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I am heartbroken to announce the passing of my mother, Diane Johnson, yesterday at the age of 68 after a long and hard battle against COPD and emphysema.
Obviously, I will be taking some time away from the site this week to deal with this and I thank you all for your understanding.
My mother and my father, Michael, were married for 48 years, so the idea of them now apart is a reality I just can't wrap my head around at this moment. They met at a now-closed pub, The Shannon Inn in Flushing, NY, were the first couple to get married in the new church that opened across the street at the time, St. John's Vianney, and then moved into an apartment around the corner, where just three weeks into being married, they found out they were having a honeymoon baby - me! He was 21 and she was 20.
My brother and my sister were soon to follow and if I am going to be honest, it wasn't always an easy life. Like any blue-collar family, we had times when things were great and times the electricity was turned off, but through it all, she and my dad did their best to raise us.
My Mom put herself through nursing school as she and my father raised three children and until her health issues forced her into retirement, she was extremely proud of her work, especially a period of time where she specialized in working with oncology patients at Flushing Hospital.
The day she graduated was one of the happiest days of her life and I can still remember pretty much the entire day vividly, from her singing that morning to her walking the stage to the big party Queensborough College threw for the graduates to going to eat at an IHOP with my Uncle Frankie afterwards. She was so proud and she had ever reason to be.
My mom was a spitfire, for lack of a better word. If she thought someone was slighting her children, a path of destruction was left behind and I can still see the dazed looks on teachers and principals' faces from when she learned there was an issue and arrived, voice raised, finger pointing, with all the anger and might of the Death Star.
God help the person she thought wronged our family, to the point that even my father, who you never wanted to see angry because that meant all hell was about to break loose, would have to be the voice of reason. Needless to say, you didn't want to end up in her cross-hairs.
My Mom could be the most loving person in the world, but she also had that old school Brooklyn in her in that she could literally rip someone to shreds verbally if she felt the need - and trust me, even her own children felt the brunt of that power more often than we'd ever care to admit.
The last several years had not been kind to her, health-wise, so I have some relief in knowing she is no longer in pain, but, it's still my mom. This has been absolutely awful to wrap my head around, especially looking back at how much time was lost due to the COVID lockdown and knowing how much she cherished being a grandmother but just didn't have the ability from a physical, health standpoint to be the one that she truly wanted to be.
I knew what the end result was going to be here but life can be so cruel in its timing and this was one of the cruelest days of my life. The timing of this was absolutely unfair and horrible, given what we had all just been through with my father and getting him back on his feet. Now, he's alone, after an entire adulthood of being with my mom. That and knowing all my nieces and nephews lost their grandmother, really just breaks my heart.
I appreciate those who have reached out but I am still processing and I will likely not be responding at this time. The idea of talking about my mother in the past tense feels hurtful and disrespectful but unfortunately, that's the reality my family and I will now live in for the rest of my own life.
I appreciate your understanding and support but I'm going to go focus on my family now and somehow, try to get through this. I have no idea when I will be back to normal, because as of yesterday, normal no longer exists and it never will again.
Thank you.
Mike
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