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AEW DARK TV REPORT

By Joshua Higham on 2021-04-07 12:53:00

Taz and Excalibur welcome us to a “massive” edition of AEW Dark. 

We start with trios action as the Dark Order is represented by Evil Uno, Stu Grayson, and Alex Reynolds. The makeshift trio tonight is Jake St Patrick, Sage Scott, Chandler Hopkins, who try to jump the Dark Order before the bell. Alex Reynolds connected with a small package driver to get the win for the Dark Order. 

Cezar Bononi and Ryan Nemeth are in the back, and Nemeth talks about the need for wingmen and that he’ll change JD Drake. 

Team Taz is wrestling in trios action, taking on Justin Law, Hayden Backlund, and Brick Aldridge. There still seems to be issues between Brian Cage and Ricky Starks with Cage tagging Hobbs in instead of Starks. Brick Aldridge tries to match power with his opponents, because his partners can’t. Starks tags himself in along with Backlund. Starks hits Rochambeau and tags Cage in to hit Drill Claw. Team Taz gets the win and Cage hesitantly shakes hands with Starks. 

Jungle Boy and Luchasaurus are out next to take on Dean Alexander and Rex Lawless. Happy to see Rex Lawless getting some screen time on Dark the last few weeks. Chokeslam to Lawless, tail whip to Alexander, and a running elbow to the back of the head by Jungle Boy gives Jurassic Express. 

Fuego del Sol comes to the ring with Marko Stunt and Griff Garrison, called the Vlog Squad. So Sammy Guevara’s vlog apparently features Fuego, Marko, and Griff. Ryan comes with accompanied by JD Drake. Did Peter Avalon get hurt? Did I miss something? Fuego tried a springboard attack, but Nemeth hit him with a dropkick and the Rude Awakening. Nemeth wins. 

Jon Cruz is already in the ring awaiting The Butcher. The Butcher arrives with the rest of the Hardy Family Office. Filet Mignon from Butcher and a quick win, as Private Party and The Blade celebrate with him in the ring. 

The Sea Stars are making their AEW tag team debut against Jazmin Allure and Vertvixen. This match stems from Vertvixen unsuccessfully teaming with Sea Stars last week. An exploder and an elevated senton give the Sea Stars, who are still the reigning Shimmer tag team champions, the win. 

We see a music video from Max Caster about his match on Dynamite with Hangman Page where he puts a rocking horse through a door and then Pillmanized it. 

Madi Wrenkowski and Vipress are teaming for the first time to take on Red Velvet and KiLynn King, accompanied by Big Swole. Kingdom Falls from KiLynn and Chef’s Kiss from Velvet finish off Vipress. 

JD Drake prepares for his shot at the TNT Championship by taking on Baron Brawler, I mean Baron Black. Ryan Nemeth is staying ringside. Chops from Baron Black leave a handprint and some blood on Drake’s chest, but a running boot from Drake finally finishes off Black. 

Sonny Kiss and Joey Janela are taking on KC Navarro and Aaron Frye, making their first tag team attempt. Navarro and Frye try to start off hot, but Janela stops them with a double clothesline. Janela actually forces Navarro to tag in Frye. Kiss and Janela win after a split legged stunner and a top rope elbow drop. Excalibur calls Janela’s top rope elbow drop a “Greetings from Asbury Park,” and Taz does well to show some confusion. Excalibur claims it’s an homage to the late Bam Bam Bigelow. 

“Starving Artist” Mike Magnum has a paintbrush with him as he faces Matt Sydal. A paintbrush isn’t the best wrestling prop. Lightning Spiral out of nowhere gives Sydal the quick win.

Matt Hardy has the full HFO with him as he takes on Vary Morales. We’re shown Darby Allin watching from somewhere high up in Daily’s Place. And Hardy's double underhook submission has a name: The Leech. 

Hardy has a mic, and he calls Darby Allin a corporate sellout. Hardy’s still extreme, and he’ll leech the life out of Darby Allin and become champion. 

In the Dark main event, we have TH2 taking on Bear Country. TH2’s speed and technique is no match for Bear Country. Bear Country Jamboree is now called a Bear Bomb, which is a lamer name. Bear Country wins as they head to Dynamite to face Jurassic Park. 

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