double cross body and power slam on Swagger for a near fall. Goldust sends Cesaro to the floor and Swagger gets a near fall with a rollup. Goldust with the Final Cut for the three count.

Winners: Cody Rhodes and Goldust

Diamond Dallas Page is in the back and he is doing some Yoga. Booker T enters and Page says that he is getting ready in case someone needs him in the ring. Page gives a plug for his Yoga and he tells Booker that he will be doing his spinaroonie better than ever.

Booker says that he has his own yoga program.

Ron Simmons stops by for a DAMN moment.

We go to commercial.

Match Number Five: Great Khali (with Ranjin Singh) versus Damien Sandow in an Old School Rematch with Guest Referee Sergeant Slaughter

Sandow with a punch and then he backs into the corner. Khali with kicks in the corner and then he chops Sandow in the corner. Khali with another chop in the opposite corner. Khali sets for the Khali chop but Sandow backs into the corner.

Sandow with an elbow and punches followed by kicks. Sandow argues with Slaughter but he returns to the attack. Khali pushes Sandow away and then he kicks Sandow. Khali with clotheslines and then he waits for the Khali chop and he connects. Sandow has his foot on the rope but Slaughter still makes the three count.

Winner: Great Khali

After the match, Sandow tells Slaughter that his foot was on the rope. Slaughter will hear none of that. Sandow pushes Slaughter and Slaughter pushes back and he applies the Cobra Clutch and Sandow is out.

Brock Lesnar walks in the back with Paul Heyman as we go to commercial.

We are back and Michael Cole reminds us about Jerry Lawler’s stomach virus.

Brock Lesnar’s music plays and he makes his way to the ring with Paul Heyman.

Paul introduces himself and he says that he stands before you as the advocate for the self proclaimed Number One Contender for the WWE World Championship, Brock Lesnar. Paul says that his client wants to convey his dismay over the public’s misconception about the term ‘Old School’.

Old School according to his client is not trudging out ‘legends’ and giving them their last hurrah. That is not old school. According to his client, ‘Old School’ is when one man reigns supreme and every single solitary member of that locker room comes out and challenges that one man, that one champion to be the man in sports entertainment today.

Back in the day, Bruno Sammartino reigned supreme and every single solitary member of the locker room wanted a piece of Bruno. Back in the day, Hulk Hogan reigned supreme and every single member of that locker room wanted a piece of Hogan to be that man. Back in the day, Steve Austin. Paul says that he is not out here to get the acceptance of the people by mentioning these people. The people wanted a piece of Austin.

One man reigns supreme. One man is the WWE World Champion. After the Royal Rumble, whether that man is John Cena or Randy Orton, you better put an expiration stamp on the back of their neck because their time will be short. That man will have a target on their back and the man coming after them will be the Beast Incarnate . . . BROCK LESNAR

This is where the facts are more interesting than the hype. There is nobody in WWE, Mixed Marital Arts, or sports to reign supreme as the number one man. Last week, the World’s Strongest Man took Brock up on his challenge. Brock had no warning or advance notice of this challenge and he laid Mark Henry to waste and gave him the most severe beating of his career.

It did not matter who came down that aisle. Whoever comes up that aisle will end up being a loser.

Paul says that his client, Brock Lesnar’s, life is like a t-shirt. Eat . . . Sleep . . . Conquer . . . Repeat.

Mark Henry’s music interrupts Paul repeating what is on Brock’s t-shirt and he walks to the ring but he holds his ribs.

Mark with punches to Brock but Brock with knees to the ribs and he applies the Kimura. Brock rips off the shirt to reveal the taped arm and Brock lets out a scream.

Brock makes his way up the ramp, but Big Show’s music plays and he comes out.

Brock backs to the ring and he wants a piece of Show.

Show stares at Lesnar and he gets onto the apron. Show enters the ring and Lesnar goes to the floor. Heyman gets on the apron to try to distract Show but it does not work and Show biels Lesnar across the ring.

We take a look back at what happened at the start of Raw with Randy Orton, Ric Flair, and John Cena.

We go to commercial.

We are back and in case you missed it, Mark Henry had his elbow dislocated and fractured by Brock Lesnar.

Match Number Six: Nikki Bella and Brie Bella versus Alicia Fox and Aksana

Nikki and Alicia start things off and Nikki with an arm drag. Nikki with an arm drag. Alicia with a head scissors but Nikki escapes. Nikki with more snap mares and then she hits a monkey flip. Alicia sends Nikki to the floor and she holds her leg.

Nikki slaps Alicia in the face. Alicia with a kick to the injured leg and she gets a near fall. Nikki with a front face lock but Alicia puts Nikki in the ropes and she tags in Aksana. Aksana works on the leg in the ropes. Aksana kicks Nikki in the ropes. Aksana with knees to Nikki’s head and then she kicks Nikki in the hamstring. Aksana with an elbow drop to the leg.

Nikki with a knee to the back. Nikki kicks Aksana away and Brie tags in and she clotheslines Aksana and connects with a drop kick. Brie with a knee and a running knee against the ropes. Aksana kicks Brie in the midsection and Aksana knocks Nikki off the apron. Aksana with an Irish whip but Brie with an elbow.

Brie goes to the turnbuckles and misses a missile drop kick and Aksana gets the three count.

Winners: Aksana and Alicia Fox

Too Cool walk in the back and we go to commercial.

We go to the Goldman Box and Slater says that it feels good to be reunited. They are the same 3MB but much better. Slater says their winning streak starts tonight.

Match Number Seven: Scotty 2 Hotty, Rikishi, and Brian Christopher versus Heath Slater, Jinder Mahal, and Drew McIntyre

Christopher and Mahal start things off and they lock up. Mahal with knees in the corner followed by an Irish whip. Brian with a kick and missile drop kick. Brian with a bulldog. Scotty tags in and they hit a double kick and then they send Jinder to the mat and they hit a double elbow drop and they do a double kip up.

Drew tags in and Mahal with shoulders in the corner. Drew with punches and forearms. Drew with an Irish whip but he misses a splash into the corner. Scotty with a bulldog and Scotty looks around for the W-O-R-M.

Drew with a flying boot to the head and Drew sends Scotty into the corner. Jinder tags in and Jinder with a punch and Drew with a kick. Jinder with a kick and he gets a near fall. Mahal with a quarter nelson and chin lock. Drew tags in and he connects with a forearm. Drew with a suplex and he gets a near fall. Drew knocks Brian off the turnbuckles but Scotty with a neck breaker and both men are down.

Jinder and Rikishi tag in and Rikishi with punches and then he sends Drew over the top rope. Slater gets in the ring but he goes to the floor. Rikishi with a kick to Mahal for a near fall. McIntyre breaks up the cover. Rikishi with a double clothesline and then Christopher with a leg drop from the turnbuckles to McIntyre and then Rikishi does not go over on a sunset flip and he drops down for the three count.

Winners: Rikishi, Scotty 2 Hotty, and Brian Christopher

After the match, Too Cool dances.

We go to commercial.

We are back and next week The Usos will face Daniel Bryan and Bray Wyatt on Raw.

It is time for the Walk of the Legends as they make their way into the arena. The Godfather leads the way followed by Ric Flair, Ron Simmons, Bob Backlund, Arn Anderson, Sergeant Slaughter, Rikishi, Scotty 2 Hotty, Brian Christopher, Booker T, Nikolai Volkoff, Irwin R. Shyster, Ted DiBiase, Roddy Piper, and Diamond Dallas Page.

The music plays and Wade Barrett rises from the side of the stage. Wade Barrett wants some decorum. What a momentous occasion. All of these legends gathered for Old School Raw. He has some bad news. Flea markets across the US were driven to a frenzy by virtue that none of this lot were able to sign 25 year old autographs or shake hands with the 7 people who know who they are. These pathetic attempts to relive your glory years will be futile. Wade says that he will take great pleasure in forgetting their names as soon as they leave this arena. The WWE Universe will also forget their names too.

We go to commercial.

We are back and Mean Gene Okerlund is introduced. He says that it is great to be back in Baltimore. He says that he has some stories to tell about this city and building. You need to call his hotline.

He brings out The New Age Outlaws.

BG tells Gene not to tell everyone about the story with the farm animals.

They make their way to the ring and they do their Old School introduction. Billy has two words for everyone.

Match Number Eight: Roman Reigns (with Dean Ambrose and Seth Rollins) versus CM Punk (with BG James and Billy Gunn)

They lock up and Reigns sends Punk to the mat. They lock up again and Punk with a side head lock. Punk holds on to the side head lock when Reigns tries to send him off the ropes. Punk with a side head lock take down. Reigns backs Punk into the corner and Punk holds on to the side head lock. Reigns with a shoulder tackle.

We go to commercial.

We are back and Punk drops Reigns across the top rope and he punches Reigns but Reigns sends Punk into the ring post from the apron. We see footage from the break when Reigns gained control of the match. The referee continues his count and Punk gets back into the ring and Punk holds the ropes to prevent a cover.

Reigns punches Punk and he gets a near fall. Reigns with a waist lock but Punk tries to get out of the hold with elbows but Reigns holds on. Punk with elbows and Reigns with a belly-to-belly suplex and he gets a near fall.

Reigns punches Punk and he gets a near fall. Punk gets his boot up but Reigns blocks it. Punk with jawbreaker and he hits a cross body. Punk tries for the running knee into the corner but Reigns catches Punk and applies a bear hug. Reigns with a waist lock but Punk with elbows and forearms.

Reigns with a Samoan drop but Reigns gets a near fall. Reigns waits for Punk to turn around for the Superman punch but Punk moves and Punk with a round kick that staggers Reigns. Punk with more kicks to Reigns followed by a leg lariat. Punk with double sledges followed by a swinging neck breaker for a near fall.

Punk with the running knee into the corner and Reigns goes down and Punk gets a near fall. Punk with another knee into the corner followed by a short arm clothesline for a near fall. Punk signals for the elbow and he goes up top. Reigns stops Punk and sets for a superplex but Punk blocks it. Punk with elbows and head butts that send Reigns to the mat.

Punk looks around and hits the elbow drop but Punk’s ribs prevent him from making the cover. Punk signals that it is time for Reigns to go to sleep. Ambrose gets on the apron and James stops him. Rollins and Ambrose take care of Gunn and James. Punk with a suicide dive onto Rollins on the floor. Punk goes to the apron for the springboard clothesline but Reigns with a Superman punch for a near fall.

Reigns sets for the spear but Punk with a leap frog and Reigns hits the turnbuckles. Punk with a rollup for a near fall. Pun with a round kick to the head and he gets a near fall. Punk gets Reigns on his shoulders and Reigns with elbows. Punk with a knee and Reigns sends Punk towards Ambrose on the apron and Punk knocks Ambrose off the apron. Reigns with a spear for the three count.

Winner: Roman Reigns

Jake Roberts makes his way to the ring and he has a bag with goodies. Punk, James, and Gunn attack the Shield and Rollins and Reigns are sent to the floor. Punk with an airplane spin and Go To Sleep to Ambrose. Jake enters the ring and he lets the snake out of the bag and he puts it on Ambrose.

We go to credits.


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