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GCW EMO FIGHT REPORT FROM LOS ANGELES

GCW “Emo Fight”

4/1/23 FITE+

Emo Fight is starting later than planned so it’s technically April now! Veda Scott and Jordan Castle are on commentary! It’s 3:30am on the East Coast! I AM AWAKE LET’S DO THIS!

Match 1: Jimmy Lloyd vs Starboy Charlie vs Sonico vs Matt Vandergriff vs B-Boy vs Sawyer Wreck

I see the gimmick of this show now. Everyone is in dark gear, eye makeup and generally sulking and brooding in whatever corner they can find. All themes are just late early 2000’s rock anthems and I’m Glad I stayed awake for whatever the hell this is gonna be. Starboy Charlie asks a fan to lift him onto the apron. Lol. Ring the bell. B-Boy is just hanging in the front row. Sonico and “SADBOI CHARLIE” start fighting while everyone else just impassively watches this go on. Vandergriff launches into a spear on Charlie. Sawyer and Jimmy get into the scramble and B-boy decides it’s fine to join the match. Jimmy throwing hands but Emo B-Boy is just sad about getting hit. But then he hits an ace crusher and sends him out. Charlie launches himself out to B-Boy. Vandergriff comes flying too. Jimmy lost for what to do, takes it to Wreck as B-Boy walks around the ring and just slaps and eye pokes everyone in the match. This finally picks up pace and everyone gets into the fight a little more. Maybe there’s a reason to care? B-boy drills Starboy with a brain buster, Sawyer catches him with a choke slam. Sonico mists her! Springboard shoulder block to Charlie! Sonic with a dive through the ropes and right back in with a double knees. Vandergriff tries to cut the fire off….tower of doom! Buckle bomb to Sonico! 450 splash and Vandergriff takes it.

Winner: Matt Vandergriff

Jordan and Veda say we’re getting MUSICAL PERFORMANCES in between the matches?? This is Lil’ Aaron for the first segment. Sounds like he is singing to a backing track with a guitarist in the mix. This is a bizarre experience.

Match 2: Brooke Havok vs Janai Kai vs Sandra Moone 

Wow…Jania Kai is just….wow. like B-Boy, she just chills off to the side while the more excitable Moone and Havok puts her hood up and goes into her zone. They try to stomp her out and Kai just hits the ropes and sits forever. Janai does NOT want to wrestle but is finally forced into action. Pulling Moone into the buckles and drops an elbow on Havok. Kai impassively stays in this fight, hood up, almost annoyed that someone wants her to do stuff. Havok tosses Moone, pulls Kai up and she gets her legs kicked out. Janai drops the hood, wraps on a dragon sleeper and Havok passes out. Janai pulls out her phone for a post-match selfie. This was fun. I guess. Whatever. Rawr.

Winner: Janai Kai

 

Horse Head is up for the next musical performance, he too is singing solo in the ring. The crowd is being polite about it, couple of nodding heads. I pray to never be in this situation myself as a performer. But I always can respect people who can stand in front of people like this. 

Match 3: Kevin Blackwood vs Jimmy Jacobs

I didn’t know I needed this match tonight (this AM) but here we are. They fight over a hippos and Blackwood winds up on the floor. This has picked up the pace right off the bat. Crowd is pretty hot for Jacobs but the Blackwood faithful start to make their presence known. Jacobs with a rana and clotheslines Kevin back to the floor. Jacobs comes running and Kevin kicks him in the face. Blackwood starting to fire back, big power bomb for two. Jacobs tries to put him away with a tornado suplex into a dragon sleeper. Blackwood escapes…stunner! Snap suplex in to the buckles! Kevin hits the top rope stomp! Kick out! Do we have a tombstone coming? Kevin blasts him in the face. Jacobs catches an ace crusher out of the air! Sliced bread for two! The guillotine is locked back in! Kevin tries to steal it with a flip and bridge, kick out! Slow chops and strikes back and forth in the center. Blackwood lands a good headlock but Jacobs hits a super kick. Jacobs tries the sliced bread again…REVERSAL INTO A TOMSTONE!!! Jacobs kicks out! Kevin sets up a door, they start scrambling to not be the one who eats the wood. Jacobs tries a slingshot spear but he gets ddt’d! Hangman’s stomp. Kevin dvd’s him through the door. Jimmy kicks out! Kevin unloads a hard shot of door that Jacobs head goes through. He should be dead! Kick out! Jacobs is putting on a war for this rare match. Kevin trying to get a superplex….Jacobs hits a ddt off the ropes! Right back into the guillotine! Blackwood taps out! This was really good. Might have to watch this back when I’m completely coherent and it’s not 4something-am lol.

Winner: Jimmy Jacobs

 It’s performance time. Wicca Phase is introduced as the final performer. This place has a stage, they should just have set the performers up on there. I don’t like this backing tracks, just the vocalist in the ring thing. 

Main Event: Wasted Youth (Dyln McKay & Marcus Mathers) vs Los Macizos (Ciclope & Miedo Xtremo) vs  Moonlight Express (SpeedBall Mike Bailey & MAO Chemical Romance)

McKay looks about the same but Mathers is just so sadboi looking and singing along to If It Means A Lot to You. With four matches total, everyone is milking the s*** out of these entrances. Los Macizos are just so amazingly sulky. They are accused of being fake emo. Mao kicks off a Blink-182 singalong and Macizos can’t keep up. THEY’RE POSERS?!? Ciclope and Miedo have dives and hard hits for the sulky bois. Speedball gets popped up in a surfboard stretch. Mao saves his partner with a pin attempt and Moonlight Express starts to unload on Macizos. Mathers and McKay have some flippy s*** for Speedball. Marcus with a northern lights for two. Mao in to break it up but Wasted Youth catch him with a moonysault backstabber combo. Heavy spine busters to Wasted Youth from Los Macizos as they try to reestablish their dominance in the GCQ tag scene. Fight to the floor, Moonlight Express with a BUDDYSAULT to the floor. They try to get Mathers up for a straight jacket slam but Mathers hits a code red on Mao. Dylan hit a shooting star. 450 from Mathers on Mao but Ciclope dives in to save the pin. Macizos put up Mathers for a press slam to a power bomb. Ciclope to the top…Mao pulls him down…..450 whiffs….Speedball with the tornado kick to Mathers. Ultima Weapon to Mathers. Mao dives to everyone else…..Dyln saves the pin but he’s left alone to be rocked by Moonlight Express and they put him away with a straight jacket driver. Moonlight Express wins!

Winners: Moonlight Express
 

On the whole, I dug this show. I definitely have some thoughts on the music performance limitations but I’m sure there were some backing bands saying “what do you mean I don’t get to play on camera?”. The show itself had the kind of Fever Dream vibe that I just said I felt was lacking in the Previous Spring Break show. This show WAS weird and goofy at times but also had a few bonkers matches. So you should watch it. Or don’t. Whatever. <sips coffee> Poser. 

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