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MAIN EVENT TIME, BAD BUNNY HAS THE BEST WRESTLEMANIA DEBUT I CAN EVER REMEMBER, BAD BUNNY AND DAMIEN PRIEST TRY TO NEUTER THE BUNNY WANNABES,SHANE AND BRAUN GO IN THE CAGE, CAN AJ AND OMOS GET THE JB DONE, COME ON TAMPA AT LEAST PUT ON YOUR DAMN MASKS, ROLLINS-CESARO CAN GET US BACK GOING, TAG TEAM TURMOIL, THE RAIN IS OVER, WE ARE OPENING WITH.....A RAIN DELAY, THE FANS ARE LIVE: FULL WRESTLEMANIA NIGHT ONE BLOG

By Dave Scherer on 2021-04-10 20:06:00

This is stiff.  Sick elbow to the back from Seth.  He went for the Stomp but ate a forearm.  Cool UFO spot from Cesaro  Awesome!  The fans want him to win.  Don’t screw it up Vince.  Swing time, 23!  Neutralize.  1-2-3.  Cesaro wins.  THANK YOU VINCE for not screwing it up.  Great match, they all worked hard and the right person won.  Keep elevating him.  Fans love him and he’s great, push the mofo already.  Cesaro looks genuinely stoked.  He should be.

They came back to the announces as Corey was throwing props Cesaro’s way.  Then he put him over.  That was cool.

They recapped last night’s Smackdown “Mania” matches.  That led to Roode and Ziggler coming out for a promo.

People not wearing masks is getting a lot of play on social media.  That is not a good look for WWE.  Big E introduced The New Day for their match against Omos and AJ “I don’t want to fight for the WWE Title at WrestleMania, I want to wrestle for the tag titles” Styles.  Seriously, AJ said that to Drew McIntyre.  New Day got pyro.  Uh oh, that’s an omen.  Omos is wearing regular clothes.   They said he is so big he can wear what he wants.  Then why did Giant Gonzalez have to dress like a 7 foot tall ferret?  Omos has a muscle shirt on under his jacket. He is showing off the guns.  AJ wanted Omos to start but the New Day goaded him and Omos agreed.  Now New Day is doing their New Day stuff and Omos wants to rip them to shreds.  The story is that they are working over AJ.  AJ got to the corner a few times and Omos could have reached out and easily tagged him since he is 10 feet tall but he acted like a T Rex.  I don’t think that was the intent, but that’s what happened.

You know, I would say that New Day are making AJ look like a clown here, but who can blame them after he turned down a Title chance to fight for the belts no one cares about.  The “story” here is we are waiting forever to get Omos in there.  AJ, the former champ, is incompetent against a couple of tag guys.  Could you see John Cena selling in this spot?  Me either.  Jeez, they almost pinned him.

Omos finally tagged int.  The fans are popping.  He should squeeze these guys like a ripe zit.  Woods can’t do anything.  Either can Kofi.  He should kill these guys and take the Titles.  It looks like that may be what happens.  And it is.  You don’t want pyro tonight, it means you lose.

The booking of Styles as a clown was ridiculous but at least Omos did what he should have done and destroyed New Day.  I can’t say it was a good match, it was decent, not due to the work but due to the ridiculous way that they booked AJ.

Baron Corbin got a Snickers commercial.  Good for him.

Raino Mac is going into the cage to face the guy he thinks is stupid and stutters, even though he is neither.  I just how Shane doesn’t sweat so much that it rusts the cage and Braun gets Tetanus from it.  That could happen, yeah it really cool!  Seriously, I am hoping that Shane doesn’t do something stupid in the cage.  He’s old.  Jerry Lawler is joining commentary for this one.

Oh, and for what it’s worth, have The Cock on two Rokus and an iPad at the same time.  They allow a lot of logins and thus far no issues at all.  I didn’t expect any since Comcast is a cable and internet company.  I expected them to get this right.  Sweato is out first.  He only looks mildly moist.  That will change.

Braun came out with no shirt, showing off his ripped physique.  OK, Lawler is here to tell terrible “jokes” and call Braun stupid.  Shane is holding the door shut so Elias and Riker’s Island can come out and attack his leg with chairs.  So here we go, Raino is killing Braun with the chair.  Lawler thinks this is awesome.  That makes one of us.

Shane is sweating and dancing while he beats up the guy who should have squashed his ass in 30 seconds.  Cole said, “I can’t believe this is happening”.  Me either.  Sweato grabbed a piece of metal off of the cage since he is the strongest AARP member ever.  He is now beating Strowman with him.  This smells like Shane will dominate most of the match but lose in the end.  Maybe not, he is being tossed into the cage now.  He is taking hands to the face.  Lawler just said that would knock out an ordinary man but not Raino.  So I guess Shane will have to take a ton of abuse before he can lose.  Or win.  Lawler just used the Pirate’s Dream joke.  Is he 12?

Here we go, the bad leg gave out.  Now it’s time for middle aged mayhem from Shane.  He hit a DDT.

Shane went to the top.  Did he climb out?  No way, COAST TO COAST 2.5 count.  Now Ryker and Elias are there to help him climb out of the cage.  Yeah, he had no problem a minute ago but now?  He does.  Braun wiped the Posse Wannabes off of the cage.  They are both down.

Suddenly Shane can climb.  He made it to the top where there just so happened to be a bag with a tool box because of course it would be there.  He hit Braun and down he went.  Shane went over the top and is almost all the way down.  He waved bye bye so Braun grabbed his hand.   He peeled down the cage and brought Shane back in.  He is taking a whooping and the people are popping, so it doesn’t matter what I think I guess.  Strowman put Shane on the top of the cage.  They stood.  Strowman tossed him off, and down he went.  Sorry, if I were a multi-millionaire in my fifties, no way I would even consider that.  Braun is doing this for anyone who has been called stupid.  He said that to the fans.  He must have seen their lack of mask knowledge.  Running power slam, 1-2-3.  Braun wins.

As I am sure you can tell, I wasn’t a fan.  But if I am being fair, I totally get why you could like it.  It was the ridiculous of wrestling so if you enjoyed it, I won’t say a word.  I am happy for you.  And to be fair, I respect how completely insane Shane is.  I respect it, but I don’t understand it.  I hope he isn’t in too much pain for the rest of April.

Please click to Page 3 for more thoughts from tonight's show!


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