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3/8 BEYOND WRESTLING SHAMROCK SLAM REPORT

Beyond Wrestling “Shamrock Slam” 

3/8/24 Boston, MA

Beyond debuts at the Harpoon Brewery St. Patrick’s Festival in front of what should be the largest crowd in promotion history. It’s a stacked card. The drink tickets are flowing. This strawberry shandy is excellent. WE HAVE A FULL ON OPENING PARADE??? People are chanting for bagpipes. Oh man, I can tell this is gonna be nuts. 

 Match 1: Dan Barry vs Ray Jaz

We’re playing off some Irish vs Italian stuff here. The crowd is soooooo loud booing Jaz. Dan Barry takes some early heat but Jaz is getting too worked up taunting the crowd. Ray Jaz dodges a moonsault but turns into a stunner for the clean three. This was a ridiculously hot opener. Are we gonna have the energy to sustain this all night? 

Winner: Dan Barry

 

Match 2: Evan Zalios Home Loan Specialist Battle Royale

Participants: Ichiban, BRG, Brother Greatness, Pedro Dones, Sammy Diaz, GAL, Jermaine Marbury, Gabe Skye, Dezmond Cole, Matt Quay, LSG, Steven Stetson, Danny Miles, Hammer Tunis, CPA, Ricky Smokes, Lucas Chase, Vinny Talotta, Mike Walker

It’s chaos. I’m not gonna TRY call this. So much going on everywhere. I’m personally sad that Brother Greatness went out early. It almost looks like The Stetson Ranch is going to own the title shot but Ichiban eliminates Stetson and Miles to get the IWTV title shot later in the night. Big pop but mannnnnnnn, Ichiban is gonna have to dig DEEP later tonight. Krule is Krule. 

Winner: Ichiban

Match 3: Big Business (Big Bacon Brad Hollister, TJ Crawford, Victor Chase & Julio Cruz) vs Mane Event (Midas Black & Jay Lyon) and Shook Crew (Bryce Donovan & Bobby Orlando)

Long babyface rally in the opening minutes, Bug Business is having a bad time. When they can’t get the advantage, this breaks down into a brawl…Mane & Shook just batter them. Mane Event goes for the Lion hoop spot but they wreck the hoop and send the circus boy colliding. Lyon gets caught up in a prolonged beatdown, aided by an easily distracted ref. Lyon with a corkscrew kick to the bricks gets Bobby in there! Bryce with a black hole slam alllllmost ends it. Midas with a double stomp splash off Bryce to Julio for two! Bacon hits the jackhammer to Bobby. Chokeslam to Bacon! Bacon catches Midas in a pop up and Big Business triple bombs him for the win.

Winner: Big Business

Match 4: Kennedi Hardcastle, Notorious Mimi & Allie Katch vs The Bratz (Shannon LaVangie & Paris Van Dale) and Ava Everett

The crowd energy is insane at this point. The heels get tripped up and triple 619’d! Huge pop for Allie hitting the ring. Ava tries to tempt Allie to her side since they have matching gear but of course it’s a trap. Ava taking her time with the beatdown but loses focus and Mimi gets the hot tag X factor and a step up dropkick to the bratz! The heels still playing that three on one to ground Mimi. Katch tags in but the bratz are ready for her. Kennedi with the blind tag and cross body. Katch with a superplex but Shannon hits a twisted bliss. Mimi and Paris trade before Kennedi blasts a knee. Ava tries to suplex Hardcastle but gets hit with a V trigger for the win! This was a blast.

Winners: Hardcastle, Mimi & Katch

Match 5: Love Doug vs Teddy Goodz & Sidney Bakabella

Doug doesn’t even take his wings off and cross bodies Goodz. Doug steals Sidney’s wig before Goodz can help. Bakabella feels real strong hitting a double axe handle but Doug reverses the wristlock and Sidney almost taps. Goodz is going to have to do the bulk of the work here, of course. Big spinning backbreaker to Doug. Sidney wants to stretch him? Doug hits him in the belly and he goes running for cover. Running bulldoug! Doug is about to love him but Goodz rakes the eyes. Doug with a a sunset flip…and Bakabella is pantsed…WHY is the only not-hairless part of him his a**??? Doug is going for the kill but a butt-exposed Sidney Buttkabella throws powder in his eyes and rolls him for the three. This was insane…or as Bakabella himself later put it “I exposed myself to 2400 people and didn’t get arrested”. 

Winner: Bakabella & Goodz

Match 6: Joey Janela vs Megan Bayne

I am blown away that this is a match happening in front of me. Joey gets absolutely smashed in the lockup. He wasn’t ready for that strength and he bows to the queen. Bayne just ragdolling him. This rules. Joey whipped corner to corner and he comes blasting out with a European uppercut that finally slows down Megasus. I get a word from Denver Colorado who is absolutely over the moon at the energy and just scale of this show. Bayne with a huge belly to belly suplex. Couple stinger splashes and a Michanoku driver for two! Stiff ddt and a hangman’s meteora leave Megasus hanging out of the ring. Spike dvd…kick out! Bayne powers free of a piledriver….Samoan drop! Joey with a snap German! Trading shots in the center. Both hitting clotheslines but neither go down…Joey crumbles in the third go. Fisherman’s suplexes! Joey fight. It gets turned inside out with a boot! Joey rana’s free of a powerbomb…Bayne flapjacks him! Back and forth they go! Huge double down as the crowd wild for Beyond Wrestling. They struggle to their feet, Joey comes running and caught right in a Boston crab! Joey in pain but gets the rope.  Erica’s suplex to the bad boy! She goes for the bow down….Joey tries to steal it. Bayne hits a swinging slam…she’s headed to fly…Joey gets the knees up on the splash. Package piledriver sucks the air out of the room…Bayne kicks out! We’re alive! They fight to the apron. Joey hits a suplex on the hardest part of the ring! Joey is preening…Bayne is up and Germans him into ring!!!! Kick out! Holy s***! Let’s steal the show. More trading. This is epic. Joey superkick! Another piledriver…Bayne is RIGHT UP! Holy hell. Big Clothesline. Running bulldog! Sitout powerbomb…Joey kicks out. She knows what she has to do…BOW DOWN TOMBSTONE PILEDRIVER! Joey is down for the three. My god. Joey is rattled and bows to the queen again and offers a handshake…he’s been beat tonight but he clearly wants a second round.

Winner: Megan Bayne

Match 7: Miracle Generation (Kylon King & Dustin Waller)(c) vs MxM (Mason & Mansoor)(for the IWTV tag team championships)

If any match could attempt to follow that last one, this could do it. MxM are freak athletes. Mason hits a ridiculous hart attack style leg lariat. Mansoor with a northern lights to Flash and Kylon is a little “hey now”. MxM with a crazy legdrop side slam combo. Flash is having a rough start to this contest. Ref Tyler swats away some cheating leverage, allowing Kylon to tag in and go wiiiiild. Kylon saves Austin from a chokeslam…tandem flip powerbomb for two on Mason! Mansoor tricks Kylon into eating a cutter from Dustin. This has been all go. Mason cuts him in half…huge double chokebomb on Dustin for two! Kylon with the save and Dustin almost rollups up Mansoor. Mason eats a cutter and German. Mansoor splash saves the pin! Let’s go wild! Mansoor says his knee just gave out. The ref is calling for help? They are helping Mansoor to the back…Mason with a double low blow! Nooooo. He blasts Kylon with the IWTV title belts and get the three. Ahhhhhhhhhhhhh!

Winners: MxM?

 

Rich Palladino is conferring with the ref…are we getting a reversal??? Ref Tyler knows what happened! Restart the match! Miracle Generation going wild after dodging a second belt shot…Powerplex to Mansoor for the three!!!! Excellently done swerve!

Real Winners and Still Champs: Miracle Generation

Rich Palladino brings up Denver Colorado to get his flowers in front of the biggest crowd in Beyond Wrestling history. This is nuts. We chant for Harpoon and Clown Shoed beer, who made this possible. We are going to a quick intermission. I need air. Holy hell. 

Match 8: Aaron Rourke vs Kris Statlander

Huge welcome home chants for Statlander. Rourke is enjoying these opening sequences until Statlander unloads some heavy chops. Rourke with the shotgun dropkick. Big back elbow and the Dimepiece is posing. Rourke getting those chops back. He licks the whole arm before missing a huge chop…but hits a spinning leg lariat and double chest chop. Big suplex for two! Rourke biting at the hand as he tries a fujiwara armbar. Statlander is trying to find an opening…Rourke is just energized by this crowd and taking it to her. She pushes off a frankensteiner…Michanoku driver for two! Kris is raging back but Rourke reverses and hits a damn big bang theory on her!!! Kris gets a boot up on a moonsault. Discus lariat! Cradle tombstone for the win!!! This was sick. Crowd is VERY alive for this.

Winner: Kris Statlander 

 

Match 9: Willow Nightingale & Rex Lawless vs Dirty Bulk Bronson & Gabby Forza

Willow is allllll about this couple’s fight. Bronson can’t stop staring at Rex’s pecs. He wants to squeeze them…but Rex would rather pop on a headlock. Bronson gets the arms locked and motorboats the big man! Willow and Gabby in to test their power. Rex and Bronson try to use their legs to give their ladies extra power but it’s a stalemate. Rex with a huge running boot to Bronson! Kick out. Willow and Rex pummeling Bronson but they get too invested in giving each other a smooch and Gabby gets in there. Huge powerslam to Willow. Bronson with a cannonball. Vader splash from Gnomie! Willow kicks out! Willow and Gabby hit stereo AA’s on the guys! Rex and Lawless trading big meaty shots. Bronson with a pop up bomb! Bronson throws Rex into a spear from Gabby! Kick out! Rex escapes a second kill shot…uranage backbreaker to Bronson! Gabby reverses a suplex and hits one on Rex! Willow and Gabby are winded and trading holds…Willow with a pounce!!!! Huge doctor bomb from Willow to Gabby for the win!

Winners: Rex & Willow

after the match, the crowd is popping for both teams and Bronson gets to do another motorboat on Rex. This was nuts.

 

Match 10: Krule(c) vs Ichiban (for the IWTV independent wrestling championship)

Ichiban won that battle royale. He has the Church of Greatness in his corner (metaphorically…they aren’t actually out here). Can the former Wrestling Open champion defeat the Atrocity? I love that they just added Alec Price’s “disputed” title reign to the length of Krule’s. Ichiban is trying to be speedy. He’s flying around but he just can’t hit anything that realllly hurts the monster. Ichiban with a good cannonball off the apron but Krule just slams him into the apron. Huge frying pan hand chop to Ichiban. Ichiban throwing hands to the abs…dropkick to the knee and gets a two on a crucifix pin! He tries to put on a sleeper. Krule powers out on the rope. Huge inverted suplex sends Ichiban crashing to earth. Ichiban is limp on the canvas but Krule isn’t going for the pin. Ichiban hits a back standing code red for two! Missile dropkick drops the monster! He tries the Ichiban Kai…Krule is flattened! Ichiban can’t get to the pin. Krule sits up. He flips Ichiban inside out with a chokeslam. He steps on the pin, ICHIBAN KICKS OUT!!! Tornado ddt for a razor thing two! He goes for a super Ichiban Kai…Krule catches him out of the air with a chokebreaker and hits Scorched Earth for the win. I’ve been very into this run of matches lately that have really pushed Krule’s limits. Ichiban struggles to his feet and stands before the champ…Krule isn’t a a handshake kind of monster and he chokeslams Ichiban for good measure before exiting through a booing crowd. Awesome.

Winner: Krule

 

Main Event: Alec Price vs Matt Cardona (w/ Smart Mark Sterling & VSK & JGeorge)

Price is hungry to take down the self-proclaimed Indy god. Cardona wouldn’t NOT grab the mic and run down the crowd, the city and his opponent. Ring the bell and Cardona immediately runs for the floor. Cardona tries a dirty gut kick but Price is flipping and flying. VSK distracts and eats a knee. Sterling pulls Cardona out of harms way and Price eats a huge lariat. Price cannot get any momentum. The Indy God just has too many stooges to keep this very unfair. The ref finally gets wise to the rampant cheating and throws VSK & Sterling out! Big pop! Price almost steals the rollup! Pop up into a dropkick! Rebound lariat! Triple knees! Tornado ddt! Cardona kicks out! Price to the top but Matt shoves the ref into the ropes and crotches Price on the buckles. Cardona tries to follow but Price traps him and lands a pair of top rope stomps in the tree of woe. He sets up the SuPrize kick but Cardona again shoves the ref into Price. It’s enough to get a blatant throat chop in. Cardona with a AA for two! Cardona sent flying into the ref. Price hits the Suprize kick! He should have like a 12 count here but Sterling and VSK hit the ring again. Price with a step up stomp to VSK! Rana to Sterling! Cardona with a heavy shot from the Internet championship belt! Ref Tyler is awake and makes the count….kick out! Price with a disaster kick! Cardona with a buckle bomb and rough Ryder! Price kicks out! Crowd is on fire as Cardona tries to come charging but is sent flying to the floor. Price hits a huge dive onto everyone! Slingshot clothesline m back into the ring…Sterling pulls the ref out! The shenanigans are strong as Cardona uppercuts Price in the crotch. They set up price again…but VSK eats the Rough Ryder! Sterling takes a Belt shot! Blockbusssstah! Suuuuuprize kick! Price gets the three finally!!!!

Winner: Alec Price

Cardona pulls him down from celebrating and offers a handshake…it’s legit. Cardona is truly impressed by the northeast beast. Holy hell this show was wild. I said to someone “This show just out Americanrana’d Americanrana. I mean it. This was the same wild energy I remember from the Fete Music shows of old….but just on such a larger scale. If this was a once in a lifetime event, damn. This was a good one. But maybe we do this again next year? Harpoon had to be loving the turnout. Certainly, the 2k people in attendance had a great time. I honestly can’t wait to watch this one back when it hits IWTV sometime soon.

 

 

 

 

 

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