Damien Sandow comes out and he wants to beg everyone’s indulgence for a moment. He introduces himself and he says that he has attempted to help everyone. That has turned out to be futile. He cannot and will not abandon everyone. Despite the eminent handicap emanating from the crowd, he will allow one person to be his apprentice.
Sandow has found his candidate. Although he will be addressing his questions to an individual, he wants everyone to see if they know the answers because it could be them next time.
Damien tells the candidate to stand up straight. He says that all he has to do is answer three questions correctly. The first question is H2O is the chemical composition of what and he gets it right. The second question is to name the first President of the United States and he is two for two.
The third question is a quote from English poetry and he is wrong. Damien tells him that the answer is John Keats. Damien tells him that ignorance is curable but stupid is forever. He tells the candidate to leave the building and even be exiled from the United States. Damien tells everyone ‘You’re Welcome’.
Santino Marella comes to the ring and he has a question for Damien. How many seashells does she sell, but Santino has trouble saying the tongue twister.
Damien says that he is on an Arthurian quest for an apprentice. Damien says that the most common seashell is a bivalve.
Santino says that the correct answer is the conch shell.
Sandow punches Santino and then he goes to the apron. Santino is ready for a fight and we go to commercial.
Match Number Four:Damien Sandow versus Santino Marella
The match is joined in progress and Santino with punches but Sandow with a kick. Sandow does the power walk and then he gets a jackknife cover after a double leg take down. Sandow with knees to the ribs and he chokes Santino. Sandow with knees and a forearm to the back. Sandow rubs Santino’s face in the mat. Sandow bows and then he hits the side Russian leg sweep and he floats through to try the Elbow of Disdain and he hits it.
Sandow with a near fall. Sandow tries for a suplex but Santino counters with an inside cradle for a near fall. Santino with jabs followed by a split and hip toss. Santino gets the Cobra ready but Sandow goes to the floor. Santino follows Sandow around the ring and Sandow kicks Santino. Sandow throws the puppet away. Santino with a punch and then he misses the diving head butt from the top.
Sandow with Terminus for the three count.
Winner: Damien Sandow
After the match, Sandow does the Cartwheel of Creativity.
Do you think you are smarter than Damien Sandow, you can Tout him a question.
Dolph Ziggler tells Vickie that Big Show is the worst tag team partner because he only cares about himself. Dolph says that he should not be in tag matches.
Vickie says that she is losing faith in him.
Dolph demands a rematch against John Cena at TLC.
Vickie tells him to show them baby.
Dolph looks like he is going to kiss Vickie but Vickie stops him because she doesn’t want to look like a hypocrite.
Brad Maddox is in Vickie’s office with his film crew. Brad says that he is here to make sure that nobody forgets the name Brad Maddox.
We go to commercial.
We are back and Vickie Guerrero tells Brad that she is busy. Why should she give Brad a contract?
Brad says that CM Punk had nothing to do with what he did at Hell in a Cell. Vickie would cement her place as one of the most powerful women in WWE history. Brad says that she has an eye for talent and entertainment. Brad says that it don’t get much more entertaining than Brad Maddox. Brad says that you put him on Raw and it goes from good TV to great TV.
Vickie gives Brad a match and if he wins, he gets a contract.
Brad asks who his opponent is and Vickie says that he will find out in the ring.
Vickie says that it will be GREAT TV.
Match Number Five: Sin Cara versus Alberto Del Rio (with Ricardo Rodriguez)
They lock up and Del Rio backs Cara into the corner. Del Rio with a clean break and then he kicks Cara in the leg and head. Del Rio with a slam and he gets a near fall as Cara looks for his special lighting. Cara with an arm drag or two and an arm bar. Del Rio backs Cara into the corner and connects with shoulders until the referee warns him.
Del Rio with a savate kick for a near fall. Del Rio tries to send Cara to the floor but Cara bounces off the ropes and he hits an arm drag. Cara goes to the ropes and uses them for leverage on an arm drag. Cara gets a near fall. Cara with kicks to the chest. Cara with a running kick and he gets a near fall.
Del Rio with a suplex and he gets a near fall. Del Rio with a reverse chin lock. Del Rio sends Cara to the mat and he kicks Cara in the back. Del Rio chokes Cara in the ropes and tries to start to work on the arm. Cara with a drop kick to the head and then Del Rio sends Cara to the apron. Cara avoids a splash into the ropes and Cara with a kick to the midsection.
Cara with a rana off the apron and Del Rio goes into the ringside barrier. Ricardo checks on Del Rio. We go to commercial.
We are back and Cara with an arm bar but Del Rio with kicks and a punch. Del Rio misses a clothesline. Cara with a rana for a near fall. Del Rio goes to the floor. Cara kicks Del Rio in the leg and then he sends Del Rio back into the ring. Cara tries for a springboard move but Del Rio pushes Cara to the floor and Cara hits the announce table. Del Rio sends Cara into the ringside barrier.
Del Rio sends Cara back into the ring and Del Rio gets a near fall. Del Rio with a boot to the back and then he puts his knee in Cara’s back. Del Rio goes after Cara’s mask. Cara with punches but Del Rio with a German suplex and bridge for a near fall. Del Rio sets for a charge into the corner but Cara moves out of the way. Cara with a kick and then he hits a tornado DDT and both men are down.
Del Rio and Cara exchange punches and Del Rio gains control. Cara with a handspring back elbow and then he hits a head scissors take down. Del Rio sends Cara to the apron and Cara with an enzuigiri. Cara goes up top and hits a cross body for a near fall. Cara hits the Asai DDT and then he goes to the turnbuckles. Cara misses the Swanton but Cara has La Mistica blocked by Del Rio. Del Rio floats over and applies the cross arm breaker and Cara taps out.
Winner: Alberto Del Rio
Vince McMahon is walking in the back and he wants one of the assistants in the back to tell Vickie Guerrero that he wants to her in the ring.
We go to commercial.
We are back and in case you missed the first 120 minutes of the show, you can see why we will get a lie detector test tonight on Raw.
Vickie Guerrero makes her way to the ring. Vickie introduces Vince McMahon and he makes his way to the ring.
Vickie tells Vince that he looks quite handsome tonight.
Vince thanks Vickie and he tells Vickie that she looks rather . . . almost . . . semi-comely.
Vince wants to talk about the TLC pay per view.
Vickie suggests John Cena vesus Dolph Ziggler. Vince likes it. Vickie says that it will be epic. Vince says that if you want to make it epic, Vickie would add a stipulation. Vickie suggests a No Disqualification Match.
Vince is not too happy and reminds Vickie that the pay per view is called Tables, Ladders, and Chairs, not No Disqualification.
Vince whispers something in Vickie’s ear and she yells out a Ladder Match and Vince likes it.
Vickie says that you need something to reach for in a ladder match. Vince says that he didn’t think about that. What if there was a briefcase hanging above them. Vince suggests the Money in the Bank briefcase. Vickie wonders how people would feel since it is so unfair to Dolph. Cena could win everything while Dolph loses everything.
Vince asks Vickie if it has been fair to have her and Dolph perpetuate the crap with the AJ and John Cena affair. Doesn’t Vickie deserve to make this official for John Cena.
Vince tells Vickie to have a good rest of the night.
Vickie says that she has something else to say.
Vince says that he heard there is a lie detector test tonight. Vince asks Vickie what should happen if Punk is lying? Vickie likes that suggestion. Shouldn’t he be punished because no one likes a liar. Vickie says that lying is bad. Vickie says that if Punk is lying, then the mastermind behind this must be destroyed. Since Punk is a Heyman guy, he wouldn’t put Paul in harm’s way. If Punk is lying, there will be a match next week. Paul Heyman versus Ryback.
Vince wants to hear it for Vickie.
Brad Maddox is walking in the back as we go to commercial.
Match Number Six: Brad Maddox versus Randy Orton
Brad goes into the ropes and then he connects with an elbow but Orton punches Maddox and Brad goes to the floor. Orton with a clothesline on the floor. Orton sends Maddox to the apron for the IEDDT and he hits it. Orton looks around and then he twists to the mat for the RKO. Orton gets the three count.
Winner: Randy Orton
After the match, The Shield go after Orton and it is a three on one attack. They get Orton set up for the Three Man Spike Power Bomb.
We go to commercial.
We are back and Vickie Guerrero is yelling at Charles Robinson. Dolph Ziggler enters and wants to know what Vickie is doing by putting the contract on the line at TLC. He reminds Vickie about when AJ did this. Vickie tells Dolph that is what he wanted and she was standing next to Vince. Dolph says that Vickie is becoming just like AJ.
Paul Heyman enters the office and he gets face to face with Vickie in a Wrestlemania poster-esque pose that reminds people of Hogan and Andre from Wrestlemania III. They say nothing until Vickie tells Paul that for his sake, he better hope that Punk is telling the truth. Paul smirks and leaves.
Someone actually knocks on the door and it is John Cena. John says that somebody wanted to see him. He says that he is okay with a date. John says that he likes the match at TLC. John thanks Vickie. John says that he is the only one who failed to cash in the briefcase. John says that when he gets that briefcase, he will become champion. John thanks Vickie again.
Vickie tells John that she had the Divas locker room cleaned out and she found some John Cena stuff in AJ’s locker. She warns John that AJ gets obsessed with any man she gets involved with.
John tells Vickie that they are not real WWE merchandise and he says that Vickie has exposed herself.
Match Number Seven: Kofi Kingston and R Truth versus Wade Barrett and Antonio Cesaro
Before the match, Teddy Long makes his way to the stage and he tells the playas in the ring that this is supposed to be a tag team match. Since Vickie is having her problems and since Booker T is not here and since Mr. McMahon is looking to spice things up. Why not make this a Fatal Four Way Championship Match.
Teddy wants to know which title should be on the line? It is up to the WWE Universe and it is time for a RawActive vote.
Match Number Seven (Take Two): Kofi Kingston versus Wade Barrett versus Antonio Cesaro versus R Truth for the United States Title
Truth and Cesaro battle while Barrett and Kofi fight in the other corner. Truth and Barrett go to the floor and Kofi with a near fall. Cesaro with a waist lock and elbow drop followed by a head butt. Cesaro with a running European uppercut into the corner while Barrett clotheslines Truth on the floor.
Cesaro with an Irish whip and he runs into a pendulum kick. Barrett clotheslines Cesaro over the top rope to the floor. Barrett avoids a springboard move by Kofi and then he hits a pump handle slam for a near fall. Barrett with a head butt to the back of Kofi’s head. Kofi with a baseball slide to Cesaro on the floor.
Truth dances and that pisses off Barrett. Truth punches Barrett and Wade goes to the floor. Truth and Kofi are in the ring and they shake hands before locking up. Truth with an honorable wrist lock but Kofi with a leg sweep for a near fall. Truth with arm drags to Kofi and then they each try for a drop kick and both men go to a stalemate.
Barrett with an elbow to Kofi while Cesaro goes after Truth. Kofi forces Cesaro to the floor. Kofi clotheslines Barrett over the top rope to the floor. Kofi with a suicide dive onto Barrett. Truth goes for a pescado but Cesaro moves and then he runs Truth into the ringside barrier. Kofi goes off the steps but he is met with a European uppercut and Kofi is down.
We go to commercial.
We are back and Kofi and Antonio exchange punches and then Cesaro with a Giant Swing single leg crab. Kofi kicks Cesaro away and Truth with a clothesline to Cesaro followed by a sit out gourdbuster. Truth with a split and then he sets for the spinning elbow drop but Barrett pulls down the ropes and Truth goes to the floor.
Cesaro and Barrett exchange punches and European uppercuts. Kofi with a springboard cross body onto Cesaro but Barrett breaks up the cover. Barrett with a Blackpool Slam to Kofi for a near fall but Truth makes the save. Truth with an axe kick on Barrett for a near fall. Barrett with a back heel kick to Truth and Barrett with an elbow to the back of the head. Barrett puts Truth on the top turnbuckle and he punches Truth. Barrett sets for a superplex but Truth with a head butt to send Barrett to the apron.
Cesaro with forearms to Truth and then he rakes the face. Kofi with an arm drag off the turnbuckles to Cesaro. Barrett tries for the superplex again but Kofi comes under Barrett and hits a power bomb to add to the superplex. Cesaro breaks up the cover. Cesaro with the Alpamare Water Slide for a near fall on Kingston.
Truth catapults Cesaro into the ropes and then Truth clotheslines Cesaro over the top rope and they both go to the floor. Barrett tries for a belly-to-back suplex but Kofi lands on his feet. Kofi with chops followed by a drop kick and Superman punch. Kofi with the Boom drop on Barrett.
Kofi sets for Trouble in Paradise but Cesaro pulls Kofi to the floor. Cesaro sets for the Gotch Style Neutralizer on Barrett but Truth with a spinning kick. Barrett with the Bullhammer to Truth but Kofi with Trouble in Paradise to Barrett. Cesaro picks up Kofi and deadlifts him into the Gotch Style Neutralizer for the three count.
Winner: Antonio Cesaro
We go to commercial.
We are back and Randy Orton will face Wade Barrett on Smackdown.
It is time for the main event and since this is a wrestling show, we have a lie detector test. Miz is in the ring for MizTV. He is in the ring with the lie detector operator from the Sheriff’s Department.
Miz reminds us that CM Punk claimed that he was not working with Brad Maddox or the Shield.
CM Punk and Paul Heyman make their way to the ring.
Miz explains how a lie detector test works and Punk says that he knows how it works. Punk wants to be asked if he thinks Miz having his mic upside down is stupid. Punk says that Miz’ title reign was forgettable so he is trying to be like Punk.
Miz starts off with a baseline test question. He asks Punk what is his name.
He asks Punk if he has been WWE Champion for 379 days and Punk says yes.
Did Rey Mysterio shave his head bald at Over the Limit 2010. Punk says yes.
In the year that Miz main evented Wrestlemania, did Punk lose to Randy Orton. Punk says yes.
Punk says that Miz won his match at Wrestlemania because Dwayne helped him win. Punk says that people remember the end of Punk and Orton. Miz did not remember what happened because he had a concussion and most would like to forget that match.
Miz says that if Punk wants harder questions, he is ready.
Does Punk think that he can beat Ryback by himself. Punk says yes and we have a ‘He’s lying’ spike.
Punk says that it is an opinion.
Miz asks Punk if he worked with Brad Maddox at Hell in a Cell, did he work with The Shield at Survivor Series.
The Shield attack the Miz and Punk gets out of the ring while Ambrose and Reigns destroy the table in the ring.
Miz is brought back into the ring and they triple team him. They get Miz set up for the Shield Spike Power Bomb.
Daniel Bryan and Kane make their way to the ring and they go after The Shield. Once the odds are returned to The Shield’s favor, they take control.
Ryback’s music plays and he makes his way to the ring. Ryback clotheslines Ambrose, Reigns, and Rollins. Ryback sends Ambrose to the floor. Ryback sends Ambrose into the crowd. Bryan works over Rollins while Kane deals with Reigns. Ryback and Ambrose fight to the back. Rollins and Bryan go into the crowd as well. Kane and Reigns make it a hat trick of brawls into the crowd.
CM Punk is in the ring and he asks Miz if he has some questions for him now. He kicks Miz in the chest and then he tells Miz to get out of his ring.
Ryback interrupts Punk’s celebration in the ring and he hits the marching muscle buster. Ryback gets a chair and he brings it into the ring. He also gets a ladder from another side of the ring. Ryback waits for Punk to get up and he hits Punk in the midsection with a ladder. Ryback grabs the chair and hits Punk in the back. Ryback remembers that there is a ‘T’ in the TLC pay per view name and he brings a table into the ring.
Ryback sets up for a power bomb through the table and he hits it.
We go to credits.
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