PWInsider - WWE News, Wrestling News, WWE

4/1 GCW JOEY JANELA'S SPRING BREAK PART 2 REPORT FROM DALLAS, TX

GCW - Joey Janela’s Spring Break 6, Part 2 “The Greatest ClusterF***”

4/1/22 - Dallas, TX

Streaming on FITE.tv

A grumpy Joey Janela is mad that he didn’t get his accolades and flowers for beating Xpac last night. He says that every year, Spring Break has become less of his original vision…and it needs a LETHAL DOSE OF POISON. what is that poison? Janela himself! He will enter himself into the Clusterf*** and kill it once and for all. Dave Prazak and Kevin Gill are on commentary. Emil Jay is your announcer, let’s go!

Match 1: Matt Cardona (w/ Chelsea Green) vs Chris Dickinson (w/ Missy Hyatt)

Cardona is wearing his “king of the deathmatch” royal crown. The crowd hates him and cannot wait for Dirty Daddy to take his head off. Green does a good Queen Sharmell. They run down the town and GCW, they are too good to be there. He should be at the Hall of Fame with his buddy Undertaker. He dares Dickinson to get out here now. Dickinson does and Cardona seems way more worried now. Cardona gives Chelsea a kiss and dares Dickinson do the same to Missy. Missy sucks the soul of the Dirty Daddy out of his lips. Cardona can’t stop yelling at Missy and Dickinson pummels him for getting distracted. Dickinson wants an armbar. Cardona wants no part of it and tries to walk out. The crowd jeers him back in there, Green distracts Dickinson and Cardona takes control. He chokes Dickinson with his wrist tape. Green choking Dickinson and Missy isn’t being much of a neutralizer here. Cardona grabs a door and Spider-Man’s the fans. Dickinson backdrops Cardona through the door! Cardona firing back with forearms but Dickinson has hard lariats. Brain buster! Kick out! Green grabs the leg of Dickinson and Cardona hits a spear for two! He wants a Broski boot and Missy pulls the leg. Green comes in and fights with Missy! DVD from Dickinson! Kick out! Green took Missy’s bag. Where’s Missy? Cardona hits a low blow and a rough Ryder…Dickinson kicks out. Green swings the bag, Cardona takes the hit! Lariat to Green! Pazuzu bomb to Cardona! Dickinson stacks them both and gets the pin! How big was the brick in that Gucci bag?!?!

Winner: Chris Dickinson

Match 2: Tony Deppen vs Biff Busick

Deppen is a madman and very much wants this fight. The test each other in the graps early, Deppen scrambling for the choke repeatedly. Busick gets the advantage and Deppen opts to grab the rope. Deppen takes off his feet with a shoulder block and they get to trading chops. Deppen is not faring well with this shots. Busick accidentally chops the post, Deppen stomps out the hand! Deppen off the top…into a European uppercut! Busick with a neckbreaker and tries to squeeze the air out of Deppen’s head. Busick holds the face and slaps the soul out of Deppen. Tony seems to like this and gives shots right back! Tony with a combo of fast kicks, sweeps and knees. Two count! Biff firing up, drops Deppen on his head, huge uppercut for two! Biff wants a German off the top! Deppen fights free but misses his dive. Biff sent to the floor. Suicide headbutt to the outside! Double stomp from the top for two! These two madman are head to head and trading shots. Deppen kicks out the leg and kicks out the arm! Deppen jumps in with a standing kimura, Busick falls into a rope break. Back and forth chops and slaps! Busick hitting Europeans….Deppen with a snap German and a running knee to the face wins the match! Huge upset! What a win!

Winner: Tony Deppen 

Deppen grabs the mic and says it was an honor to have this match…but he just proved how good he is. Anyone who disagrees…can kiss his ass.

Match 3: Jordan Oliver vs “Speedball” Mike Bailey

Oliver is replacing PCO tonight. I hope he’s okay! This turns right into a brawl of back and forth shots! Oliver catches a leg on a leapfrog, Bailey sent out and Oliver dives right after!  This goes right into the crowd and chairs. Double knees off a chair to Oliver! Speedball with a huge chest kick for two. Double knees! Kick out! Oliver getting up and Bailey drops him repeatedly. Slap battle, Bailey crumbles

Oliver with a kick. Oliver staggers Bailey with a kick and release German…sitout powerbomb for two! Trading kicks and slaps on the apron! Bailey with a moonsault double knees on the apron! Bailey misses the follow up. Bailey with a kick combo! Trading pin attempts! Bailey with a KO kick…Oliver kicks out! Bailey tries a shooting star but falls into a cutter. Oliver hits another! Kick out! Bailey with another corner kick and finishes Oliver with a one winged Angel. Unexpected match but damn this was a LOT of fun.

Winner: Speedball Mike Bailey 

We get an Effy promo…Minoru Suzuki Has to enter Effy’s world tonight. And after that, maybe Effy can get a shot at Mox and the GCW World Title.

Match 4: Minoru Suzuki vs Effy (w/ Allie Katch)

The crowd is pretty split in their love for both these men. Effy wants a little kiss. Suzuki wants one first….SLAP! He tries again and gives Suzuki a slap right back. Effy wants Suzuki bad. Minoru smiles, bows and proceeds to kick Effy out of the ring and batter him around the floor. Effy’s strikes do nothing. Suzuki’s chops make Effy hot. He wants so much more. Effy tries one and hurts his own hand. Suzuki is encouraging him but chopping the life out of Effy’s chest. Suzuki twists Effy to the mat and tries to wrench the arms off. Effy catches Suzuki with the Gayrantula and then a more traditional tarantula style stretch. Suzuki is amused and clubs Effy down tries to choke him out. Effy escapes the piledriver and twists the nipples of Suzuki. Suzuki doesn’t care but is in pain as Effy bites his nipples. Northern lights for two! Suzuki with a strike! Effy with a deep kiss on the lips. Suzuki with a sleeper and hits the Gotch piledriver to get the three! This was exactly as ridiculous as I expected. See you in the morning, Daddy.

Winner: Minoru Suzuki

Match 5: The Greatest Clusterf***

Holy hell This match is going to be harder than usual to cover, isn’t it? XD

The rules: entrants at random intervals. eliminations by pinfall, submission, over the top rope, leaving the building and DEATH. We love death.

Janela is our first entrant! The poison is seeping in quick. KG calls him “once benevolent, now malevolent”. He promises to kill the clusterf***. Who is number two? BUFF BAGWELL!

Entrant 1: Joey Janela

Entrant 2: Buff Bagwell (w/ Vincenzo the Butler)

We have the American Males music going hard as Buff crutches his way to the ring. Buff is for everyone! Buff needs a chair to help get him into the ring with his leg brace. Joey kicks the music back on for a dance party…and superkicks Buff down for the instant three count!

Entrant 3: George Gatton 

Joey hits a butterfly piledriver as Gatton gets in the ring and gets the three!

Entrant 4: Judas Judd Cassidy

They lock up and Janela throws him over the top quick. 

Entrant 5: Yoya

Yoya hits a Spanish fly! Janela eats strikes and kicks! Huge lariat from Janela. Package Piledriver! Yoya’s done. Janela is on fire.

Entrant 6: Billie Starkz

Billie with a gory bomb! She tries a swanton, knees up! Billie thrown over. The crowd is booooooooooing this as Janela moons her. Talk about showing your ass.

Entrant 7: Juicy Finau

Joey isn’t thrilled at this. He comes in with strikes! He can’t suplex Juicy. Juicy can suplex Janela though! 

Entrant 8: Sam Stackhouse

Another big man hitting the ring! It’s a hoss fight but Janela gets between them like a fool. They launch him across the ring and squash him in the corner. They try a sandwich but Janela ducks. Sam wants a moonsault? He misses! Juicy tries to eliminate Sam, Janela eliminates them both! Will Janela actually run the table?!?

Entrant 9: Rhett Titus

Titus in and wrestles Janela right to the mat! Janela to his feet and shoves Rhett. Running boots from Rhett! Monkey flip! Music hits and Rhett stops in his tracks…

Entrant 10: The Invisible Man

The former Clusterf*** winner is back! Rhett Titus goes head to head, trading back and forth! Titus taken down over and over by the invisible man. Janela doesn’t fare much better and almost gets eliminated. Titus and Janela team up on Invisible Man after a elbow to the throat. Double team suplex! They celebrate…until they get hit with a double low blow! Invisible Man runs Titus around the ring and eliminates him over the top. Janela puts the boots to Invisible Man as our next entrant hits the ring.

Entrant 11: Dante Leon

Inside out cutter on Janela! 

Entrant 12: Ninja Mack

Time for some flippy s***! Mack and Leon trading strikes! Quick dodges and Kip ups. Janela tries to join the party but he gets kicked in the face. Leon with a shooting star into a destroyer on Mack! They both roll out of the ring as the next entrant hits.

Entrant 13: Jimmy Lloyd

Jimmy Lloyd seems like he has something wrong with him. Is he sick? Janela asks what’s wrong? Does he have GCW Covid? Janela needs masks. They have a reprise of their social distancing match! Combat at six feet of distance! Janela thrown over! He skins the cat! Social Distance Destroyer! Mack with a superkick to Lloyd. Handspring dive to Janela! Lloyd hits Mack with a tombstone for the pin.

Entrant 14: Early Morning Guy Steele

Who…is under this costume and mask? He can’t quite get into the ring and falls on his face. He goes to the top and falls off. Lloyd and Janela stomp him out. Front flip neckbreaker?!? Destroyer to Lloyd! One for Janela! He goes back to the top…where did Dante Leon go? EMGS hits a 450 splash?!?! Janela with a rollup and EMGS is out. What. Was. That. O_o

Entrant 15: Blake Christian 

There’s Dante! Blake gives him a series of suplexes. Invisible Man is back and hits Blake low. Blake drops him as our next entrant hits.

Entrant 16: Kevin Blackwood

Blackwood goes right for Leon. Suplex for two! Janela mocks Blackwood and Invites a beating.

Entrant 17: Hoodfoot

Blackwood wants a piece. Hoodfoot firing chops and a shoulder tackle. 

Entrant 18: SLADE

The man from Rikers surveys the carnage and stalks around the ring, waiting for his moment. Hoodfoot and Blackwood continue their fight.

Entrant 19 & 20: Charlie Tiger & Ellis Taylor

Young Dumb & Broke have arrived! They take control on Blackwood and Hoodfoot.

Entrant 21: Deranged

Deranged drops YDNB, puts the boots to Hoodfoot and squares up with Blackwood

Entrant 22: Grim Reefer

Reefer lights up! The crowd demands he “pass that s***”! We have a little circle with most of the participants. Janela grabs a mic and says that since he’s no longer signed to AEW, he can smoke that live on iPPV. Janela panics and runs to the men’s room after a big hit.

Entrant 23: Sandra Moon

Sandra doesn’t want a hit from Reefer. Grim clotheslines her down. Lloyd and Hoodfoot beating on Reefer. SLADE still waiting.

Entrant 24: Parrow

Time for some eliminations? Parrow stomps the joint. Pop up KO punch to Deranged. Three count. Grim Reefer tosses in the fireman’s carry out to the floor. Moon and Blackwood trading slaps on the outside.

Entrant 25: Big Fn Vin

Time for big boys to have a big battle. Clubbing forearms back and forth! Parrow sent over the top, Vin boots him off the apron for the elimination. Janela is off the side eating Cheetos and asking the camera what his next spot is.

Entrant 26: Spider Nate Webb

Parrow is angrily waiting for Webb. They stare down before Webb continues his full teenage dirtbag entrance. Janela follows him through the crowd….with Cheetos. Invisible Man and Jimmy Lloyd go at it back in the ring! Lloyd dropped! Nate Webb in there and he eats an invisible head scissor. Janela pulls IV off and offers him some Cheetos. It’s a trap! Janela sets up sweet chin music! It connects! Invisible Man is thrown out to the floor and that’s it! The crowd is furious! Webb hits Soylent green on Janela! Webb charges in, Janela pulls the rope and Webb is eliminated. Hoodfoot tries to dump Janela, Joey staggers the big man with forearms and puts him over the top to the floor.

Entrant 27: Shazza McKenzie

This is a greatest hits of Janela’s past follies. Shazza wants another piece of the Bad Boy. Big suplex to Janela. DVD to Shazza. He grabs a door! SLADE continues to wait as Shazza spears Joey through the door.

Entrant 28: Janai Kai

Shazza and Janai square up and talk trash but there’s music already…

Entrant 29: Jazzy Yang

Sandra Moon hops into the ring to size everyone up.

Entrant 30: Edith Surreal

Entrant 31: Dark Shiek

Wrestling is for Everybody! Are the women about to face off finally? They seem to be talking it out?

Entrant 32: LuFisto

YESSSSSSS!!!!!! The fight breaks out! All the women fight the men! Dante Leon sent flying! Ellis Taylor sent packing. Charlie Tiger takes a pounding from the ladies, finish after finish until he’s tossed out. They size up Big Vin and send him over the top. Janai Kai superkicks LuFisto off the apron. Chaos breaks out! Sandra Moon sent out! Shazza battle, Kai hit with a stunner for the three. Janela back in! Superkick to Shazza and she’s down for three. Dark Shiek kicks Edith off the apron in the chaos. Janela runs from Dark Shiek and Jazzy. SLADE is still on the floor.

Entrant 33: Maven

Pop for Maven! SLADE hands Janela a chair as the rest of the participants wait for Maven to get in. Maven hits a dropkick on everyone who gets in his face. He shakes Blake Christians hand though…and dropkicks him. Maven decides he’s done and eliminates himself by leaving the building. Shazza gives Maven a hug before he takes off. 

Entrant 34: Sean Sapp

Introduced as the Grapple Jesus. He wants $5. 

Entrant 35: Josh Barnett

Denise Salcedo hits a low blow on Sapp and eliminates him.

Entrant 36: Nasty Leroy

Leroy is going to mix it up with Barnett?!? Josh takes his head off with a boot.

Entrant 37: Jimmy Wang Yang

Jimmy wants to fight the Warmaster! It’s time for cowboy s***! Yang with a rough takedown. Barnett misses a dropkick! Jazzy Yang hits the ring to help her dad! Jazzy takes Barnett down! Is…Josh giving her a lesson in submissions??? She learned too well and he taps out?!? Lloyd eats a cutter from Jazzy! Three count! 

Entrant 38: Alec Price

Price goes right at Jazzy. Jimmy eliminated over the top By Blake Christian. Jazzy comes running, Price sends her over and drops her with a superkick!

Entrant 39: Cole Radrick

Price and Radrick going hard. Radrick with a springboard cutter. Price doesn’t hit the floor! Radrick on the apron too! They take each other out!

Entrant 40: Brandon Kirk

Dark Sheik with a Johnny cage low blow on Kirk. Kirk fakes her out and spikes Sheik to the match. Somewhere in there, SLADE has left the building to check in with his parole officer? He’s out.

Entrant 41: one of the guys from the Walmart crew

Kirk lariats Walmart in the back of the head but gets suplexed. Spinning tombstone! Kirk is pinned! Janela hits a DVD and Walmart guy is out. Apparently his name was Lord Adrian?

Entrant 42: Kevin Matthews

KM is huge and cuts him in half with a big boot. Nasty Leroy wants some. He hits a rock bottom! Nasty elbow! Nasty puts on a sharpshooter! KM submits! Janela holds Leroy’s hand up in victory…big hug…LOW BLOW! Superkick and a three count. Boooooooo!

Entrant 43: Nick Wayne

Slingshot Destroyer on Janela. Kick out! Janela push him off the top, Nick almost pulls Joey out! Janela tries a dvd…Nick Wayne hits a superkick and JOEY JANELA IS ELIMINATED!!!! Huge crowd pop for Nick Wayne!!!

Entrant 44: Team LA Fights: Hunter Freeman, Jack Cartwheel, Jay Vidal, Matt Vandergriff, Ju Dizz

LA Fights owning the ring. Blackwood hitting a modified sitout bomb and he’s out.

Entrant 45: Second Gear Crew: Manders, Eli Everett, Mance Warner, AJ Gray, Matthew Justice

Nowwwww, it’s a Clusterf***! SGC eliminating and beating people left and right. Vandergriff and Freeman are sent over. Jack Cartwheel does a hand walk to avoid elimination but Manders blasts him with a chair. Jay Vidal eats a lariat from Gray and Manders presses slams him out! Blake Christian, Nick Wayne and Dark Shiek join the fray. Warner, Gray and Manders kicked under the ropes and Shiek dives out to them. Is she out? Christian and Wayne pummel Manders with superkicks. Everett eats a cutter and Frogsplash. Manders and Eli tossed over the top! Are Christian and Wayne the final two? Wayne goes for a cutter but Blake hits knees to the back. Flipping headlock slam! Wayne is down for the three! Dark Sheik in with a flying kick. Gray, Mancer and Justice are back too! Huge lariat from Gray and SGC piles on the three count. Blake Christian is the only non SGC left. He comes in hard, throwing superkicks everywhere! Suicide dives for everyone! Double lariat to Blake! Triple power plex from SGC! Blake is down for the three and SGC win as a unit!

Winners (teams can win?): Second Gear Crew

If you enjoy PWInsider.com you can check out the AD-FREE PWInsider Elite section, which features exclusive audio updates, news, our critically acclaimed podcasts, interviews and more by clicking here!

• Tweet