This week’s show starts off like most weeks have, with people talking in the ring. This week it is the return of MizTV. Miz is in the ring, but he does not have his title belt with him. On Wednesday on Main Event, luck struck Kofi Kingston and he escaped with Miz’ Intercontinental Championship. The last 48 hours have been a living hell.
He tells Kofi to cherish this title reign because it will be very short. Miz says that he is officially invoking his rematch clause at Hell in a Cell. He says that he will show Kofi why he is the most must see WWE Superstar. He will win the Intercontinental Championship and then Kofi’s life will be a living hell.
Speaking of hell, his guests is the Tag Team Champions. He brings out Daniel Bryan and Kane.
Miz brings up that they have separate entrances and they are not a true tag team. They are a couple of egomaniacs.
Bryan talks about things being separate. Why not separate Miz’s teeth from his mouth.
Miz throws out a few reallys. The guy with the goat face is going to talk to him about appearance.
Miz reminds Bryan that he was his pro and that they never got along. Just like Bryan did not get along with AJ or Kane. Miz says that Bryan is the problem. The big red monster with the mask is the sensible one. If he wants to be completely honest, when they defend the titles at Hell in a Cell, Bryan will be the reason why they lose.
Kane interrupts Bryan. He says that no one cares what the Miz thinks. He has won tag team championships with angry seven foot giants, deranged psychopaths with multiple personalities, and the dead man himself. Kane says that if Bryan is the problem, he is the solution.
Bryan says that he is not the problem, he is the reason why they will win at Hell in a Cell. Bryan says that the Devil’s Favorite Demon is nothing without the World’s Toughest Vegan.
Kane says that being the World’s Toughest Vegan is like being the World’s Tallest Dwarf. Kane says that Bryan has that covered too.
Kane and Bryan stop Miz from responding.
Bryan says that he is not a dwarf or goat face, he is a former World Champion. He successfully cashed in and defeated a Giant after a forty-five second title reign. Bryan says that he am the Tag Team Champions.
Kane and Bryan go back and forth over who am the Tag Team Champions and Big Show’s music plays and he makes his way to the ring.
Show has a mic and he tells Kane that he doesn’t have a problem with him. They have their date of destiny on Monday. Show says that his problem is with Daniel Bryan. After the beating that Bryan took on Monday, he figured that Daniel would keep his mouth shut. Show wants Bryan to admit that the victory for the title was the biggest fluke in history. Show says that when he beats Sheamus at Hell in a Cell, that will not happen again. He tells Bryan that he will knock Bryan out if he says anything about forty-five seconds.
Show wants to knock out Bryan right now. Kane stands in front of his tag team partner and he tells Show that they do not have to wait until Monday.
They will have to wait until Dolph Ziggler’s music stops playing and Ziggler and Vickie Guerrero make their way to the ring. Dolph says that Daniel Bryan cashing against Show is so last year. The only important thing is Dolph cashing in.
All Hell in a Cell, Show and Sheamus will beat the hell out of each other. Then Ziggler says that he will steal the show and become World Heavyweight Champion. It does not matter if he cashes in on Sheamus or Big Show. If Bryan can do it, how hard can it be?
Bryan starts to talk and Show intimidates him.
People are arguing and talking over each other and that means it is time for the man in charge to make his way to the stage. Booker wants everyone to listen to what he has to say.
Miz tells Booker to save it because everyone knows what he is going to do. He is going to make a main event match with everyone in the ring. Will it be a tag match or a handicap tag match? He says that Booker is so creative and he asks if Booker can dig that and he tells Booker good-bye.
Booker says that he was not going to say that. He has an announcement. There will be two main event caliber matches tonight. First, Daniel Bryan and Kane will face Dolph Ziggler and the Big Show.
Miz asks Booker what the second announcement is and he wonders how good Booker’s math skills are.
Booker tells Miz he will be facing this man . . .
Do you hear the voices in your head, because they are talking to him.
Match Number One: Randy Orton versus Miz
The match is joined in progress and Orton with a shoulder tackle. Orton blocks a hip toss and hits a short arm clothesline followed by a boot to the head. Orton with a boot to the solar plexus. Orton with a kick and we see Alberto Del Rio and Ricardo Rodriguez watching from a skybox in the arena.
Miz with elbows to Orton and he punches him in the corner. Orton with punches of his own to Miz Miz with an Irish whip but Orton with a clothesline out of the corner. Orton with a snap mare and he gets a near fall. Orton stomps on Miz’ hand and then Orton with a belly-to-back suplex for a near fall.
Miz with a knee to the midsection and then he drops Orton on the top rope and then Miz with a running shoulder tackle that sends Orton off the apron and into the ringside barrier. We go to commercial.
We are back and Miz with a reverse chin lock. Orton with elbows and a head butt. Miz hits the Reality Check and gets a near fall. Miz with a knee to the back and elbows.
Matt Striker asks Alberto about the message that Randy Orton sent to Alberto with the RKO to Ricardo. Ricardo asks if that is the same message that Kane sent to Striker last week. Matt asks Alberto about the Hell in a Cell match. Del Rio says that Orton is a little girl. Orton is afraid of Alberto Del Rio. Randy is nothing. Alberto says that he is the new Apex Predator in the WWE.
Back to the action in the ring. Miz with a reverse chin lock but Orton with elbows. Miz with an Irish whip and the Awesome Clothesline. Miz goes up top but Orton stops Miz and crotches him. Orton with punches to Miz and he hits a superplex.
Orton gets a near fall. Orton with two clotheslines. Miz misses a clothesline and Orton with a power slam. Miz rolls to the apron and he sets for the IEDDT but Miz goes to the floor. Orton follows but Miz returns to the ring. Miz misses a clothesline and Orton with a drop kick for a near fall.
Miz with a kick and a DDT for a near fall. Miz misses a running boot to the head and Orton sends Miz to the apron for the IEDDT and Orton hits it. Orton looks around and then he twists to the mat and he pounds the mat before he tries for the RKO. Miz counters and tries for a Skull Crushing Finale but Orton rolls Miz through and Orton hits the RKO for the three count.
Winner: Randy Orton
Orton and Del Rio stare down from a distance and Orton wants Del Rio to come down to the ring.
Del Rio says that they are going to do this on his terms, not Orton’s.
Sheamus is walking in the back and he sees Teddy Long on the phone. Sheamus says that he is not doing that great. He says that he is not one to complain but for the last two weeks he has had some epic scraps in the ring with Wade Barrett until Big Show stuck his arse into the match. He wants one more match with Wade Barrett.
Teddy says that he will talk to Booker and he thinks it will happen. Teddy suggests that it be a lumberjack match tonight.
Sheamus tells Teddy that he feels him . . . playa.
Sheamus walks away and so does Teddy. We see someone emerge from the shadows and it is Eve.
We go to commercial.
Match Number Two: Cody Rhodes and Damien Sandow versus Tyson Kidd and Justin Gabriel
Rhodes and Gabriel start things off and Gabriel blocks a kick from Rhodes and he takes Rhodes to the mat with a kick to the knees. Kidd tags in and Gabriel with a chin lock to expose Rhodes’ head to a kick from Kidd. Tyson gets a near fall. Kidd tags Gabriel back in and he connects with a double sledge from the turnbuckles. Rhodes with an Irish whip but Gabriel gets his boots up.
Gabriel goes up top but Sandow pulls Rhodes out of the ring. Gabriel with a suicide dive onto Sandow and Rhodes with a clothesline on the floor. Rhodes punches and kicks Gabriel when they return to the ring. Sandow tags in and he puts Gabriel in the ropes and Sandow with a running knee to the back for a near fall. Sandow with a side Russian leg sweep and he rolls through and hits the Elbow of Disdain and gets a near fall.
Sandow with a chin lock and Rhodes tags back in and he gives Gabriel a snap mare and he applies a cravate. Gabriel lands on his feet on a belly-to-back suplex attempt and Gabriel with a spinning heel kick and both men are down.
Sandow tags in and Gabriel misses an enzuigiri. Sandow misses an elbow drop. Kidd tags in and he kicks Sandow in the head from the apron and then hits a springboard drop kick and knocks Rhodes off the apron. Kidd with a kick and a drop kick to the head for a near fall.
Kidd kicks Sandow and goes to the apron. Kidd with a kick to the back and Sandow makes the tag while Kidd hits a sunset flip and sets for the Sharpshooter. Rhodes with the Beautiful Disaster for the three count.
Winners: Damien Sandow and Cody Rhodes
After the match, Rhodes and Sandow shake hands and Rhodes propels Sandow into the cartwheel of October 19th.
We go to Booker’s office and he is telling Eve that she is doing a wonderful job. Teddy Long enters and he apologizes for the interruption. Teddy tells Booker about an idea he has for the main event. Teddy brings up the Barrett/Sheamus Lumberjack Match. Eve says that she has had that idea since last week. Eve says that Teddy is trying to take credit for her idea.
Booker says that he has a meeting so he will holler at them later. Eve leaves with Booker and Teddy smells something fishy. He sees that Eve has left her iPad in the office and he tries to look at what is on it.
We go to commercial.
Match Number Four: Kane and Daniel Bryan versus Dolph Ziggler and Big Show in a Non Title Match
Bryan and Ziggler start things off and they lock up with Bryan applying a waist lock but Ziggler with a standing switch and take down. Ziggler struts and celebrates. They lock up and Ziggler with a side head lock and shoulder tackle. Bryan with an arm drag into an arm bar and Bryan stomps on the elbow.
Ziggler with a drop kick and Big Show tags in. Bryan backs up and he tags in Kane. Show with a punch to Kane but Kane with punches. Kane with more punches but Show fights back with punches. Show with a spear and both men are down. Show punches Kane and gives him a head butt. Show with another head butt.
Show with punches to the ribs but Kane with a punch. Show responds with more punches. Show with an Irish whip but Show runs into a drop kick to the knee. Bryan tags in and he connects with a drop kick that sends Show to his knees. Bryan with Kicks of No to Big Show and then he sets for the final kick but Show blocks it and then he presses Bryan over his head and he sends Bryan to the floor.
We go to commercial.
We are back and Ziggler is working over Bryan and he sends Bryan into Show’s boot and Ziggler gets a one foot cover. Ziggler punches Bryan and he hits a standing drop kick and gets a near fall. Ziggler chokes Bryan and he tags in Show.
Show with the Shhhh chop but it misses. Bryan with chops but Show with a head butt to send Bryan back to the mat. Show with a hard Irish whip and then he misses the running butt splash into the corner. Show grabs Bryan by the throat but Bryan counters with a DDT and both men are down.
Ziggler tags in and he hits a neck breaker. Ziggler with a series of elbow drops and then he pauses before hitting a leaping elbow drop. Ziggler gets a near fall. Show tags back in and he punches Bryan in the ribs. Show with a claw to the abdomen. Bryan with forearms to escape and Show hits a side slam.
Ziggler is tagged back in and he punches Bryan but Bryan with forearms and a drop kick to Show’s knees. Bryan moves when Ziggler goes for a splash into the corner. Kane is tagged in and he goes up top for the clothesline and he hits a running clothesline into the corner followed by another clothesline. Ziggler avoids the side slam but he misses the Fameasser. Kane with a big boot to the head but Ziggler kicks out at two.
Kane with the side slam and he signals for the choke slam but Bryan makes the tag and he tells Kane that he am the Tag Team Champions. Bryan with a running clothesline and running drop kick into the corner. Bryan goes up top and Show grabs Bryan as he gets back to the mat. Kane knocks Show off the apron and Bryan applies the No Lock on Ziggler and Dolph taps out.
Winners: Daniel Bryan and Kane
After the match, Kane and Bryan celebrate on the stage. Damien Sandow and Cody Rhodes attack them from behind and send Kane off the stage. Damien and Cody continue to attack Bryan.
We take a look back at the end of the match between Sheamus and Wade Barrett when Big Show got involved.
We go to commercial.
We are back and before our next match, we go on a tour of Memphis with Antonio Cesaro. He is outside of Sun Studios where many legends of music came from like Jerry Lee Lewis, Johnny Cash, and Elvis Presley. That is why we need him as our United States Champion. Worshipping these country bumpkins with their honking tonking rooting tooting hillbilly music that nobody cares about. Is that what qualifies as a landmark in America? Not on his watch. This building should not be celebrated, it should be demolished. This building is no longer part of Antonio Cesaro’s America.
Match Number Five: Antonio Cesaro versus Ted DiBiase in a Non Title Match
This time there is a USA chant that makes sense. They lock up and Cesaro with a side head lock and shoulder tackle. DiBiase with a drop kick and a sunset flip for a near fall. Cesaro sends DiBiase over the top rope to the floor.
Cesaro follow after DiBiase and hot shots Ted on the apron and returns him to the ring. Cesaro rolls back in and he hits a clothesline and gets a near fall. Cesaro with a deadlift side salto and he gets a near fall. Cesaro with a cravate. Ted with a punch and he hits a rebound clothesline and flying knee. Ted with a sit out spinebuster for a near fall.
Cesaro with an Irish whip but he runs into a boot from Ted. Ted comes off the turnbuckles and Cesaro with an uppercut to Ted and Ted is out. Cesaro with the Gotch Style Neutralizer for the three count.
Winner: Antonio Cesaro
We go to commercial.
We are back with a Raw Rebound.
The Myld Stallyns of Heath Slater, Jinder Mahal, and Drew McIntyre are in the ring. Heath tells everyone that they are looking at the greatest group in history. Drew says that they are the Three Man Band. Slater reminds everyone that they can be called the 3MB. Jinder says that they play beautiful music and rule the game. Heath tells everyone to sit back and watch him destroy Brodus Clay.
Match Number Six: Heath Slater (with Jinder Mahal and Drew McIntyre) versus Brodus Clay (with the Funkettes)
Clay charges into the corner but Slater moves. Slater gets in a few punches but Clay with punches and kicks of his own. Clay with head butts to the back followed by a suplex. Clay with an elbow drop for a near fall. Clay with an Irish whip but he runs into a boot from Slater. Slater with a missile drop kick for a near fall.
Slater with a front face lock but Clay picks Slater up and tosses him to the mat. Clay with a clothesline followed by the Sheeeplex and then Clay hits a running head butt to the midsection. Clay goes after Drew on the apron and then he goes after Jinder. Slater with a kick to the midsection followed by the snap mare front driver for the three count.
Winners: Heath Slater
Matt Striker is in Wade Barrett’s locker room and he asks Wade about the lumberjack match. Wade says that there is some pervading notion that Sheamus is a tough guy. He says that Sheamus is very stupid. In two weeks, Sheamus has a huge match against the Big Show. When you are in that situation, you do not want to be in a match with Wade Barrett, much less a Lumberjack Match. Wade says that Sheamus is saying that he doesn’t want to be World Champion. He says that he is doing a favor for Big Show. When Show wins the title in two weeks, he wants Show to remember because he wants to be paid.
We go to commercial.
We are back and Eve Torres is at the announce table with John and Josh for the next match.
Match Number Six: Layla El versus Natalya
Natalya with a kick and she tries for a power slam but Layla escapes and gets a near fall with a rollup. Natalya is sent to the floor and Layla kicks Natalya off the apron. Layla ignores Natalya and looks at Eve. Natalya attacks Layla from behind and then she kicks Layla when they return to the ring. Natalya with an abdominal stretch and she grabs Layla’s leg to stretch her some more.
Layla with a snap mare followed by a rollup for a near fall. Natalya with a clothesline and she gets a near fall. Layla with the round kick to the head and Layla gets the three count.
Winner: Layla El
We go to the back and Teddy Long shows Kaitlyn some evidence of what Eve has done. Teddy shows Kaitlyn what is on Eve’s iPad and Teddy tells Kaitlyn that she can do whatever she wants with it. Kaitlyn takes some photos and then she tells Teddy that she will confront Eve. Kaitlyn tells Teddy to put the iPad back so Eve doesn’t notice anything happening.
The lumberjacks make their way to the ring and we go to commercial.
Match Number Seven: Sheamus versus Wade Barrett in a Lumberjack Match
Barrett with a kick and forearms to the back followed by kicks in the corner. Sheamus with a punch and forearm. Barrett with an elbow and kick followed by a head butt. Sheamus with a kick to the midsection. Cesaro grabs Sheamus’ leg and Barrett with a back heel kick when Sheamus loses his focus. Barrett sets for a pump handle slam and he hits it.
Barrett gets a near fall. Barrett pulls Sheamus into the ropes and then he kicks Sheamus to the floor. The lumberjacks return Sheamus to the ring without incident and Barrett gets a near fall. Barrett and Sheamus exchange punches. Barrett with boots to Sheamus. Barrett with knees to the midsection followed by a short arm clothesline. Barrett with an Irish whip but Barrett runs into a boot from Sheamus. Sheamus with punches to Barrett but Barrett with an Irish whip that sends Sheamus sternum first into the turnbuckles. Barrett gets a near fall.
We go to commercial.
We are back and Barrett with a knee to Sheamus followed by an Irish whip. Sheamus with two double sledges followed by a running clothesline into the corner and a fireman’s carry slam. Sheamus has Barrett on the apron and he connects with the ten crossfaces. Sheamus pulls Barrett back into the ring and he sets for White Noise and he hits it.
Sheamus looks around and he pounds his chest to set for the Brogue Kick. Slater pulls Barrett to the floor to protect him and Sheamus with a dive onto a mass of heel lumberjacks. Sheamus with a shoulder from the apron and then he Irish whips Barrett. Sheamus with the running shoulder into the corner but Barrett avoids the running knee lift with a back elbow. Barrett with a back heel kick to Sheamus for a near fall.
Both men struggle to get back to their feet and Barrett is the first one up and he tries for Wasteland but Sheamus escapes. Sheamus misses the Brogue Kick and Barrett clotheslines Sheamus over the ropes to the floor. Barrett goes to the floor and then pandemonium breaks out and the lumberjacks battle on the floor.
Barrett and Sheamus return to the ring and Sheamus with the uranage back breaker. Kane’s pyro goes off and he is joined by the man who am the Tag Team Champions, Daniel Bryan. The tag teams around the ring are battling while Sandow and Rhodes try to escape. Sheamus avoids Barrett and Barrett collides with Rhodes. Sheamus with the Brogue Kick for the three count.
After the match, Sandow and Rhodes go into the crowd and leave through the aisles as Kane and Bryan follow after them.
Ziggler hits Sheamus with the Zig Zag. Dolph thinks about cashing in but Big Show nails Ziggler with a punch.
Big Show tells Sheamus to take a good look at Dolph Ziggler because that will be Sheamus’ fate at Hell in a Cell. He will knock Sheamus out and he will take the World Title.
We go to credits.