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CHIKARA 'I'LL BE A MUMMY'S UNCLE' LIVE REPORT FROM RAHWAY, NJ

By Joshua Higham on 2012-04-14 22:19:46
“I’ll Be a Mummy’s Uncle”
Saturday, April 14, 2012
Rahway Rec Center (Rahway, NJ)

Ophidian defeated UltraMantis Black with a small package. Ophidian went under the ring and brought UltraMantis’ staff out with him. As Mantis and Ophidian fought over the staff, Ophidain sprayed black mist in Mantis’ face to allow him to cradle Mantis.

Kobald defeated Saturyne with the Demon's Toilet.

Chuck Taylor and Johnny Gargano got the three points in the four corner elimination tag. Chuck Taylor school boyed a Maximo (couldn’t see which one). They both pinned Jack Bonza after the Bravados hit a double-team elevated overdrive, and then Gargano pinned Lancelot Bravado after the elevated DDT/Hurts Donut combination. This result should make the previously announced match between 3.0 and FIST in Lafayette, IN, for the Campeonatos de Parejas.

Mr. Touchdown defeated Archibald Peck when Peck was disqualified for excesivo de castigo. This was the debut of the Mixed Martial Archie persona. Archie came out wearing his normal tights and cape, but with MMA shorts and a shirt, both advertising Venum. He had a towel over his head and a mouthguard in. A super fun match, which included Peck declaring the end of a round just as Mr. Touchdown mounted some offense, Dasher Hatfield getting ejected from ringside, and senior official Bryce Remsburg falling asleep while Peck locked in a guillotine choke. Veronica came out midmatch and began flirting with Mr. Touchdown, which caused the enraged Peck to begin a ground and pound. When he wouldn’t let up, Remsburg called for the bell. It has been two years since the last time a match has been stopped for excesivo de castigo.

Jigsaw defeated Tim Donst after a superplex. Jig kicked out of 2 From Dusk to Donsts and was able to avoid the shoelace-assisted rear naked choke. Donst was constantly talking to the cameras to Director of Fun Wink Vavasseur and Hallowicked about the Hallowicked and using his finger to simulate a stem on the top of Jigsaw’s mask.

Intermission. Ultramantis Black was the in-ring photo opportunity for the fans.

Jakob Hammermeier defeated Dragonfly with la magistral with his feet up on the ropes. A really short match.

In the Trial of Akuma, Gran Akuma defeated Gregory Iron with a Liger bomb. Referee Jon Barber was knocked out halfway through the match, which prompted Icarus, who was acting as guest timekeeper, to come to the ring and punch Akuma with a chain wrapped around his fist. When Iron wouldn’t capitalize on the interference, Icarus knocked him out too. Iron had his nose busted open after a Tenchi Crash from Akuma near the end of the match.

Sara Del Rey defeated Kodama with a small package. Both Obariyon and Kobald remained at ringside and attempted distractions and interferences liberally.

GEKIDO (17, The Shard, assailANT, and combatANT) defeated The Colony and Eddie Kingston when combatANT pinned Soldier Ant after a TKO. Soldier Ant was going after assailANT's mask when he got caught with the TKO. 17 and the Shard made multiple attempts at Fire Ant and Green Ant’s masks. Very much a brawl, just like the matches GEKIDO was involved in on the events in Canada. GEKIDO entered and exited through the front door. No appearance from deviANT, the third member of the Swarm.

Notes: Bryce Remsburg, Gavin Loudspeaker, Leonard F. Chikarason, and Mike Quackenbush rotated commentary duties while Remsburg and Jon Barber shared referee duties. Larry Dallas, Scott Reed, Mia Yim, and other wrestlers booked for the JAPW show watched from the crowd. Larry Dallas was even approached to participate in Billy Kumohara’s Quiz Present Crisis Battle. Dallas did not know the answer to the question “What does Gekido translate to in English?” Gavin Loudspeaker was doing the hard sell for the events in Easton (May 19), New York City (May 20), and Philadelphia (June 2). But before those events, Chikara returns to action in Chicago Ridge on April 28 and Layafette, IN, on April 29.