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3/31 GCW PLANET DEATH REPORT FROM DALLAS, TEXAS

GCW - Planet Death

4/1/22 - Dallas,TX

Live on FITE.tv

Day 1 of Mania week draws to a close with my 5th show of the day. Time for an ultraviolent supershow to send us off to our beds. Emil Jay brings out our official Planet Death host, NICK FN’ GAGE! It’s time for some deathmatch s***! Gage joins Kevin Gill at the commentary table.

Match 1: SLADE vs Bam Sullivan (Taipei Deathmatch)

Yes indeed, taped up hands dipped in broken glass. The crowd is fired up for this. SLADE is ready to throw hands. Sullivan runs him into the corner and drops punches. Fight to the outside, SLADE grinds the glass into Bam’s head. Bam pummels SLADE into the front row but the man from Rikers is unamused and tackles Bam into the apron. SLADE grabs some glass and carves into Bam’s skull more. He shoves glass up Bam’s nose and screams for him to quit! Trading punches, Bam is a bloody mess. Bam hits a spear and grinds out on SLADE. Big suplex. Kick out! Bam with a double leg and flips to a crab. STF! SLADE out and hits a chokeslam! SLADE with a RNC while grinding glass into Bam’s forehead. Sullivan goes to sleep in the hold and SLADE wins!

Winner: SLADE

Match 2: “Wildheart” Cole Radrick vs “The Death Samurai” Akira (Thumbtack Kickpad Light Tube Deathmatch)

Akira takes the back and knee drops the flesh of Radrick. His kick pads are nearly clean of tacks after that. Radrick grabs a tube but Akira blasts it into his face. Akira tries a roll up but Radrick breaks a tube on him and stabs it right into his forehead. Akira to the outside, Cole dives after him and get suplexed through a door. Akira blasting door pieces into Cole but he keeps coming. Cole eats a steel chair and booted out of it by the death samurai. Cole kicks a tube into the side of Akiras head. Cannonball into a tube! Akira swats Cole out of the air with tubes, German into the glass! Axe kick through a tube! Akira cuts into the forehead and Cole is gushing now. Snake Eyes! Cole dumped on his head. PK through some tubes. Cole kicks out! Cole comes in to stab Akira…Akira chews the tube and spits the glass in Cole’s face! That was nuts. Cole blasts another tube, moonsault for two! Cole busts a tube in Akira’s mouth, he carves his own chest. Battle in the center, Akira with short kicks to the face, Cole grabs a sleep and drags Akira to the mat. He doesn’t stay down! Cole explodered into a tree of woe! Akira sets up a bundle and blasts a knee through it. Cole kicks out! Cole grabs a tube and breaks it in a choke. Akira kicks out! Akira with a rolling kick, German for two! Akira setting up a chair and door structure. More broken tubes. Akira to the top but Cole punches the tube through his chest. A wild eyed Radrick attempts a superplex but Akira scoops him and slams off the buckles through the door. Cradle back suplex for two! Akira kicked off the ropes and he crotches himself. Slingshot cutter from

Radrick. He spikes Akira through a tube bundle and gets the three! Wiiiiiiiiild match. They show respect to each other by breaking a pair of tubes over their own heads and carving their chests in unison. 

Winner: Cole Radrick

Match 3: Sawyer Wreck v Brandon Kirk (Boards of F***ery deathmatch)

Boards covered in barbed wire, gussets, razors, knives, etc. I hope Brandon Kirk goes through all of them. Wreck whips a chair into Kirk’s head. Chokeslam for two! She fills Kirk’s arm and head with gussets. She smashes a chair into the gussets. Big kick in the head for two! Brandon is a bloody mess already. Kirk stomps her face first into the razor board! She gets a gusset to the head and a chair chaser. He stabs her in the mouth with knives. Hard slap plants her in a chair. He pickpockets the ref and staples money to her head. He tries to staple her tongue. Burning hammer through a chair! Kick out at one! Sawyer with a chokeslam through a light tube board. Brandon Kirk stays down for the three! Jesus Christ, this got crazy right out of the gate and bloodily sprinted through the weapons. 

Winner: Sawyer Wreck

Match 4: Neil Diamond Cutter vs Shane Mercer (Lighttube Bundle Deathmatch)

NDC grabs some chairs and a bundle. He charges Mercer but ends up smashing himself through tubes. Mercer yeets him across the ring repeatedly. Tubes to the head, suplex toss into the broken glass. NDC hits Mercer with a chair…step up chair senton! It’s not enough and Mercer is out at one. Mercer slams Cutter through a chair, while explodes. Headbutt through a tube. Mercer with a one hand slam and tube bundle follow up! NDC ain’t dead. Mercer dropped to the corner…cannonball! NDC asks Mercer for some…the iron demon obliges. NDC springboards…Mercer hits a sitout powerbomb! NDC with a cutter! Light tube senton from the honey badger. NDC brings in a ladder….it’s a tall boi. Mercer rips his shirt off and tries to strangle Cutter out. He drags NDC through the glass! Cutter has a staple gun…staples to the knee! Mercer catches NDC in a cross body…he runs up to the top for Moonsault & Battery through light tubes. He should pin him but he’s gonna take him up the ladder. Cutter trying to fight out but Mercer hits Moonsault & Battery off the ladder and NDC is definitely down for the three.

Winner: Shane Mercer 

Match 5: Hoodfoot vs Mad Man Pondo (Lighttube Deathmatch)

Handshake of respect from these big men. Props to Pondo for losing 50 lbs since last year. They trade big bar brawl punches. Hoodfoot busts a beer bottle over the head. Get the tubes. Cannonball into the corner! Pondo already bleeding heavy as he kicks out at two. Hoodfoot heads up the buckles but Pondo catches him in the tree of woe. He sets up a stop sign on Hoodfoot and throws a wooden crate right into it. Tubes to the back. Pondo grabs a gusset and hammers that into the skull. Pondo has a shank and carves into Hoodfoot’s skull. Pondo covering Hoodfoot in blood. He breaks a beer bottle and stabbing at Hoodfoot with the broken end. Pondo gut shots Hoodfoot with his giant saw blade bat. Hoodfoot takes that saw to the crotch and he is hurting bad.  Pondo is carving him up. Hoodfoot gets the eyes and takes his time stomping tube after tube into Pondo’s body. Double stomp a tube through Pondo’s face? Kick out At two! Another stop sign shot to the head. Pondo sets up a door on chairs with some light tubes covered in a thumbtacks, a perfectly normal thing to have. Hoodfoot catches Pondo running and suplexes Pondo through the door and tubes for the win!

Winner: Hoodfoot

Main Event: Jimmy Lloyd vs Sadika 

Doors and barbed wires boards everywhere. Lloyd with a cactus clothesline! Sadika bested back into the ring but she dropkicks a chair into his back! Lloyd with an iconoclasm! Sadika back body dropped through a door. Lloyd tearing at sadika’s mask. She throws him in to a door. It doesn’t break at first but second time is a charm. She sets up a barbed wire door on chairs outside the ring. Trading shots and kicks on the apron….swinging neckbreaker down through the door! Lloyd is a blood mess as they trade punches in the pocket.  He spikes her with a piledriver. Kick out. Slam into the barbed wire, Sadika gets right up! Lloyd swept off the top. Sadika dropping headbutts…corkscrew splash to Lloyd on the barbed wire door!

Winner: Sadika

Post match, Sadika says she wants a real match with light tubes and fire. Lloyd cuts her off and sends her to the back with a middle finger. What a weird ending. O_o

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