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WWE Armageddon opened with a video focusing on the main event, with comments from Booker T, Eddie Guerrero and Undertaker promising to end JBL's title reign.
WWE Tag Team Champions Rob Van Dam & Rey Mysterio vs. Kenzo Suzuki & Rene Dupree, with Hiroko.
RVD and Suzuki started off, exchanging hold on the mat. Kenzo hit some shots, but RVD took him down with a spin kick, and RVD tagged in Rey for the 4:20 double leg drop for a two count. Rey hit a springboard bodyblock on Suzuki for another two count. Suzuki reversed a whip into the buckles on Rey and tagged in Dupree. Rene worked over Rey in a corner, whipping him hard into the opposite turnbuckles. Rey dodged a charging Dupree and slid under his legs, but Dupree caught him with a boot to the face. Rey flipped over Dupree on a springboard and used a headscissors to put him in 619 position, but Kenzo hit Rey from the apron to stop him from doing it. Rey flipped over Suzuki and tried to powerbomb him to the floor, but Suzuki held onto the top rope, until RVD kicked him off so Rey could powerbomb him on the floor. Dupree gave Mysterio a baseball slide, but RVD went after him, draped him over the guardrail, and hit a corkscrew legdrop off the apron.
Back in the ring, RVD and Mysterio worked over Dupree until he came back with a standing dropkick on RVD. Dupree went for a tag, but Suzuki was still down on the floor from the powerbomb. RVD catapulted Dupree into a Mysterio springboard senton, which he changed into a clothesline when he overshot Dupree. Suzuki finally recovered and tripped up RVD from the floor, allowing Dupree to hit a clothesline. Suzuki tagged in and hit a clothesline of his own on Van Dam, then put him in a chinlock. RVD broke out and hit a spinkick, and tagged in Mysterio. Rey went to work on Dupree, but as Hiroko distracted the referee, Dupree and Kenzo gave Rey a double team Hot Shot on the top rope into a reverse powerbomb by Dupree. Torrie Wilson ran out and chased Hiroko to the back.
Kenzo delivered a kneedrop to Rey for a two count, then went into an armbar. Rey punched out of it, crawled under Kenzo's legs, and went to tag RVD. Kenzo was late hooking Rey's leg to stop him, so Rey had to slow down his crawl, which looked bad, so Suzuki could stop him. Dupree tagged in and put Rey in a surfboard. Rey kicked out of it, but Dupree gave him a reverse atomic drop and tagged Kenzo back in. Suzuki chopped Mysterio in a corner, then choked him. Rey kicked Kenzo a few times, and Suzuki badly missed a charge, but managed to grab Mysterio in a back suplex for two. Dupree tagged back in, but Rey flipped out of a back suplex attempt. Dupree knocked Van Dam off the apron so he couldn't tag in, then double teamed Rey with Kenzo as RVD tried to run in, but was stopped by the referee.
Kenzo choked Rey against the bottom rope, and clotheslined him for a two count. Rey again had to slow down on his way to the corner so Kenzo could grab him and stop the tag from happening. Dupree and Kenzo did the French Tickler dance, and Dupree dropped a headbutt on Rey for a two count. Dupree whipped Mysterio hard into a corner, but Rey hit a pair of kicks and gave Dupree a rana, sending him into the ringpost. Mysterio tagged Van Dam, who hit a series of kicks on Dupree and a dropkick. RVD slammed Dupree and hit the split legged moonsault for a two count. RVD knocked Suzuki off the apron and gave the Original Rolling Thunder with Rey to Dupree. Suzuki broke up the cover, and all four men started going at it. Suzuki backdropped Rey to the floor. RVD fought his opponents two on one. Suzuki was kicked to the floor, and RVD hit a bodyblock (looked like a botched spot) for a two count. Rey came in and he and RVD set up Dupree and Suzuki for 619's. Rey hit the move, and Dupree fell to the mat as Suzuki was thrown to the floor by RVD. Van Dam then hit Dupree with the five star frog splash, while Mysterio gave Suzuki a pescado. Van Dam got the pin on Dupree at the thirteen minute mark.
Winners: Rob Van Dam & Rey Mysterio.
Buck: Someone want to tell me what the point was of doing a title change on Smackdown if they were just going to have RVD & Mysterio win the rematch too?
Daniel Puder did a somewhat awkward promo for the "Dixie Dogfight" boxing match, promising to destroy Mike Mizanin for talking too much.
Kurt Angle came out, accompanied by armed security to guard his gold medals. Angle said he was going to treat the fans to a special "Kurt Angle Invitational". Angle announced that he was going to take on Santa Claus. Santa came to the ring, tossing out candy canes to the crowd. Angle shook hands with Santa, and made a crack about Tazz being one of his elves. Angle said he didn't like Santa Claus because his daughter never wants to talk about him (Angle), only Santa. Angle said his daughter was watching tonight, and he was going to make Santa tap out. Angle took Santa to the mat (Santa's wig fell off), gave him an Angle Slam, then put him in an ankle lock for the tap out.
Winner: Kurt Angle.
Angle took his medals, and left.
Mike Mizanin did a promo for the boxing match, talking about how everyone is saying he is an underdog for the fight, but that this "dog has some bite".
A video package on the Tough Enough competitions and eliminations was shown.
Al Snow joined the commentators for the next match. Snow said Puder was favored, but that no one should underestimate Mizanin.
General Manager Theodore R. Long came to the ring and said he was there to bring the fans "must see" events. Long put over the Tough Enough competition, saying it started with thousands of entries, and now it was down to two finalists. Long then acted as ring announcer for the boxing match.
Daniel Puder vs. Mike Mizanin, boxing match. This was allegedly a legitimate boxing match (they had a commissioner at ringside, and a boxing referee), scheduled for three rounds, one minute each, with one minute rest periods between rounds. No standing eight count, and no three knockdown rule. The fighters could not be saved by the bell in any round. Both men wore headgear for the fight.
Round One: Both men came out just flinging wild punches at each other. They broke on the ropes, and Puder measured some shots. Mizanin came back with some wild punches again, and Puder slipped on the mat (obviously a slip). Mizanin kept throwing, landing a few, although Puder threw less but hit more.
Round Two: Mizanin charged and flung punches again. Puder hit a shot to the back of the head, and the referee warned him. Mizanin kept trying to run around, throwing punches and running back and forth. Puder hit better shots again, but Miz's headgear definitely helped him.
Round Three: Mizanin kept charging at Puder and throwing wild punches and trying to tie him up. It appeared Miz's strategy was to grab as much as possible. He noticeably looked at the screen at one point to see the clock. The round ended with fans booing, and Miz holding his hands up.
Theodore R. Long then announced that the fans would make the decision. Both men got applause, but it was obvious that Puder got the louder ovation. Long declared Puder the winner. Miz looked dejected, but hugged Puder anyway.
Winner: Daniel Puder.
Al Snow interviewed both men following the fight. Miz seemed content that he wasn't knocked out. Puder said that his style is Ultimate Fighting and breaking arms, not boxing with gloves on. They then plugged the Tough Enough voting.
Backstage, Eddie Guerrero told Booker T that he could pin him tonight and win the title from JBL. Booker laughed, and said he could pin Guerrero to win the belt. Guerrero said they both had another obstacle tonight, The Undertaker. Booker said he could take Undertaker down. Guerrero said he could have the Undertaker, and he would take on JBL, since he knew he could beat him. Booker said they should double team Undertaker and JBL, and then they could settle things one-on-one between themselves. Undertaker approached them from behind, stared at both men, then walked by them. Guerrero and Booker blamed each other for having a big mouth around the Dead Man.
Doug & Danny Basham vs. Hardcore Holly & Charlie Haas.
The announcer's called this a "bonus" match. Haas got right in the face of the Bashams before the match. Holly started out with Doug, putting him in a side headlock. Doug leapfrogged Holly and hit a dropkick, then slugged it out with Holly. Hardcore dodged a charge and rolled him up for a two count. Doug brought him into his corner and tagged in Danny. Danny ran into a Holly boot, and Hardcore delivered a back suplex for a two count. Haas tagged in and worked over Danny in a corner with forearms. Haas booted Danny and took him down with a fireman's carry. Danny fought back with punches and tagged in Doug. Haas slid under Doug's legs and hit a pair of armdrags. Doug snapmared Haas and hit a kick to the back, and elbow to the head, then applied a chinlock. Haas armdragged out, but was tripped by Danny as he went to the ropes. Doug delivered a series of kneedrops and tagged in Danny. The Bashams dropped a series of elbows on Haas and Danny scored a two count. "Boring" chants started to ring out, but died down quickly.
Danny dropped another elbow for a two count. Doug tagged back in, snapmared Charlie and applied a trapped arm chinlock. Haas armdragged out, but Doug hit him with a stiff clothesline. Haas hit a T-Bone suplex on Danny. Bob Holly tagged in and hit a series of clotheslines on both men. Holly backdropped Danny and dropkicked Doug. Holly gave Doug a top rope clothesline. Holly threw Danny out of the ring. Doug knocked Haas off the apron. Holly powerslammed Doug. Miss Jackie and Dawn Marie came out to check on Haas, and started fighting. Haas tried to hold them apart as referees came down to break it up. Holly was distracted by what was going on, and Danny rolled Doug out of the ring and took his place. Holly went to small package Danny (thinking it was Doug), but Danny reversed it and got the pin at the seven minute mark.
Winners: Doug & Danny Basham.
Following the match, Bob Holly yelled at Haas for letting the women ruin their match.
The Royal Rumble commercial aired. It shows members of both rosters, dressed in wigs and costumes as if they were in "West Side Story" and singing (yes, singing) about having a Rumble. Babyfaces and heels in the same "gangs", they appeared to have them divided up by brand. Suddenly, the singing ended, and Vince McMahon was shown sitting up in bed saying "That's not the rumble I had in mind".
The events leading to Jesus vs. John Cena was shown.
Streetfight: U.S. Champion John Cena vs. Jesus, with Carlito Caribbean Cool.
It was announced before the match that it was No DQ, and Falls Count Anywhere. Cena wore a "Ruck Fules" shirt, and a new U.S. Title belt, which had a spinning front plate decorated like a U.S. Flag. Cena glared at Jesus as he came down the aisle with Carlito, who still had his arm in a sling. Carlito spat apple at Cena from the apron, but instead of going after Carlito, Cena charged Jesus as he was coming into the ring. The bell rang as Cena punched Jesus down in a corner, then choked him against the bottom rope. Jesus raked Cena's eyes, and Carlito threw a kendo stick to Jesus. Jesus hit Cena in the side with it, targeting his kidney, but Cena charged him and knocked him to the floor. Cena got control of the stick on the outside and beat Jesus with it again and again. Cena kicked Jesus' head against the ringpost. Cena chased after Carlito, who ran up the aisle. Cena yelled after him "you're next". Cena went back to Jesus, hitting him with a series of right hands. Cena dared Carlito to come back down the aisle. Cena took off his shirt, revealing bandages on his back from the "kidney injury". Cena kicked Jesus, who was now bleeding, in the head.
They went into the crowd, with Cena punching Jesus and choking him with a television cable. Cena stopped to have a beer with a fan, then went back to pounding Jesus. Cena hit him with a trash can, as they were going up into the stands. Cena was threatening to toss Jesus off an entranceway, but Carlito showed up and hit a weak shot at Cena. Jesus and Carlito tried to run away, but Cena caught up with him, putting a trash can on Jesus' head. Carlito tried to get involved again, but had no affect, as Cena continued to pound Jesus back to ringside. Cena jumped off the guardrail and gave Jesus a facebuster into the mats on the floor. Cena tossed Jesus back into the ring and pulled out a metal trash can lid and a street sign. Cena blasted Jesus with both weapons. Cena pumped up his sneakers and gave Jesus an FU for the pin, ending the one sided squash at the eight minute mark.
Winner: John Cena
Post-match, Carlito went to steal Cena's lock and chain again, but Cena stopped him. Cena grabbed the chain and knocked out Carlito with it. Cena then took his belt and chain and left the ring.
Backstage, Miss Jackie told Charlie Haas she can't believe Dawn Marie came out during Haas' match tonight. Haas said he was getting tired of everything going on. Jackie said she was going to take care of Dawn tonight. Charlie reminded her to take off her engagement ring before the match, which he took and put in his pocket. Charlie and Jackie kissed, and Charlie slapped her on the rear end to send her off to the ring.
Miss Jackie vs. Dawn Marie, Charlie Haas as referee.
Haas came to the ring with Jackie. Dawn slapped Jackie to start the match, and Jackie returned the shot. Jackie tossed Dawn around by the hair, and Dawn tried to backdrop Jackie to the ring apron. Jackie hit a shoulderblock from the apron. In the ring, Dawn hit a headbutt and they two traded punches. Dawn hit some shoulderblocks in a corner, and Dawn spat on Jackie. Jackie and Dawn rolled around on the mat, and rolled over Haas. Dawn approached Haas, and Jackie rolled her up from behind. Dawn reversed the rollup, and hooked the tights as Haas counted to three, ending the match at the two minute mark.
Winner: Dawn Marie.
Haas revealed that he was indeed having an affair with Dawn Marie, saying he loved Jackie, but he was not "in love with her". Haas said Jackie was beautiful, but making love to her was like making love to a "dead wet fish". Jackie started to cry. Haas pulled out the engagement ring from his pocket, turned to Dawn, and asked "Dawn, why are you such a slut?" Haas said he wouldn't marry either one of them, and left the ring, with many in the crowd chanting "Charlie".
Backstage, Joy Giovanni approached Big Show and gave him a kiss for good luck.
Big Show vs. Kurt Angle, Luther Reigns & Mark Jindrak.
Jindrak started off with Show, dodging a lockup and doing the old Rick Rude hip swivel. Jindrak started flexing his muscles, then locked up with Show. Show put him in a armbar and lifted him off the mat. Show chopped Jindrak in a corner, then gave him a Beel throw across the ring. Jindrak tagged Angle, despite Angle not wanting it. Angle got in the ring, and Show shoved him to the mat. They locked up, and Show shoved him down again. Angle tagged in Luther. Luther threw some punches, but Show put him in a corner and chopped him, then snapmared Luther. Show knocked Angle off the apron, brought Jindrak into the ring, and headbutted both men. Angle pulled Show over the top rope from the apron, and Luther and Jindrak hit a double shoulderblock. Angle kicked the downed Show, but tagged out quickly to Jindrak. Jindrak stomped Show down in a corner and hit a dropkick, then tagged in Luther. Reigns choked Show in a corner, but Show tripped him to the mat. Jindrak tagged back in, and Reigns and Jindrack gave Show a double vertical suplex for two. Angle tagged in and applied a camel clutch variation. Angle switched into a reverse front facelock, then into a more traditional facelock. Show got to his feet and lifted Angle, but Luther came out and hit him in the back.
Angle stood on Show's back to choke him against the bottom rope, then tagged in Luther, who continued the assault. Show battled back with a headbutt, but Reigns kicked him in the leg and tagged Jindrak, who kicked at Show's legs. Angle came in to tackle Show to the mat, allowing Jindrak to apply a camel clutch. Show battled up, but Angle ran in for a cheapshot. Luther came in and he and Jindrak whipped Show across the ring, but Show rallied, slamming Jindrak and Reigns. Angle came in, and Show grabbed him by the throat, but Reigns and Jindrak double teamed him. Big Show hit a double clothesline on them, then gave Jindrak a reverse powerbomb (throwing Jindrak backwards over his head from a powerbomb position). Show gave Angle a headbutt. Show whipped Luther across the ring, and he went over the top rope to the floor. Angle hit the Angle Slam on Show, but when he went for the ankle lock, Show kicked him from the ring. Luther and Jindrak went for Show again, but Show swatted Reigns out of the ring. Angle went to bring the ringsteps into the ring, but Show kicked them into the face of Angle on the floor. Show then gave Jindrak the F5 (called the F5 by the announcers, who acted shocked to see the move) for the pin at the nine minute mark.
Winner: The Big Show
A video on WWE's visit to the Middle East last year was shown.
Backstage, Smackdown's number one announcer, Funaki, interviewed ... Funaki.
Funaki asked himself if he could beat Spike Dudley, when Spike walked in and
interrupted him. Spike told Funaki that he would never win the
Cruiserweight Title. Funaki and Spike had the following exchange:
Funaki: "Knock, knock"
Spike: "Who's there"
Funaki: "Armageddon"
Spike: "Armageddon who?"
Funaki: "I'm a gettin' your belt and becoming the number one Cruiserweight
champion"
Cruiserweight Champion Spike Dudley vs. Sho Funaki.
It was mentioned that the other Dudleys are still recovering from injuries suffered at the hands of the Big Show. They traded holds on the mat to start, with Funaki cradling Spike for a two count, then grabbing a small package for another two. Funaki grabbed La Magistral for another two, then Spike kneed him in the gut to stop him. Funaki blocked a hiptoss and delivered an armdrag. Funaki put Spike in an armbar, but Spike broke out with a punch. Spike floated over a slam and went for a rollup, but Funaki rode Spike through the ropes and to the floor. Funaki hit a baseball slide and tossed Spike back in for a two count. Funaki went to work on Spike's arm, but was caught with an elbow on a charge. Spike went to the top rope, but Funaki stopped him and slammed him off the top rope. Funaki dropkicked Spike for a two count. Funaki punched Spike, but was backdropped to the apron. Spike and Funaki battled up the ropes, and teased superplexing each other to the floor. Spike ended up dropping Funaki face first from the middle rope to the floor. Funaki crawled onto the apron at the eight count, but Spike dropkicked him back to the floor. Spike rolled Funaki into the ring, got a two count, then hit a double stomp.
Spike put Funaki in an abdominal stretch, but Funaki hiptossed out. Spike headbutted Funaki, then went for a slam and a back suplex, but Funaki fought to land on top of Spike on both moves for one counts. Spike gave Funaki a gutbuster out of a fireman's carry for a two count. Spike put Funaki in an abdominal stretch, punching Funaki in the ribs with his free hand while maintaining the hold. Funaki broke out, but Spike slugged him down to the mat. Funaki floated out of a back suplex and put Spike in the Tree of Woe. Funaki stood on the top rope as Spike tried to sit up in the Tree of Woe, and Funaki jumped off with a double stomp to the gut. Funaki hit a backdrop, clothesline and bulldog, and got a two count. Funaki gave Spike an enzugiri for a two count. Funaki went to the top rope and hit a flying bodypress for a two count. Funaki went for a tornado DDT, but Spike tossed him away and hit a headbutt to the midsection. Spike went for the Dudley Dog, but Funaki blocked it. Spike went for a sunset flip, but Funaki reversed it and hooked Spike's legs for the three count at the ten minute mark.
Winner and new Cruiserweight Champion: Sho Funaki.
Dave: Nothing says "screw you Cruisers" like this. UGH!
Funaki celebrated by hugging all the announcers at ringside.
A video hyping the main event was shown.
Backstage, JBL spoke with his cabinet members and acted like a defeated man as he headed towards the ring alone.
WWE Champion John Bradshaw Layfield vs. The Undertaker vs. Booker T vs. Eddie Guerrero in an "Anything Goes" Fatal Four Way match. JBL's cabinet is barred from ringside.
JBL walked to the ring, depressed, instead of his usual limo entrance. Booker T came out next, as JBL went to the floor, and Eddie Guerrero then did his usual low rider entrance. Undertaker then did his big entrance. JBL kept arguing with the referee from the floor that it wasn't fair that he could lose his title without being pinned.
JBL got into the ring at the bell, then rolled out to the floor. Undertaker attacked Booker and Guerrero to start the match, giving Booker a boot to the face and working Guerrero over in a corner. JBL rolled in and covered Booker, but the referee wasn't paying attention. Taker chased JBL around the ring and back in, where JBL found himself trapped between all three opponents. JBL was pinballed between the three with punches and forearms. Booker hit JBL with a back kick, and Taker started to elbow JBL in the corner while Guerrero and Booker just watched. Taker covered JBL, and Booker and Eddie broke it up, then double teamed Taker in a corner to the boos of the fans. Booker and Guerrero gave Taker a double elbow. Booker and Taker ended up fighting on the floor, and JBL went at it with Guerrero in the ring, suplexing Guerrero for a two count.
Booker came in and grabbed JBL, holding him so Guerrero could dropkick him. Booker and Eddie worked over JBL. Taker got on the apron, and Booker kicked him to the floor. Booker gave JBL a side slam, and Eddie hit a slingshot senton. Booker gave Taker a baseball slide. Guerrero covered JBL, and Booker pulled him off. JBL cradled Booker, and Eddie broke it up. Taker made it back into the ring and went after everyone, then gave JBL a sideslam. Eddie broke up the cover, and Taker tossed him from the ring. Taker DDT'd Booker, and JBL broke it up. JBL covered Booker, and Taker broke it up.
Taker and JBL went to the floor, with Taker punching JBL in the head. Guerrero jumped onto Taker's back with a sleeper. Taker flipped off Guerrero, but Booker hit him with a superkick. Taker elbowed Booker and tossed him into the crowd. JBL thumbed Taker in the eye and rammed him headfirst into the steps. JBL teased a powerbomb on the floor, but Taker backdropped him. Taker took Guerrero into the ring and started pounding him in the corner. Booker came in, and Taker missed a kick in the corner on him. JBL came back in, chopping and punching Booker.
Taker took over again, sending JBL to the floor and working over Booker and Guerrero. Booker hit a series of rights on Taker, but Taker hit him with a spinebuster to stop the assault. Undertaker went for the Old School ropewalk, but Eddie ran over to stop him. Taker kicked Guerrero down, then did the rope walk with Booker and hit the forearm. Undertaker slugged Guerrero from the ring, then hit a faceplant on Booker, but Guerrero got back in to break it up. Eddie threw a series of punches at Taker, but Undertaker just flung Guerrero over the top rope and to the floor. Eddie scurried away from Taker, but he tossed Eddie back into the ring, then elbowed him with his neck stretched over the ring apron. Taker legdropped Guerrero on the ring apron. JBL clotheslined Undertaker on the floor.
JBL took Booker into the ring and choked Booker with his wrist tape, which is legal here (but JBL hid it with a chinlock anyway). Guerrero pulled a ladder out from under the ring and hit Taker with it on the floor. In the ring, JBL hit Booker with an elbow, then went for the title belt. As he got back in the ring, Booker went on fire, hitting all three opponents with side kicks. Taker and JBL fell out of the ring, and Booker gave Guerrero an ax kick for a two count. The crowd was starting to get behind Guerrero.
JBL pulled Booker to the floor, and Booker kicked Taker away, but JBL raked his eyes and powerbombed Booker on the announcers table. The table didn't break, so JBL jumped off a chair and put Booker through the table with an elbow. Taker then powerbombed JBL through the Spanish announcers table. Guerrero, in the ring, saw what was going on, then pretended to be out cold in the ring. Taker got in the ring, picked Eddie off the mat, but Guerrero floated over his attempted tombstone. Guerrero ran off the ropes, but Taker caught him with a chokeslam. Taker picked up Guerrero for the Last Ride, but Eddie picked up the title belt and hit Taker in the head with it as Taker lifted him for the move.
Eddie Guerrero hit two frog splashes in a row, then covered, but Taker kicked out at two and sat up. Taker went after Guerrero, but Guerrero kicked him low and went for the ladder he pulled out earlier. Guerrero hit Taker twice with the ladder, then set it up. Guerrero climbed the ladder, with the fans chanting his name, and gave Taker a frog splash from the ladder. Guerrero clutched his knee and was slow covering Undertaker. JBL pulled the referee from the ring on the two count.
Guerrero took the ladder and knocked Undertaker to the floor with it. JBL ran back in, and Guerrero sidestepped him and JBL went into the ladder. Guerrero hit three consecutive vertical suplexes, and covered JBL, but Booker broke up the cover and tossed Guerrero to the floor. Booker gave JBL an ax kick, but Taker broke up the cover. Taker stomped Booker in a corner, then gave Guerrero Snake-Eyes and a boot to the face. Taker covered Guerrero after a legdrop, and Guerrero kicked out.
Taker chokeslammed Booker, then chokeslammed Guerrero. Taker completed the trifecta by chokeslamming JBL. Undertaker prepared to tombstone JBL, when Heidenreich ran in from nowhere and attacked Taker to a chorus of boos. Heidenreich gave Taker a spinning slam, then left the ring. JBL crawled onto Booker for a two count. JBL then crawled onto Guerrero for a two count. JBL then crawled towards Taker, but Taker sat up. Heidenreich pulled Taker from the ring and put him in the cobra clutch. JBL hit Booker with the Clothesline From Hell, and pinned him, as Guerrero tried in vain to crawl over and break up the pin, ending the match at the twenty-six minute mark.
Winner: John Bradshaw Layfield.
Heidenreich left, as did JBL. Undertaker sat on the floor, slowly getting to his feet and looking mad. Eddie and Booker sat on the mat, looking on in disbelief, as the show ended.
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