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MLW UNDERGROUND REPORT: STREET FIGHT, AND MORE

By Richard Trionfo on 2023-02-14 23:01:00

Your announcers are Matt Striker and Joe Dombrowski.

We begin with a video package setting up tonight’s street fight between Mance Warner and Real1.

Mance says tonight Mance is going to do what he does. He is going to beat up people. We will see how real Real1 is. Mance says that he represents everyone and everyone hates your f***ing guts. You can dance and run around but I will put my fist down your throat. I don’t care about anything other than spilling your blood.

Joe and Matt run through the card for tonight.

We go to Sam Leterna with Jacob Fatu and Juicy Finau.

Sam asks where is Lance and Jacob says he pulled that move again. Jacob says Lance is running late. Juicy says Lance will be here.

Sam asks Jacob about his match against Alex Hammerstone and how will he deal with Hammerstone after losing the first time.

Jacob says Philadelphia is home and that belt rightfully belongs with him. He says he has family and he has nothing but the best supporting him. That belt is coming back home where it belongs.

Match Number One: Calvin Tankman versus Willie Mack

They lock up and Mack with a side head lock. Mack with a shoulder tackle but Calvin does not move. Mack tells Calvin to try and he goes for a shoulder tackle but Mack stays on his feet. Mack decides to go again and he cannot get Calvin off his feet. Mack cannot get Calvin down after another shoulder tackle attempt. Calvin with chops and forearms. Mack with an Irish whip and Calvin floats over. Mack with a clothesline and Calvin misses a cross body.

Mack with a head scissors and drop kick. Calvin goes to the floor and Mack with a flip dive onto Calvin. Mack with a punch and chop in the corner. Mack with a nipple twist and Calvin with chops. Calvin ties up Mack in the chair and goes for the nipples. Calvin with chops and forearm. Mack with a jumping round kick for a near fall. Calvin with a punch and chop. Mack with punches to Calvin. Mack with a clothesline and Calvin stays on his feet. Mack with another clothesline and Calvin stays on his feet. Mack with a flying clothesline and both men are down.

We go to commercial.

We are back and Mack with a punch and Calvin with a pop up spinning back fist for a near fall. Calvin with forearms and Mack fires back. Calvin with a head butt and he tries for a suplex but Mack gets to his feet. Mack with a spinning heel kick and he gets Calvin up for a Samoan drop. Mack gets to his feet first and hits a standing moonsault for a near fall. Mack asks the referee if he is right about the two count. Mack pulls Calvin into position as Mack goes up top and goes for a frog splash but Calvin moves. Calvin with a running shoulder tackle.

Calvin with a back fist to the back of the head followed by the Tankman Driver for the three count.

Winner: Calvin Tankman

We go to a video from the unknown assailant and we are told that the three way women’s match announced for tonight has been canceled.

Real1 tells Mance Warner everybody knows that it was a cheap shot. He says he has brass balls while Warner has aluminum ones. Do you think you got lucky? Mance, you are what happens when two slobs in the south meet in a pro life state. He calls Warner inbred.

We go to highlights from last week’s main event.

Alex Hammerstone says Jacob is cashing in that ticket, just like he cashed in on Jacob. If you win, I guess I will win Battle Riot to cash in again. We are destined to do this. It always comes back to me and you. We are destined to fight forever. We have to go even bigger the next time. When I beat you, there are a couple fans who said the thing. They said they thought Hammer got lucky. You think I got lucky.

Alex says there are times where he thinks he might have gotten lucky. He can tell that voice to shut up while he enjoys his time at the top of the mountain. Alex says he listened and wondered if he got lucky. Luck is for someone who hasn’t earned it. If you didn’t think this rematch was coming, you are wrong. I know you are coming because you thought I got lucky. It is time to shut you up and shut up any doubters. I didn’t get lucky and I am going to beat you because I am better than you.

Next week, YAMATO faces Alex Hammerstone.

Match Number Two: Zoey Skye versus Taya Valkyrie (with Cesar Duran) for the MLW Featherweight Championship)

Taya pats Zoey ion the head because she is smaller and Zoey pushes back and hits a head scissors take down followed by an enzuigiri. Zoey misses a splash into the corner but kicks Taya. Taya puts Zoey in the ropes and hits a DDT. Taya sends Zoey to the floor. Taya sends Zoey into the ring post. Taya sends Zoey face first into the ring post.

We go to commercial.
We are back and Taya with a drop toe hold. Zoey with kicks to Taya followed by a chop. Taya with a leg sweep and a curb stomp as we see more people down in the back with the attacker’s calling card on their torsos.

Taya goes to the apron and Zoey with a Codebreaker in the ropes followed by a missile drop kick. Zoey with a cross body for a near fall. Zoey goes to the turnbuckles again and misses a splash. Taya with a drop kick and Road to Valhalla for the three count.

Winner: Taya Valkyrie (retains championship)

After the match, Cesar has Zoey kiss Taya’s boot.

Sam Leterna is with Billie Starkz on the stage.

She asks Billie about her goals in MLW.

Billie says she hopes to make an exciting debut.

Taya Valkyrie shows up and says its another one. She asks if Billie’s mom is in the parking lot.

Cesar calls Billie a child and tells Billie to come back when she is out of diapers.

Alex Kane is with Mr. Thomas and they talk about the bulldogs and Thomas wants to know if he is talking about the dogs or the team. Alex says the Opera Cup is all that matters. Alex wonders what can he do with the Opera Cup.

Sam is with Davey Boy Smith Jr. and the Billingtons.

Davey says it has been two years since he has been in an MLW ring. He brought back some of his family. He says you are looking at Team Bulldog and the past, present, and future of professional wrestling.

Sam asks about Alex stealing the Opera Cup.

Davey says he finds it quite insulting and he is disgusted. Alex thinks this is a joke. This dates back to 1915 when his grandfather won the first Opera Cup. You think this is funny, but I take this personal. You call yourself the greatest shooter, but there will be no joking when you step in the ring with him. Davey reminds Alex to tap before he naps.

We see EJ Nduka attacking Lance Anoa’i from behind with a cinder block and he tells Lance to give Jacob a message to never get in his way.

We go to commercial.

We are back and Sam is with Lio Rush. She asks him what does he want to achieve this time in MLW. Lio says he is going to prove to everyone who he is. A lot of things happened since he was away. A lot of people think they are on top and that is not the case. It is time for the entire roster to find out.

Before our next match, Real1 has some comments for the crowd.

He says everybody knows you can’t spell Mance without ‘man’ but there is no man in Mance. He says Mance is a female dog. He calls him a bitch, like his sister and cousin. He says he hopes Mance’s mother is in the front row to hear Mance says uncle, just like his mother.

Match Number Three: Real1 versus Mance Warner in a Street Fight

Real1 with a drop kick and he punches Mance in the corner. Mance with a back elbow and chop. Mance sends Ral1 into the turnbuckles and Mance sends him into a different turnbuckle. Mance has a few more so he sends Real1 into a different turnbuckle. Mance sends Real1 to the floor and Mance goes to the apron for a thumb to the eye. They return to the ring and Real1 rolls to the floor. Mance follows. Real1 sends Mance into the guardrail.

Real1 drops Mance on the guardrail and Real1with a Razor’s Edge into the ring post.

We go to commercial.

We are back and Real1 with a sleeper but Mance does not let his arm go down a third time. Real1 gets a kendo stick but drops it. Mance stays in his chair while Real1 picks it up and hits Mance. Real1 winds up and misses with the kendo stick. Mance with jabs and a Bionic elbow and he sends Real1 face first into the chair. Mance hits Real1 a few times with the kendo stick and follows with a clothesline and boot. Mance grabs the trash can. Real1 backs Mance into the corner and connects with shoulders. Real1 goes to the turnbuckles and he comes off the turnbuckles into the trash can. Real1 pulls the referee in front of Mance and the distraction allows Real1 to hit Mance with brass knuckles for the three count.

Winner: Real1

We see the unknown attacker’s graphic as we go to credits.

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