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Welcome to PWInsider.com's coverage of this week's TNA Impact, a special Hardy Halloween edition. It is airing today on TNA+ ahead of tomorrow's edition on AXS TV.
After a special opening, Matt Hardy and Jeff Hardy, in studio in their Broken selves, introduced the special. Matt ran down all the members of their cast before welcoming everyone Happy Halloween. They are going to document the events that have happened at the Hardy compound, starting with Final Deletion...
Final Deletion: Matt Hardy vs. Jeff Hardy
Manservant Benjamin reads a statement (in Spanish) that what we are about to see is performed by trained professionals and should not be attempted at home. This is edited in a way that doesn't really make it a cohesive wrestling match, so I'll do my best to hit the highlights. It's edited more like a fight scene from a movie, as Jeff superplexes Matt and gives him a diving headbutt. He gets what looks like a piece of flowered trellis and throws Matt through it for 2, then Matt gives him a Twist of Fate for 2 and starts beating him with a kendo stick. Matt breings a ladder into the ring and works Jeff over with it. This looks like an episode of Lost mixed with wrestling with all the torches and trees. Jeff gives Matt his own Twist of Fate, tears off the shirt, and comes off the top with a Swanton for 2. We have dramatic music in the background for this whole thing as Jeff sets up a ladder in the corner, gives Matt another Twist of Fate, and puts him on top of the ladder. Jeff climbs another ladder int
Winner: Matt Hardy
Matt and Jeff discuss the impact of the match, which led to Delete or Decay...
DELETE OR DECAY!
Eerie music plays as Decay makes their way onto the Hardy compound and find Senor Benjamin digging graves for them. Benjamin holds up his shovel, which has DELETE painted on the back, and smiles at them as they make their way toward Matt Hardy's house and see him holding his son inside. A spider sways on its web as they stare in the window and sing "Hush Little Baby" at King Maxel. Matt tells Decay that he knew they'd come, and he leads them out to the battlefield, where Brother Nero and Reby are waiting with fireworks launchers, which they unload at Decay as they run for their lives. They take a break so Matt can send Reby back to the castle to take care of King Maxel, then they continue firing on Decay, who are hiding behind Skarsgard. Abyss tells Steve and Rosemary to go and get to the house, and continues holding the Dilapidated Boat until Brother Nero runs up and dropkicks it on Abyss, sending him into the depths of the lake beyond.
Senor Benjamin tells Brother Nero that he has to get the boat for Mr. Hardy, who we then see tracking Decay through the woods. Senor Benjamin drags the boat back onto shore, and he's texting Mr. Hardy when all of a sudden...JOSEPH PARK COMES OUT OF THE LAKE! He says he loved Benjamin in the Final Deletion, then asks if he's seen his brother Chris. Benjamin confirms that he has, and Joseph Park goes for a big hug, but Benjamin zaps him with a taser, laughs maniacally, and carries Joseph Park away with a small bulldozer.
Meanwhile, Crazzy Steve attacks Brother Nero and tries to throw him in the fire by the pool but Nero fights him off and gives him a gourdbuster into the pool. They continue fighting underwater as Matt tracks Rosemary through the woods, and then Senor Benjamin dumps Abyss into his grave and laughs maniacally again. Meanwhile, Brother Nero chokes Steve out in the pool, climbs out, and takes a deep breath...and doesn't see Steve coming from behind to grab Brother Nero and drag him back into the pool. Senor Benjamin is just getting ready to bury Joseph Park when Abyss pops out of the grave, goozles him, and chokes him unconscious.
Back at the pool, Brother Nero chokes Steve out with an inflatable pool toy and then hobbles away. Steve climbs out of the pool, his face paint magically regenerates, and he is off in pursuit of Brother Nero. Back in the woods, Matt Hardy has finally cornered Rosemary, but Abyss comes out of nowhere and comes after Matt with Janice. Abyss tells Rosemary to go get HER baby and goes back after Matt. Matt says Janice is nothing but vermin, and Abyss swings Janice at Matt, but Brother Nero shoves him out of the way and takes the full brunt of Janice to the gut. Matt says that was so...unselfish, but then realizes he's cornered by both members of Decay.
Things are looking their bleakest, but suddenly, Vanguard-1 shows up, and he's arming the rockets. Vanguard-1 fires on Decay, and the flames light up a Hardy symbol on the lawn which has magical powers that keep Abyss and Steve trapped like a force field! Back in the Hardy castle, Reby is laid out on the floor and Rosemary is escaping with King Maxel, but then Vanguard-1 shows up and says, and I quote, "Not so fast! Put the boy down. Witch!" Rosemary gladly puts him down, Vanguard-1 tells Maxel to run, and then Rosemary spews mist at Vanguard-1 and...oh no, she knocks him...OFFLINE!
Rosemary goes back to looking for Maxel, but finds herself face to face with Matt Hardy, who says she has crossed a line she can never return from. Rosemary laughs and spews her mist at Matt, but Matt INHALES THE INCOMING MIST and spews it right back at Rosemary, causing her to scream in agony and run for her life. King Maxel and Reby come running up to Matt, and they share a big family hug as Brother Nero and Senor Benjamin...well, it looks like Jeff died out on the battlefield and Benjamin was dumped in Decay's car, kidnapped. Decay hops in their BMW and speed away as the show draws to a close.
They then talked up the Tag Team Apocalypto....
This starts inside the Dome of Deletion, and will work elimination style until one team is left standing. Matt invites every team in space and time to face the BROKEN Hardys, and we start off with the BROKEN Hardys, the Rock N Roll Express, the Helms Dynasty, and Decay. Once everyone has made their entrance, everyone who isn't competing is asked to evacuate the property, and the building fills with smoke and sirens to drive the point home. Everyone leaves and the match starts. Eddie and Lashley are still fighting outside as Matt tells the Rock N Rolls that they were all teen heartthrobs at one time, but now it's time to show those guys that they still have that fire. He hands Brother Nero, Ricky, and Robert fireworks and they shoot them at the Helms Dynasty and Decay. Helms tells his boys it's time to get the hell out of here, and they jump into Helms' pickup truck. They don't leave quick enough, because Matt is in the back of the truck and starts beating both Lee and Everett up as Helms pull
We're back, and the Hardys are brawling by the Lake of Reincarnation, and Lee almost gets a fall on Matt, but Skarsgard (the dilapidated boat) breaks the count, so the Helms Dynasty beats the piss out of the boat...not realizing Matt is standing behind them. He asks how dare they desecrate the honorable Skarsgard, and tells Helms he needs a change of Mattitude and shoves him into the lake. Matt turns around and asks the Lake of Reincarnation how they could create such a revolting result, and we see Helms in full on Three Count attire! He dances with the Helms Dynasty, then Helms says they're not Shannon and Evan, they were way better than Lee and Everett! The Bravados run in and go at it with the Helms Dynasty, leaving the Hardys free to go at it with the Rock N Rolls in the ring set up next to the volcano. Meanwhile, Eddie and Lashley are brawling somewhere, and then a referee comes out of hte port-a-potty just in time to see the Bravados and Helms Dynasty going at it. The Helms Dynasty escapes into t
We're back, and Brother Nero tells Ricky Morton it's time for the Night of the Skywalkers. They trade shots on the cranes as Matt and Robert battle below, and then they clear out after a spinning toehold spot and Matt elevates Ricky all the way as high as the crane will go. Back in the Dome of Destruction, the Bravados hit a double team springboard Ace Crusher on Lee for 2. Brother Nero leaps off the crane to go for a Swanton on Robert, but Robert moves out of the way, so Matt hits Robert with the Twist of Fate to eliminated the Rock N Roll Express. Ricky yells to let him down as Matt tells Brother Nero that he's a spot monkey and asks if he's okay. Matt welcomes Ricky to the darkness and the Hardys leave as Ricky calls him a BROKEN son of a bitch and asks him to let him down...please. Back to the Dome of Destruction as Spud and his partner...Hornswoggle. Spud comes in and eliminates the Bravados, then Horswoggle comes off the top rope with a Tadpolesplash and lets Everett cover him. Bravados, Spud &
We're back, and the Hardys, Decay, Eddie Edwards, and Bobby Lashley are all going at it when the volcano erupts! We go to the newsroom, where our intrepid reporter tells us that the Land of Deletion will collpase if the Hardys don't prove themselves the greatest tag team in all of space and time, then we go back to the Hardy Compound where Hurricane Helms shows up. Brother Nero gives Steve a Twist of Fate, Abyss chokeslams Nero, then he gets ahold of Janice. Nero gets ahole of a firework, but Steve fights him off, then Vanguard-1 shows up and shoots fireworks at Abyss from the air. Abyss fires back at him, and the exchange continues until we cut to the Helms Dynasty (who I guess I forgot were still in the match) coming after Matt with shovels, but then Hurricane shows up and stops them, and Matt says he's happy to see him back on the side of the light. Matt and Helms start shoveling dirt onto Lee and Everett, and Matt tells Helms that even the man with three H's would be proud of the way they buried the
Winners: The BROKEN Hardys
They talked about Jeff Hardy's rivalry with kangaroo Smoking Joe Frazier and the debut of King Maxel in the ring against Rockstar Spud from Total Nonstop Deletion....
Rockstar Spud interrupts, and Matt tells him he's a man worthy of deletion, but Spud says he's definitely not getting deleted tonight because he's sick of both of them, their gardener, their drone, his wife, and most of all his son getting all of his television time. He's a former two-time X Division Champion, a future World Champion, and he came down here to get his stinking kid gone. The fans in attendance chant for Maxel, and Spud says he's already more over than he's ever been. He's going to make that greenhorn a loser, and Matt asks Spud if he wants to be Maxel's first ever opponent, and Spud says he does, so as the all-powerful promoter of Total Nonstop Deletion, he can sanction that. Spud says he'll carry Maxel and make him look good so Matt can be like all other promoters and push him to the moon after he's gone. Matt asks a licensed official to come to the ring, and Matt tells the referee that this will be a no disqualification match. Matt tells everyone to stand and praise King Maxel!
Rockstar Spud vs King Maxel
Maxel covers Spud and the referee counts three.
Winner: King Maxel
The Hardys reminisce about the time the Nemeths paid them a visit at the Compound....
The Nemeths are in the car and are looking for The Hardy Compound. Willow the Wisp walks into the road and welcomes them to the compound. The Nemeths arrive at the compound and get out of the car. One of Matt Hardy’s sons welcomes them and guides them through the gates towards the compound. Ryan Nemeth thinks that The Nemeths should split up. Nic agrees.
Nic encounters Willow the Wisp again near the woods. Willow says that he sees dead people and then dances to “Not Like Us” by Kendrick Lamar. Willow drops his umbrella and disappears. Nic looks for him. Jeff Hardy attacks Nic and has the upper hand for a bit, but Nic gets away. Jeff catches up to him, but Nic throws him onto the bed of a truck. They fight on the truck. Jeff tries to powerbomb Nic off of the truck and through two tables, but Nic reverses and back body drops Jeff through the tables. Nic takes luggage out of the truck and goes through it. He takes one of the TNA World Tag Team Title belts and heads towards the house,
Nic opens a door to the house and enters it as Ryan is near the fountain. Matt Hardy attacks Ryan from behind as Nic walks through the game and trophy room. Nic takes the other TNA World Tag Team Title belt, which is on a weight alarm. Nic uses a dumbbell to replace the weight.
Matt stops beating up Ryan because he has a PREMONITION! He knows Nic has stolen the title belts. Ryan hits Matt and Matt fights back. Matt runs at Ryan and they both fall into the pool. While still in the pool, Ryan flashes to the game room with a ticket. He gives his ticket to Senor Benjamin and sits down with Matt’s sons to watch a silent film on Maxel the Great. In the film, Maxel the Great wrestles Ryan and wins! Senor Benjamin is emotional over the win.
Ryan flashes to having a therapy session with Matt’s other son Wolfie. Ryan tells Wolfie about when Nic got suspended and he got booed by everyone. Wolfie says that they were all Matt Hardy fans. Ryan used to wet the bed a lot. He used to fall off his bike a lot. Wolfie says that Ryan missed something in his childhood. Did he ever hug his parents? Ryan cries and says that he didn’t. Ryan thanks Dr. Wolfie for a great therapy session.
Ryan flashes to Reby and Eeevee, the Hardys’ daughter, playing the piano near the woods. Ryan says they are taking the titles. Eevee says they won’t! Ryan then becomes emo/goth as “Perfect” by Simple Plan plays. Emo/goth Ryan then has a roast battle with Bartie. It doesn’t go well for Ryan.
Back in the pool, Matt is about to drown Ryan until Nic shows up with the tag titles. Matt gets out of the pool and Nic runs. Maxel stops Nic long enough for Matt to catch up to Nic and fight him. Ryan arrives and hits Matt with one of the belts and rains down punches on him. Jeff/Brother Nero reappears and The Nemeths run away.
They then discussed the time The System invaded the Hardy Compound....
Earlier this week: The System did a promo. Eddie Edwards said he's been to the Hardy Compound before and bad things happen there but Moose wants to beat Hardy in front of his wife and kids. Alisha was trying to talk them out of it but Masha Slamovich showed and wanted to concentrate on the Tag Team titles. Alisha said they didn't have time for this and followed The System. The Hex told Masha this wasn't a good sign for their title reign.
The System arrived at the Hardy Compound. Eddie Edwards said he knows a way in and suggested they go around back. Off to the commercial we go...
When we returned, The System walked past some spooky artwork. Alisha wondered who did the art. Moose said it was surely Jeff. Brian Myers said not to say that name. Hardy told them they should have come through the front because they missed all his traps. He said he wanted to introduce them to his family and named them all. Moose didn't care and said he was going to kick Matt's ass in front of them all. He advanced but Matt said he just set off the traps of booby. Lots of fireworks and smoke.
Brian Myers was on the ground and found an action figure. It transported him to the Hardy's arcade room which was titled, STARCADE. Myers was tormented by Hardy's kid. He came across skeletons that were meant to represent his past guises and failures. A skeleton meant to be Edge speared him. One of Hardy's kids hit the legdrop off a ladder.
Eddie Edwards was lost in the woods where he came across Wolfgang. Wolfgang asked him if was The American Wolf. Eddie said that was behind him. Wolfgang pointed out the full moon behind him and I sh** you not, Eddie Edwards turned into a werewolf! Things that never would have happened to him in Pro Wrestling NOAH, for $100, Alex.
We went to Alisha Ewards who found her way to Reby Hardy and The Gothic Baby. Gothic Baby didn't want to get out of her way and used FORCE POWERS to shove Edwards down. That will probably end up with more Internet praise than the Acolyte at this rate.
Moose looked for Matt Hardy and found himself at Senor Benjamin's house. Benjamin was in a theater watching The Final Deletion. Moose was in Hardy's childhood home. He said Hardy was a weird dude. Hardy attacked him from behind and put him in a wheelchair, rolling it into a wall.
Alisha was in a guillotine and Reby dropped it down on her. MURDER in prime time?!?
Hardy tossed Moose into the Lake of Reincarnation. Moose came out dressed like he was still an NFL Player. Hardy said Moose has been reincarnated to his best version ever and he wants Moose to face him at the PPV in his best form. Moose said he wouldn't make it to the PPV but Vanguard-1 distracted him. Hardy went for the Twist of Fate and The System were teleported back outside the Compound.
The Hardys thanked everyone for tuning in and Matt passed along that he had a premonition that next year will be the biggest battle ever staged on The Hardy Compound....
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