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Excalibur, Taz, and Anthony Ogogo welcome us to a “massive" episode of Dark. 

John Skyler has music and an entrance, but here comes Brian Cage accompanied by Hook. Excalibur mentions how Skyler is returning from a horrible knee injury, but this match is only a little longer than his match last week. Powerbomb and Drillclaw gives Cage the win in probably under a minute. 

Lee Johnson has Arn Anderson with him. It looks like Luther has returned to the back as Serpentico wrestles. Ogogo and Excalibur try to claim that Johnson can’t stop winning… guys, he’s won one match in his history of ever in AEW. Calm down. I mean, he’s gonna win his second one here, but still. Blue Thunder Bomb gets Johnson his first singles victory as Anderson tries to coach him a little more after the match. 

JD Drake gets an entrance on his AEW debut as he faces the Last of a Dying Breed, Eddie Kingston. Drake and Kingston trade blows and strikes. Drake is on the offensive for most of the match. A missed moonsault by Drake gives Kingston the opening he needs for a Backfist to the Future and the pinfall win. In interviews, Tony Khan talks about Dark being their developmental and a place for them to try out new talent. This match is the proof of that. Not so much the Skyler matches the past few weeks. Drake looks great, even with the expected loss. 

Brooke Havok, a recent graduate of the Nightmare Factory, comes to the ring with Cody Rhodes endorsing her, to face Leyla Hirsch. Hirsch gets the win with an armbar. After the match, Rhodes mentioned on Twitter that Havok tore her ACL during this match, and you’d never have noticed. Speedy recovery to the young Havok. 

Angel Fashion and VSK are already in the ring as their opponents Jurassic Express come to the ring. Jungle Boy wasn’t totally on Luchasaurus’ shoulders as they came out. This is gonna sound mean, but it kinda feels like AEW is gearing up for Jungle Boy to be Shawn and Luchasaurus to be Marty. Their powerbomb combo gets Jurassic Express the quick win. 

QT Marshall is coming to the ring with Nick Comoroto with him. JJ Garrett is already in the ring.  Garrett gets an early advantage with some mat wrestling, but QT gets the win with a pop-up punch and a Diamond Cutter. 

Marko Stunt is all energy as he comes to the ring. They finally allowed Max Caster to take the mic cube off the mic as he raps. Caster makes a Wild Thornberrys reference. Commentary tries to put over Max Caster’s strength… it’s a match with Marko Stunt. Again, calm down. Max Caster gets the win. 

Chris Peaks and Louie Valle are in the ring as the Dark Order come to the ring. Reynolds and Silver are the Dark Order representatives in this one. I feel like this might be Chris Peaks’ first match in quite some time. Peaks and Valle have matching gear, of which I am always a fan. As a Chikara fan from a certain era, this is a fun match to see four guys without their masks, facepaint, and alter egos. (Since they talked about it on Twitter, Peaks and Valle are the former Obariyon and Kodama of the Batiri respectively.) Dark Destroyer on Valle gives the Recruitment Specialists the win. 

If another website’s database is to be believed, that was Chris Peaks’ first real match in about 14 months. 

Fuego del Sol is already in the match for his opponent, Kip Sabian, accompanied by Penelope Ford. Taz wonders why it’s not Penelope Sabian, but Excalibur kinda reminds Taz it’s 2021. Deathly Hallows gives Sabian the win. Still no Tornado DDT from Fuego del Sol. 

Shawn Dean and Carlie Bravo get their entrance, rocking the veteran gimmick with Dean repping the Navy and Bravo the Marines. Sidenote: I appreciate Dean and Bravo together again, instead of Dean gettting a random partner every week. Varsity Blonds are the opponents. Taz tells everyone to get a good last look at the Varsity Blonds since they’ll be taking on Cage and Starks on Dynamite. Austin Gunn found a US flag somewhere, and Excalibur is quick to point out that all five people in the ring are American. Bravo and Pillman trade nurples at one point. A dropkick/powerbomb combo gives the Blonds the win, even though Pillman momentarily forgot he was the legal man. 

Keep Dean and Bravo together. No more makeshift random names out of the fish bowl partners for Shawn Dean. There’s potential with these two together.

Oh my goodness, we’ve only now just hit the halfway point. 

Ryan Nemeth vs Aaron Solow is up next. Ogogo is trying to sell that Solow has officially signed on as a member of the Nightmare Family, which I thought happened weeks ago. Nemeth is extremely chatty in the ring. Pretty Peter Avalon and Cezar Bononi come out to watch the match from the stage. Nemeth gets the win with a Rude Awakening. Avalon, Bononi, and Nemeth attack Solow after the match until Nick Comoroto, QT Marshall, and Lee Johnson of the Nightmare Family show up. 

Ivelisse and Diamante come to the ring for the match against Miranda Alize and Renee Michelle. Alize is wearing a mask. Oh wait, no, she’s not anymore. Ivelisse and Diamante win. 

Top Flight are out to take on Steven Stetson and Tony Vega, who are already in the ring. Stetson and Vega get some offense in on the younger of Top Flight, but a hot tag later, and Top Flight get the win. 

Time for a makeshift eight man tag: Bear Country, Joey Janela, and Sonny Kiss are teaming up to take on Levi Shapiro, M’Badu, Daniel Joseph, and Aaron Frye. I think this is Levi Shapiro’s AEW debut, and when I read the lineup, I thought it was Levi Everett, a very different wrestler. M’Badu is on my list of too many losses to mean something in the near future. Huracanrana by Sonny Kiss, Death Valley Driver by Janela, and Bear Country Jamboree on Levi Shapiro gets the win. 

Ryzin and Baron Black don’t get entrances this week before they take on Pretty Peter Avalon and Cezar Bononi. Avalon is wearing a different robe than he was earlier. Ryzin is very chatty tonight. Black and Ryzin have some success with Avalon until Avalon uses referee Bryce Remsburg as a distraction. We learn that Taz’s favorite fish is a barracuda. Ryzin misses a second rope moonsault, but so does Avalon. Cezar Bononi lifts Avalon up and connects with an assisted Marti-knees to get Avalon and Bononi the wing. 

Tesha Price is looking for her first AEW win as she takes on KiLynn King. King has some face-paint and crystals added to her look since we’ve last seen her. Tesha is showing a little more heelish tendencies after a babyface entrance. King gets the win after Kingdom Fall.

SCU, The Hybrid2, and the Sydal Brothers are in three way tag team action. Once again, this feels like an inevitable match with the whole SCU stipulation. Even if it’s the main event, SCU is not breaking up on Dark. The Sydal brothers aren’t matching. Not a fan of that. Rick Knox is your referee, which Dave will love, and it kinda means tornado rules. I have no clue who’s legal at any point. Mike Sydal takes the majority of the punishment from Hybrid2. We get a little scrambly with everyone connecting with moves and flashy offense, but a reverse DDT from Kazarian on Evans is enough to get the win for SCU.  

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