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We are live on tape from Tucson, Arizona and your announcers are Josh ‘Signed Epstein’s Mother’ Mathews, Booker ‘Manny Esposito’ T and Michael ‘Sal Garrelli’ Cole.
Big Show makes his way to the ring to address the fans before his big Triple Threat Steel Cage Match on Sunday night.
Show starts off by saying he is sorry. Show says that he already told AJ but he wants to tell everyone else that he is sorry and that he apologized and AJ forgave him immediately. Show wants everyone else to do the same. Show says that he is having trouble forgiving himself. The collision was not an isolated incident. When he was young, he didn’t know his own strength. He always ended up hurting other kids when he was younger. When he came to the WWE, he thought all of that was behind him.
He thought that being a freak and things not being his fault would go away when he came to the WWE. Show says that he loves what he does. Show says that he has been here for thirteen years and he loves his job.
After what happened to AJ, he says that he doesn’t have the heart to go on with his career. Show says that he is very honored and proud to be in the Triple Threat Match on Sunday, but after Sunday he is going to have to do some soul searching . . .
Daniel Bryan’s music interrupts Show and Daniel makes his way to the ring and it does not look like Show apologized to him.
Bryan stands face to pec with Show and he says that everything is okay because Show is sorry. Bryan tells Show that he put a 95 pound woman in the hospital. Show says that it was an accident. Bryan says that AJ may have accepted the apology, but she was heavily medicated and does not even remember the visit.
Bryan says that he remembers because he remembers everything. Bryan says that he always thought that the WWE was a place for athletes, not genetic freaks. Bryan tells Show not to mention Andre because Show is no Andre the Giant.
Bryan tells everyone that Show has them fooled. Show has no plans to reassess his career. It is empty talk just like all of the apologies. If Show was really repentant, he would not be apologizing to AJ, him, or the people. Show would do the honorable thing and retire right now. Bryan pokes the giant and he tells him to do the right thing and leave.
Bryan slaps Show in the face and Show looks like he wants to pull of Bryan’s head. Bryan slaps Show again and Show grabs Bryan by the throat and he backs him into the corner. Show tells Bryan that what happened to AJ was an accident. He calls Bryan an ass and then he tells Bryan that what happens on Sunday will not be.
Mark Henry’s music plays and he makes his way to the ring because he is in the Triple Threat Match on Sunday and shouldn’t be kept out of the segment.
Henry says that he was compelled to come out and remind Bryan and Show that it is a Triple Threat Steel Cage Match on Sunday. Henry says that he doesn’t care about Show’s hurt feelings. He doesn’t care about Bryan’s Napoleon Complex. He sure doesn’t care about some 95 pound girl in a training bra. Henry says that Show knows what he is capable of so he doesn’t have to sweet talk him. Henry tells Bryan to get in his face if he wants to talk to him.
Henry tells Bryan that after weaseling out of the title match last week, he is going to rip off his skin on principle.
Bryan blames the lumberjacks for what happened.
Before Mark can do anything, Interim Boyfriend of Aksana and General Manager of Smackdown Teddy Long comes out and he tells the playas in the ring that they are a few days from the Royal Rumble. Teddy says that Wade Barrett is going to face Randy Orton tonight in a main event, we might as well have another main event. Since Daniel Bryan faced the Big Show two weeks ago and he faced Mark Henry last week, so it is only fair that Mark Henry faces the Big Show tonight.
We see the Barrett Barrage: Viper Hunt Edition video package.
We go to commercial.
We are back and we go to the Goldman Box where Cody says that through the kindness of his heart, he is giving the Wish Troll meets Jap-Anime reject a non-title match. He says that Justin can tell his grandkids that he lost to the man who won the Royal Rumble Match.
Match Number One: Cody Rhodes versus Justin Gabriel in a Non Title Match
Rhodes with a kick but Gabriel flips over Rhodes’ back and he hits a round kick for a near fall. Rhodes hits the Alabama Slam for a near fall. Rhodes with kicks to Gabriel and then he knees Gabriel and hits a side Russian leg sweep. Rhodes with an arm bar. Gabriel with a punch and monkey flip followed by a kick to the leg and chest. Gabriel with a jumping back spin kick and a flying forearm.
Rhodes rolls to the floor and Gabriel hits a corkscrew pescado and then sends Rhodes back into the ring. Gabriel with a springboard cross body and Rhodes rolls through and gets a near fall. Gabriel with an STO and then he tries for the springboard moonsault but Rhodes moves. Gabriel lands on his feet but Rhodes with Beautiful Disaster followed by Cross Rhodes for the three count.
Winner: Cody Rhodes
Santino is talking to Teddy in the office and he says that he has the perfect match. He says that it is an Extreme Loser Leaves Town Match where the loser has to join a group of monkeys, go into a spaceship and leave the planet Earth. Teddy says that he isn’t going to do that. Yoshi is in and he says that it is out of the world.
Santino says that he wants to introduce Teddy to the next Tag Team Champions, Santoshi.
Yoshi says they are Yoshitino.
They duck season/rabbit season for a while until the man who has been fired more times than Billy Martin, Drew McIntyre enters the office. Teddy says that Drew’s career has been on thin ice. Teddy points out that Drew said that he would be able to beat Santino in a blindfold match, but he couldn’t even win after cheating.
Drew tells Teddy that Babe Ruth struck out five times in a game. Teddy tells Drew that he might have struck out, but more often than not, Babe knocked it out of the park. Teddy tells Drew that he will have to knock it out of the park against Sheamus tonight.
Drew thanks Teddy for the opportunity and then Teddy tells Drew to batter up because his match is next.
We go to commercial.
Match Number Two: Drew McIntyre versus Sheamus in a This Time We Really Mean That You Will Be Fired If You Lose Match . . . We Really Do
Sheamus blocks a punch and Sheamus with punches. Drew with a kick and punches. Sheamus blocks a hip toss and Sheamus with a short arm clothesline for a near fall. Sheamus sends Drew into the turnbuckles and Irish whips him. Drew with a kick but Sheamus with the rolling fireman’s carry slam and gets a near fall. Drew goes to the apron and Sheamus grabs him and Drew drops Sheamus on the top rope.
Drew with a drop kick to Sheamus. Drew with the Neverending Story in the corner followed by a Northern Lights suplex for a near fall. Drew with an arm bar but Sheamus with punches. Drew with a suplex and he gets a near fall. Drew with a kick to the back. Sheamus with a series of forearms to the back followed by a short arm clothesline and a few double sledges. Sheamus with a power slam.
Drew with a punch to the head but Sheamus with the Brogue Kick for the three count.
Winner: Sheamus
We go to commercial.
We are back with the Royal Rumble By the Numbers video package.
We have the WWE Rewind: Last week’s Texas Tornado Tag Match between the Usos and the tag champions.
Rosa Mendes es en La Caja De Goldman and she says two months ago, nobody knew Epico and Primo, but now they are tag team champions.
Match Number Three: Santino Marella and Yoshi Tatsu versus Epico and Hunico with Rosa Mendes in a Non Title Match
Santino and Yoshi bow with no end in sight. Santino and Primo start things off and Santino with a hip lock take down and then he floats over and then does the trombone after celebrating his achievement. Santino with a drop toe hold and Yoshi is tagged in and he hits a double sledge and then chops Primo. Primo kicks Yoshi and Epico makes the blind tag. Yoshi chops Primo and Epico hits him from behind.
Epico with a butterfly suplex and he gets a near fall. Epico with a rear chin lock but Yoshi punches Epico. Yoshi with a backslide for a near fall. Santino tags in and he punches Epico and does a split followed by a hip toss and a diving head butt for a near fall but Primo breaks up the cover. Primo clotheslines Yoshi over the top rope to the floor.
Primo turns around and gets hit with the Cobra but Epico is the legal man in the match and he hits the lungblower for the three count.
Winners: Epico and Primo
Mark Henry is getting ready for his match and Daniel Bryan stops by. Henry tells Daniel that he better have a good reason to be here after what happened last week. Daniel Bryan says that last week was because of Teddy Long since he sent out the lumberjacks. Daniel says that this week is on Teddy too. Daniel says that he was going to give Mark a rematch because he respects him. Daniel wants to talk about the Big Show and says that Show does not belong in the match on Sunday. Daniel says that Teddy wants Show to be the champion and that is why he is in the match on Sunday.
Henry wants to know what Bryan’s point is.
Daniel says that this is the last opportunity to right an obvious wrong. We know that Mark can pin Big Show, but he needs to hurt him. Daniel asks Mark how many people Show has injured and then Bryan points out that Show even hurt his girlfriend. Daniel says that for the good of every Superstar in the WWE, someone has to teach Show a valuable lesson and Mark is the person to teach him that lesson.
We go to commercial.
We are back and before our next match, Wade Barrett with his Black Barrage Blazer comes to the ring. Wade asks for some decorum in the building. He says that there is a lot of pageantry and emotion attached to tonight’s Smackdown. It must be due to the return of the Viper. Wade says that he has it on authority that Orton is letting his ego get the best of him. He might be physically ready to go, but he is broken spiritually.
You don’t go through what Orton did and come out the same person. It is time for a video package of the Barrage.
Barrett says that it looked like Orton had fallen and he couldn’t get up. That is why Orton is a shell of a man. The voices in Orton’s head are telling him that Barrett is a vicious competitor.
Randy Orton’s music plays and he is walking through the back.
Match Number Four: Wade Barrett versus Randy Orton
They fight in the ramp and then Orton with a clothesline when they enter the ring. Orton with a clothesline into the corner and then he punches Barrett. Officials come to the ring to break up a scheduled match.
Barrett gets out of the ring but Orton catches up to Barrett and hits him from behind. Orton sends Barrett into the apron and he punches him. Orton spits his venom at the referees and they back off.
Teddy Long appears on the stage and he half-heartedly waves some wrestlers to come out to restore some order.
Curt Hawkins, Trent Barreta, and Tyler Reks make their way to the ring and they do about as well as the referees.
Barrett punches Orton while they hold him. Barrett gets into the ring and Orton follows after him and he spears Barrett. People come into he ring to break things up and we have pandemonium as Barrett escapes.
Orton is held off by Reks, Hawkins, Barreta, and the Usos. Orton thanks them for being peacekeepers by getting RKOed. Reks is first, followed by Hawkins. Barrett leaves and Barreta gets one. The Usos feel left out and they get RKOed.
We go to commercial.
We are back with another Royal Rumble Flashback and it is to 2006 when Rey Mysterio set the record for longest time in the Rumble match that was previously held by someone.
Daniel Bryan is in the back with Kaitlyn and he tells her that she needs to do a favor for AJ since they are best friends. Bryan tells Kaitlyn to tell Show that Mark Henry is going to try to injure him tonight in the match to keep Show out of the match at the Royal Rumble.
Kaitlyn wants to know if she is doing AJ or Daniel a favor. Bryan points out that AJ loves Daniel. Kaitlyn agrees but she wants Daniel to tell her how he really feels about AJ. Bryan says that he is a private person and that Show needs to talk to Kaitlyn as soon as possible.
We see footage from last week’s Flag Match between Ted DiBiase and Hunico.
Match Number Four: Hunico with Camacho versus Ted DiBiase
Ted’s hand is taped up and he avoids Hunico and connects with a hip toss and clothesline. Ted with a boot to the head for a near fall. Hunico punches Ted’s wrist and then he takes Ted to the mat and he connects with a leg drop to the arm and he applies an arm bar. Ted with punches and then he hits the rebound clothesline.
Ted tries for Dream Street but Hunico is able to escape due to Ted’s injury. Hunico with an arm breaker and then he hits a twisting fireman’s carry slam for the three count.
Winner: Hunico
After the match, Hunico signals Camacho and they attack Ted. Camacho with forearms to the back and Ted writhes in pain against the ringside barrier. Camacho holds Ted’s arm while Hunico stomps on the broken wrist.
We go to the back where Aksana’s music and lighting precede her appearance on screen in Teddy’s office. Teddy excuses himself to do something and Natalya storms in and forces normal lighting in the office. Natalya wants a rematch against Tamina. Aksana say that she saw Tamina squash Natalya like grape a few weeks ago. Natalya says that she will beat that whack job and then she will take care of Aksana.
Aksana tell Natalya that what she do with Teddy in private . . . Teddy interrupts by telling Aksana to kayfabe their relationship.
Teddy tells Aksana since she wants to compete, she will face Natalya. Natalya tells Aksana that she cannot wait to make Aksana cry.
There is a questionable noise in the office and Natalya runs away.
Teddy says that he needs to check on Ted DiBiase. Aksana leaves with Teddy. Santino enters and he smells something bad.
We go to commercial.
We are back and Alex Riley is in the ring and he is going to have to feel the Funk in a few minutes.
Before our next match, we see the moment that William Regal made his play for the next season of Dancing with the Stars only to have Brodus hit the cross body.
Match Number Five: Alex Riley versus Brodus Clay with the Funkettes
Alex wants to show his dance moves and Brodus does the Shimmy before hitting an Exploder suplex and then Brodus with a splash into the corner and then he hits the cross body for the three count.
Winner: Brodus Clay
After the match, it is time for the Funkettes to join Brodus in the ring to dance.
We go to commercial.
We are back with the Raw Rebound.
Match Number Six: Aksana versus Natalya
Natalya looks for Tamina and Aksana with a rollup for the three count.
Winner: Aksana
After the match, Natalya attacks Aksana from behind and she puts Aksana in the Sharpshooter and Aksana taps out.
Tamina comes to the ring and she hits a Samoan drop and then Tamina goes up top for the Superfly Splash.
We go to commercial.
Match Number Seven: Big Show versus Mark Henry
Before the match starts, the World Heavyweight Champion makes his way to ringside to watch the match and see his opponents for Sunday up close and personal.
Show with a kick and forearms followed by a head butt and Henry goes to the floor. Show goes after Henry and he kicks and punches Henry. Show puts Henry back into the ring and he connects with a head butt. Show with chops to Henry. Henry with punches and Henry lands awkwardly and the referee checks on him.
We go to commercial with Henry on the ground.
We are back and Daniel Bryan enters the ring while Big Show is declared the winner by count out.
Winner: Big Show by count out
Bryan hits Show with the chair and then Show biels Bryan and leaves the ring.
Bryan gets his title belt and Show goes after him with the chair. Bryan back pedals and then he tosses the belt to Show and hits a drop kick. Bryan hits Show with the chair and then he chokes Show with the chair. Bryan continues to attack Show’s leg with the chair.
They go back into the ring and Bryan applies the LeBell Lock. Show powers out of the hold and Show choke slams Bryan and he gets ready to knock out Bryan but Daniel gets out of the ring and crawls up the ramp to safety.
We go to credits.
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