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6/10 WRESTLING OPEN 'HOT DOG & A HANDSHAKE' LIVE REPORT

Wrestling Open “Hot Dog & A Handshake”

6/10/23 - Ralph’s Rock Diner - Worcester, MA

Ok so…there was a Hot Dog Eating competition before this show. It was MOSTLY legit and definitely included a heel character stuffing hotdogs down his shirt and trying to claim he ate 51 dogs in 10 min. The winner ate…26, I think. It was pretty funny overall but they definitely needed a longer presentation to make this an EVENT -> cue Wrestling Open bringing their ring and a rather wacky card of matches (AND some debuts) to the parking lot at Ralph’s Rock Diner. You ever see “From Dusk Till Dawn”?  My first time coming to this place, I thought I was pulling up on a real life version T**** Twister. All it was missing was Cheech Marin out front. Anyways, this venue is a staple rock club in Worcester and it’s awesome to see Open get a shot at exposure to a new venue (and a rather packed space since the hot dog crowd is clearly sticking around for this)

Match 1: Cheeseburger vs “The Rabid Honey Badger” Ryan Mooney 

Seeing as this was a hotdog show, Cheeseburger should be the biggest heel at Ralph’s today. Or maybe Mooney is, seeing as he wants to eat this Cheeseburger. Yep, Mooney’s the heel. Mooney begging for a bite. Just a taste. Chomp chomp. CB just working hit arm over as Mooney is getting frustrated. Quick reversal in the ropes, Ryan is bringing out those honey Badger claws. Flying European uppercut to the back of the head. Mooney steals CB’s cowboy hat….and he takes a bite. Mooney demands that CB be disqualified since he doesn’t even TASTE like a burger. Mooney trying to come off the ropes…CB slow rolls out and gets the feet up. Mooney eats some shots, hit a big dvd for two! Crowd very much for CB. CB with a short superkick…he winds up and the palm strike connects for the three!

Winner: Cheeseburger

Match 2: Restless (Miles Penn & Ryan Ryzz) vs Lost Boys (Athan Promise & Juni Underwood)

Restless swarming early but Lost Boys are running through some smooth tags…Miles drops both Boys. Promise taking a beating, big tosses from Miles as Ryan just seethes on the apron. Ryan in and he’s just ruthless. Juni baited and Promise getting stomped out. Athan is isolated for a while and taking the heat. Huge crack of an enziguri, Juni is in! Ryan tries to go to the eyes and throat, Miles just in to finish the job…Juni with a show stopper! Lost Boys cants put Miles away. Restless swarms again…Pop up roundhouse to Juni! Uranage backbreaker and flatliner to Promise…kick out! Restles with a slam And dive but Juni breaks it up. Ryan eats a pop up backcracker head kick combo and stays down!

Winners: Lost Boys

Match 3: Chico Adams vs Armani Kayos

This is a weird universe where Armani Kayos is a face? Well, Chico is just…THAT unlikeable. Chico is a raging animal and Kayos just eats him up with his creative offense. Chico grinds Kayos’ eyes across the ropes and gets stomping. Chico won’t stop yelling and screaming and slamming. Kayos with the reversal, big kicks. Wheelbarrow slingshot into the buckles! Sliced bread! Kick out! Kayos with a rollup but Chico reverses it and holds Armani down for the three. Booooo!

Winner: Chico Adams
 

Match 4: Mutually Assured Destruction (Rip Byson & Perry Von Vicious w/ Delmi Exo) vs Hispanic Mechanics (Jos A & Jos B) 

This is just gonna be a goofy delight of a match. B is just freaking Rip out with all his swerving and grinding. Perry keeps having to bring Rio back to earth, as he keeps getting lost in the magic of their hips. Perry gets lost in the dance and Delmi tries to save them..Delmi gets caught! Ref Bill gets caught! This is amazing. Perry and Rip finally get into beating down the Mechanics. Huge delay slam on A…Rip tossed into him for two. Delmi gets some shots in too…MAD just brutalizing A…double shoulder block for two! A rolls away from elbow drops…tag to B! Rip getting run over! Big slam! Vader splash! Delmi puts Rip’s foot on the rope! She’s caught and Ref Bill throws her out! Perry hits a powerbomb in the chaos..:A makes the pin break! He saves B from a double chokeslam and they hit A2B for the win!

Winner: Hispanic Mechanics

Match 5: Blair Onyx vs Kaia McKenna

A witch fighting a spider! XD The Arachnakid is giving Kaia the willies early. Kaia with some early control of the head and arm. Onyx with some good displays of flexibility but Kaia is running her over. Big knees and a running bulldog. Kick out. Onyx wants a timeout! Hard back elbow into the corner and Onyx hits a sliding lariat for two. Onyx gets the hair…Kaia fires up, arm drag and a boot! Thez press and raining blows! Kaia threatens to rip all the legs off this spider as she twists at her neck. Onyx off the ropes and hits a running shoulder block for the win. Kind of sudden…I like both these ladies so I’d like to definitely see a harder hitting round 2 down the road. 

Winner: Kaia McKenna

Match 6: Church of Greatness (Brother Greatness & Brother Greatness) vs The Haven (Shawn Knyte and Jay Onyx)

This is great. Knyte in a flex off with BG early. Greatness tries to ambush him but Shawn makes him pray to god. The Haven are just having their way with the wrestling Christian but this is just delightful. Backdrop splash and lionsault combo for two. Tyree is just locked up in his corner and BG is living the book of Job. Tyree finally kicks Knyte off the buckles and Brother is getting some shots…and the big man in. Taylor steamrolls Knyte as Onyx is helpless on the corner. BG and Taylor tagging back on forth, Knyte is trying to get away but Greatness pulls Onyx off the apron. Ref Bill finally stops the cheating and Shawn spikes Tyree into the mat. BG tries to stop it but Onyx is in and on fire! Tyree dropped and takes kick after kick! BG eats a pop up corkscrew splash! Tyreee breaks up the pin, Haven is in trouble but they send Tyree out…they go for the finish, Tyree catches Onyx’s foot…Shawn powerbombed into the mat hard and BG snags the pin with a prayer.

Winners: Church of Greatness 

Match 7: CPA vs JGeorge

This is just wonderful. A lot of people here have never the magic of CPA before. JGeorge is trying to fake the ref out that CPa is cheating. He’s bad at it. Very bad. CPA pulls off a shirt. JGeorge finally hits a stunner off the apron….JGeorge trying to use the tie as a weapon! Those chops are weeeeeeak! Running leg drop for two! CPA dodges a very telegraphed jGeorge’s elbow. Form 1099! Diving kick! JGeorge has a knife?!? A plastic knife! He threatens to kill ref Tyler?!? We have a hostage situation! CPA knows how to diffuse this…a singalong of “Jumper”?!? It works! Form 1099! JGeroge tries to stab CPA and Gets jackknife pinned for the win! 

Winner: CPA

Main Event: Hot Dog Starkes vs Casanova Valentine

This is going to be a wild s***show. Starkes IS a hot dog so he wants his handshake, his HAND comes off (it’s a Mickey Mouse glove) and he slaps him with it! Starkes is unloading and takes Valentine through the crowd. He sabu’s him with a chair! Casanova’s entourage are upset he’s losing to a hot dog! We got thumbtack bats! They blast each other! Time to clink glasses and sit into this bar fight! Slapping the beer out of each others mouths. Valentine blinds him and spikes him into  a chair! That hold that pose for a solid 30-45 sec. Wow. We got a bag of random plunder. It’s…paper plates?!? Casa throws him into a security barrel! He attacks him with serving tongs! Starkes gets them away and twists his d*** with ‘em! We got a tray of hot dogs! Valentine hits a rock bottom into them! Kick out! Starkes with a stunner! He pulls a hot dog out of his Fanny pack and stuffs it in Valentine’s mouth. Another stunner and Valentine stays down! This was stupid…but the right kind of stupid for a wrestling show held after a hot dog eating competition done in the parking lot of a rock club that is basically two venues and a diner car glued together with the grave of the owner in the front bushes. This wasn’t the same level of faux-deathmatch absurdity as the infamous “Life Match” Beyond did with Dick Justice and Johnny C***strong…but it was just right for a venue that wanted a fun show and PROBABLY didn’t want to see Satan C*** getting swung around…even though that would be fully accepted by the crowd of Worcester, MA.

Winner: Hot Dog Starkes 

 

 

Stupidly fun show. I’m sunburned and tired. Time to sleep. See you Thursday.

 

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