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WWE RAW REPORT: WHAT HAPPENS WHEN 20 CHAMPIONS ARE IN THE RING?; ARE SEEDS BEING PLANTED FOR WRESTLEMANIA?; ANDTHE SLAMMYS TOO

By Richard Trionfo on 2013-12-09 23:04:32
Movies have the Oscars. Music has the Grammys. Theater has the Tonys. But wrestling has the Slammys. You will get to pick the winners by going to the WWE app. If you haven’t downloaded the app, I am sure that there will be an explanation of how to download the app later.

We are in Seattle, Washington and your announcers are John ‘Starbucks’ Layfield, Michael ‘Cobain’ Cole, and Jerry ‘Frasier’ Lawler.

Jerry is not at the announce table since he is hosting the Slammys with Booker T. We can now find out how to download the WWE App.

Match Number One: Daniel Bryan versus Fandango (with Summer Rae)

They lock up and Fandango with a side head lock and shoulder tackle. Bryan with a drop kick followed by a European uppercut or two. Fandango with a knee to the midsection for a near fall. Fandango with a suplex and he gets another near fall. Fandango with chops to Bryan followed by an Irish whip. Fandango with punches in the corner.

Fandango with another Irish whip but Bryan with a drop toe hold that sends Fandango into the turnbuckles and then he kicks Fandango. Bryan works on the shoulder and he kicks Fandango in the shoulder.

Bryan wants to put Fandango in the surfboard but Bryan drives the knees into the mat and then he gets a near fall. Fandango sends Bryan through the ropes to the floor. Fandango misses a pescado when Bryan moves. Bryan with a suicide dive onto Fandango. Bryan with an Irish whip into the ringside barrier followed by a drop kick.

They return to the ring and Bryan goes up top. Bryan tries for a missile drop kick and Fandango counters with a sit out power bomb.

We go to commercial.

We are back and Bryan flips out of the corner on an Irish whip and then he hits a flying clothesline. Bryan with kicks to the chest and then he catches Bryan with the round kick but does not hit it perfectly and Bryan gets a near fall. Bryan with a drop kick into the corner followed by more kicks. Bryan with an Irish whip but he misses a drop kick in the corner. Fandango with a modified Falcon Arrow.

Fandango goes up top but misses the FandangoBama Jam. Bryan goes up top for the diving head butt and he connects. Bryan sets for the flying knee and he connects and gets the three count.

Winner: Daniel Bryan

After the match, we get a Wyatt Blipvert and we look to the TitanTron. Bray says that while it is his behavior that draws him to Daniel, his unwillingness to comply is bothering him. He does not wish to see Daniel suffer. There is no such thing as a happy ending in his world. He won’t roll Daniel down a hill of dandelions. The story ends the same way. He needs Bryan and he does not want to hurt him.

Bray says that Daniel is a monster like him. He tells Daniel to join them.

The lights go out after the second Wyatt Blipvert. The lights come back on and Bryan says ‘No’.

It is time for the first Slammy Award to be announced. You can only vote on the WWE App.

We go to our hosts, Booker T and Jerry Lawler on the stage.

Jerry says that a lot of people are on pins and needles in the back. Booker says the WWE Universe’s voice will be heard.

Booker asks Jerry if he has ever ‘Laughed Out Loud’. It is time for the first award to be presented and the presenters for the LOL Moment Slammy are the New Age Outlaws.

Billy and BG are dressed in their best Dumb and Dumber tuxedos.

The winner is . . . going to be announced when we come back from commercial.

We are back and it is time to finally find out who wins the Slammy for the LOL Moment. The winner is . . . The Rock Concert.

Vickie Guerrero comes out as only Vickie can by saying EXCUSE ME a few times. Vickie says thanks to the Rock for appreciating her beauty.

Big E Langston joins the announce team for our next match.

Match Number Two: Santino Marella versus Damien Sandow

Sandow with forearms to the back. Sandow charges into the corner but Santino moves and he gets a near fall with a rollup. Sandow with an Irish whip and Santino power walks until Sandow connects with a knee to the midsection. Sandow with punches and a knee drop. Sandow punches Santino while in the ropes.

Sandow with a side Russian leg sweep and the Elbow of Disdain. Sandow gets a near fall. Sandow with forearms across the chest. Sandow with a reverse chin lock. Santino with a Saito suplex and both men are down. Santino with a split and hip toss followed by a diving head butt. Santino looks around and he pulls out his cobra.

Sandow with a spinning leg sweep followed by You’re Welcome for the three count.

Winner: Damien Sandow

After the match Langston goes into the ring and he confronts his opponent on Sunday. Sandow leaves the ring.

It is time for our next Slammy and it is Double Cross of the Year. Your presenters are The Shield.

Dean says that he knows he looks great. He says that they have already won two Slammys but they know nothing about that. Seth says that 2013 was the Year of the Shield. They did everything face to face. Roman says that you better wake up if you think you are going to double cross the Shield.

The winner is . . . coming up after this commercial.

We are back and the winner is . . . Shawn Michaels for screwing over Daniel Bryan at Hell in a Cell.

Shawn says that he has a lot on his mind but he cannot talk too long. He has been fortunate enough to win a lot of Slammys, but not for Double Cross of the Year. Over 25 years, he has double crossed a lot of people. It takes four years after retirement to win a Slammy? He has been double crossing people for years. He calls it an injustice.

Shawn responds to a ‘You Sold Out’ chant by telling the pinhead he sold out years ago and that is why he is still here.

Match Number Three: Kofi Kingston versus Miz

Kofi with a drop kick followed by an Irish whip and splash into the corner. Kofi with a drop kick and he keeps Miz from leaving the ring. Kofi blocks a kick and he punches Miz and kicks him in the corner. Miz with a boot to Kofi but Miz runs into a boot from Kofi and Kofi gets a near fall. Kofi with a knee to the chest and he kicks him again. Kofi with a third kick for a near fall.

Miz avoids Trouble in Paradise and Miz goes to the floor to slow down the pace. Miz says that he has had enough and he walks up the ramp. Kofi follows after him and he hits Miz from behind. Kofi sends Miz into the ringside barrier and then back into the ring. Kofi with a springboard clothesline and then Kofi gets a near fall but Miz kicks out and it sends Kofi into the turnbuckles. Miz gets the three count with a rollup.

Winner: Miz

After the match, Kofi hits Miz with Trouble in Paradise.

Eve Torres is out and it is time for the Diva of the Year Slammy.

The winner is . . .

We are back and there will be a Championship Ascension Ceremony later tonight.

The winner is The Bellas

Match Number Four: Rey Mysterio, Big Show, Cody Rhodes, and Goldust versus Antonio Cesaro, Jack Swagger, Ryback and Curtis Axel (with Zeb Colter)

Ryback and Rey start things off and Ryback with a kick and forearm to the back. Rey escapes a power slam attempt and he kicks Ryback. Ryback with a drop kick to the leg and Ryback falls into the ropes but Ryback is able to free himself and he goes to the floor before Rey can hit the 619.

Show tags in and they lock up to a stalemate. They lock up again and Show pushes Ryback to the mat. Show with punches and a chop. Show with a hard Irish whip and then he sends Ryback into the corner for the Shhhh chop. Goldust tags in and he connects with a drop down uppercut. Goldust with a snap mare and forearm as we go to commercial.

We are back and Cesaro with a reverse chin lock on Rey. Rey with an elbow followed by a head scissors. Goldust tags in and Rey with a drop kick and Goldust with a knee drop for a near fall. Cesaro with a knee and Swagger tags in and he punches Goldust.

Goldust punches back and he connects with a clothesline. Goldust with another drop down uppercut and he punches Swagger in the corner. Goldust knocks Cesaro off the apron but Swagger takes care of Goldust.

Cesaro winds up for a clothesline on the floor after he makes the tag and he connects. Cesaro rolls Goldust back in and he gets a near fall. Axel tags in and he kicks Goldust and connects with a drop kick. Axel gets another near fall and then he rubs his forearm across Goldust’s face.

Ryback tags in and he punches Goldust. Ryback kicks Goldust and then he tags in Swagger. Swagger with a front face lock but Goldust tries to get to his corner but Swagger stops him. Cesaro tags in while Goldust goes for a sunset flip and Cesaro with kicks to Goldust.

Cesaro with a double stomp for a near fall and a reverse chin lock. Goldust gets to his feet and he punches Cesaro. Cesaro tries for a hip toss but Goldust blocks it and he gets a near fall with a back slide. Goldust with a power slam and both men are down. Swagger tags in and he Irish whips Goldust into his corner and he connects with a knee. Goldust is stopped by Swagger and Cesaro momentarily but Goldust with a double DDT.

Cody and Axel tag in and Cody with clotheslines. Cody floats over and gets a near fall with a sunset flip. Cody with a kick and drop down uppercut to Axel. Cody goes to the apron for a springboard drop kick and he connects and gets a near fall. Cody goes up top and hits a moonsault but Ryback breaks up the cover. Show with a spear and Ryback goes to the floor. Show with a spear to Cesaro and Swagger.

Cody with a kick followed by Beautiful Disaster and then Rey makes the tag and he sends Axel into the ropes with head scissors. Rey with a 619 and swan dive for the three count.

Winners: Rey Mysterio, Big Show, Cody Rhodes, and Goldust

In case you don’t have one of those fancy iPhones, now you can learn how to download the app on an Android Phone.

We go back to Jerry and Booker. Jerry says that everyone wants to make an unforgettable presence in the ring to win Superstar of the Year. Shawn Michaels is the presenter of the award.

Shawn says that he should have Mr. Slammy added to the many names to describe him. This award goes to the man who dazzles you, entertains you, and gives you nothing short of an A+ performance.

The winner is . . . Daniel Bryan.

Daniel gets his award and Shawn refuses to let go of the trophy while they stare each other down. Shawn eventually leaves.

Daniel thanks Shawn Michaels for the HBShizzle Award. He thinks if it wasn’t for Shawn, he wouldn’t be in WWE. If it weren’t for Shawn, he would be the WWE Champion. He is not angry about it because The Authority does not want Daniel Bryan to be Superstar of the Year, it is the people. 2014 will be even better. Daniel ends his comments with ‘Go Seahawks’.

Alberto Del Rio discussed what happened last week. He says that he is a WWE Champion and a World Champion while Sin Cara has done nothing.

Match Number Five: Sin Cara versus Alberto Del Rio

The lights go down and Cara with knees and a chop followed by forearms. Del Rio with a thrust kick and he sends Cara to the mat. Cara with a cross body and punches to Del Rio. Cara kicks Del Rio. Del Rio with a kick and suplex.

Del Rio misses a super kick and Cara with a drop kick. Cara with forearms and Del Rio goes to the floor. Cara with a kick to keep Del Rio on the floor followed by a pescado onto Del Rio. Cara sends Del Rio into the ringside barrier. Cara with a chop but Del Rio with an step up enzuigiri and a kick to Cara.

Del Rio misses a back senton from the turnbuckles and he kicks Del Rio. Cara goes up top but Del Rio rolls to the floor. We go to commercial.

We are back and Del Rio with a reverse chin lock. We go to no longer exclusive footage from the app and Del Rio with a double stomp while Cara was in the tree of woe. Del Rio with head butts as we return to live action. Cara with an elbow to Del Rio followed by a missile drop kick for a near fall.

Del Rio with a tilt-a-whirl back breaker for a near fall. Del Rio slaps Cara in the head and Cara falls to the floor. Del Rio sends Cara into the ringside barrier. Del Rio returns to the ring and the referee starts his count. Cara rolls back into the ring and Del Rio with a snap mare and reverse chin lock.

Cara with punches and kicks followed by an attempted springboard sunset flip but Del Rio rolls through and hits a drop kick. Del Rio misses a splash into the corner and Cara with a tornado DDT. Both men are down. Cara with a head scissors followed by a handspring back elbow for a near fall.

Del Rio sets for the float over but Cara counters and he hits a modified Olympic Slam. Cara goes up top but Del Rio crotches him. Del Rio with punches and head butts followed by a superplex set up but Cara counters with a sunset flip power bomb. Cara goes up top for the Swanton and he hits it and gets the three count.

Winner: Sin Cara

It is time for the Fan Participation Slammy and your presenters are Titus O’Neil and Darren Young. Titus says a live event is the best place to make your voice be heard loud and proud.

The winner is . . .

Coverage continues on next page


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