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Welcome to the Impact Wrestling Report here on PWInsider.com!
We start off with our customary look back at last week's episode, then we head to the ring for our opening match...
Caleb Konley vs KM
Konley jumps KM on his way into the ring, and KM starts to mount a comeback when we cut backstage to Brian Cage going on a rampage looking for Johnny Impact and roughing up anyone and everyone in his path. We head back to the ring just as Brian Cage comes out of the back and destroys both KM and Konley.
NO CONTEST
Fallah Bahh comes in and tries to stop Cage, but Cage casually pounds his skull in, sits him on the top rope, and powerbombs him, then he goes out to the ramp, grabs KM as he tries to crawl for his life, and gives him an F5 on the entry ramp. Now Cage goes back into the ring and gives the referee (who happened to referee Cage's title match at Homecoming) a short clothesline, and then a Drill Claw. He gets a mic and calls out Johnny Impact, chastises him for giving Killer Kross a title shot before him, and tells Impact he'll see him soon. He doesn't have to wait long, because Impact comes out to confront Cage, but gets jumped by Killer Kross and Moose before he has a chance to say a word. Moose holds Impact while Kross pounds his face in, and Cage just stands there and watches. Kross and Moose leave, and Cage finally goes out of the ring, drags Impact to the ring by the wrist, roughly dumps him into the ring, and goes for an F5, but Moose comes in and spears him before he can complete the move. Moose dumps Cage to the outside as Kross dishes out another beating to Impact. We're at commercial.
Brian Cage is backstage saying that if Moose wants to stick his nose in his business, he can face him later on tonight.
Josh and Don talk about stuff, then Eli Drake comes out to join them on commentary for our next match...
Eddie Edwards vs Ethan Page
Page gets the early advantage with some power-based offense, but Eddie outmaneuvers and outsmarts Page, using his own momentum to sidestep a charge and send Page out to the floor. Eddie goes out after him, lays in a few chops, goes back into the ring, comes out with a baseball slide to Page's grill, then more chops and a back rake for good measure. Page finally has enough, hoists Eddie into the air, and drops him chest-first onto the barricade. Page stops to run his mouth at Drake, then we head back into the ring where he puts the boots to Eddie as we go to commercial.
We're back, and Eddie is still in trouble as Page whips him hard into the corner, but Page must have never seen an Eddie Edwards match before because he makes the cardinal sin of going to the second rope. Sure enough, he eats a leaping enziguiri, followed by a super Frankensteiner. Eddie starts mounting the big comeback, planting Page with a blue thunder bomb for 2. Page shuts that down momentarily with a cradle brainbuster for 2, but Eddie dumps him to the floor and takes him out with a dive as Eli sings the old American Wolves entrance theme. Eddie grabs the Singapore cane, but gets distracted by the referee and eats a bicycle kick from Page that knocks him to the floor. Page tries to come through the ropes, but Eddie drills him with the cane to draw the DQ.
Winner by DQ: Ethan Page
Drake gets the mic and tells Eddie to look what he just did to himself, because he's walking around with this cane, in his jeans, wearing his Chucks, and all he needs to do is pound a few pancakes and he'll look just like Tommy Dreamer. Eli says he used to be a multi-time tag champ, X-Division Champion, and a World Champion, and they even faced off once for the title, but now he's gone hardcore. Eli asks where that's gotten him, and when the last time was he was even in the title scene. Maybe it's time he dons the green tights again, and see the old Eddie Edwards again, and not the cane carrying, cross-eyed halfwit he sees in the ring. Drake has a challenge for Eddie: he wants him to drop the cane, dig deep inside, and find that fire and desire he used to have, and be the champion he used to be, because right now, he's looking at a hardcore loser, and that's not an insult, it's just a fact of life.
The GWN flashback takes us back to a hardcore cage match from the very early years of TNA.
The Rascalz are backstage getting high, Zack points out that Trey is wearing the same suit for the last three weeks, Trey makes fun of them for losing to the Lucha Brothers last week, and says he's taking the X Division Title home tonight.
Dark Allie vs Jordynne Grace
Allie makes demon faces at Grace, then the lights suddenly flicker, distracting Allie long enough for Jordynne to go behind and nearly fold Allie in half with a German suplex. Delayed vertical suplex to Allie, but Jordynne gets distracted by activity on the outside and Allie sneaks in with a lungblower for 2. Allie puts the boots to Jordynne, then goes to the eyes and hits a charging clothesline in the corner and a series of forearms, but Jordynne no-sells. Allie goes for a Codebreaker, Jordynne just straight up blocks it, and hits the Here It Is Driver for the easy win.
Winner: Jordynne Grace
Well, that was pretty dominating. Kiera Hogan comes in and raises Jordynne's hand, then Su Yung comes into the ring as they leave and extends her hand to help Allie up, but...THE LIGHTS GO OUT. When they come back up, Rosemary is in the ring in the same exact position Su was just moments ago. Allie looks like she's seen a ghost, and quickly scurries out of the ring and to the back.
Scarlett Bordeaux is lounging backstage, and she says she's watched thousands of videos and has finally chosen the one person: the smartest, the strongest, the most vicious, the most talented, and the winner of the talent search is...SCARLETT BORDEAUX! She says it's not a surprise, because she hasn't even set foot in the ring yet, and she has her own show and had thousands of people vying for her attention. Now she's getting in the ring, and everyone better be ready.
Moose vs Brian Cage
They start brawling right out of the gate, and Cage gets the early advantage. Moose goes to the eyes, but Cage drives him to the floor with a charging shoulderblock. Moose tries to hightail it to the back, but Cage goes after him, and Moose uses the opening to ram him into the steps, the apron, and drill him with a bicycle kick. Cage ducks a chop, and Moose drills the ringpost, and now Cage is going right after Moose's injured hand. Moose tries charging at Cage, but Cage POPS HIM UP AND HITS A RUNNING POWERBOMB INTO THE RINGPOST. Wowzers! Moose goes to Cage's knees when they head back into the ring, and Cage is officially in peril. Cage monkey flips Moose to the floor, but Moose immediately trips Cage and slams his leg against the apron, then the ringpost. Moose continues the assault with a delayed corner dropkick to Cage's knee, and we're at commercial.
We're back, and just like always, Cage turns the tide just as we come back, leveling Moose with clotheslines and another pop-up powerbomb. Cage with a buckle bomb, and a roaring clothesline nearly takes Moose's head off for 2. Cage must not have ever seen a Moose match, because he goes to the second rope, takes a leaping dropkick, and Moose plants him with Go To Hell for 2. Moose grabs the timekeeper's chair and brings it into the ring, Cage ducks a wild swing, and Moose hurts his injured hand. Cage quickly capitalizes with the Drill Claw, and that's all she wrote.
Winner: Brian Cage
Great match, both these guys are really talented big men who have really good big man matches.
We get a telephone update from Taya Valkyrie, who is still at home recovering from the powerbomb into the crowd she took from Killer Kross last week. Taya says Tessa Blanchard is running her mouth and has been bullying everyone for months, but at Homecoming, she got a taste of her own medicine. She's happy to face Tessa anytime, and suggests doing it next week in Mexico City.
Video package of Killer Kross gloating over his actions last week.
McKenzie is backstage with Tessa Blanchard, who screams that she would still be the champion if Gail Kim wasn't in the ring. She scares McKenzie off, then attacks a stagehand and lays out a security guard who tries to stop her. Gail Kim runs in and tries to stop her, but Tessa lays her out too. She grabs a wrench, and Gail knocks it out of her hand and comes after her, but Tessa regains control of the brawl and chokes Gail out with some production cabling. Sonjay Dutt and some other folks finally manage to get Tessa out of the way so they can check on Gail, who is writhing in pain on the floor.
We come back from commercial to see Tessa in a shouting match with Scott D'Amore, who suspends her for her actions.
X Division Title Match: Rich Swann vs Trey
They do a bunch of flippy dippy stuff and the fans chant for the X Division. Swann gets maneuvered to the floor, and Trey takes him out with a dive. They trade right hands back in the ring, Trey goes to the top, Swann hits a standing leap into a super Frankensteiner, then comes off the top with a frogsplash for a close 2. Swann gets a quick small package for another close 2, then they reverse pin attempts back and forth until Trey catches Swann with a superkick. Trey pops Swann onto the top rope, Swann catches him with a rolling sunset flip, and more pinfall reversals that again get us nowhere. Swann superkicks Trey, then hits a second rope 450 splash for the win.
Winner: Rich Swann
Standard X Division fare. The oVe music hits, and here they come! They offer Swann an oVe t-shirt and open their arms to him, but LAX interrupts the party by coming out to the ring for tonight's main event...after this break!
We're back, and it's...MAIN EVENT TIME!
World Tag Team Title Match: LAX vs oVe
The match is already underway as we come back, as all four men brawl at ringside. Jake and Ortiz wind up back in the ring, with Ortiz trying in vain to avoid a series of double teams from the Crists. Konnan checks on Santana, who is down at ringside, as Dave hits a top rope senton for 2. Ortiz is in peril for several moments until breaking away and making the hot tag to Santana, who cleans house on both Crists and comes off the top with a double stomp that Jake avoids, but Ortiz is back in and a series of crisp double teams gets 2 on Jake. LAX hits stereo dives to the Crists on the outside, but Ortiz walks right into a big right hand from Dave, who superplexes Santana into a sitout powerbomb from Jake for 2. LAX with a double full rotation back suplex on Jake for the win.
Winners: LAX
Solid main event to close the evening. LAX bumps into the Lucha Bros when thy return to the back, and Ortiz tells them that if they ever want another ass whipping, to just let them know. Konnan loses it, and asks what he's doing as we go off the air.
Thanks for reading the Impact Wrestling Report here on PWInsider.com, I'll be back soon to discuss Impact and more with Dave Scherer on the Stu & Pid Show!
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