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WWE SMACKDOWN REPORT: THE BIGGEST WWE BATTLE ROYAL; SIN CARAS BRAWL; I THINK CHRISTIAN IS GOING TO NEED A BIGGER BOAT TO GO AFTER THE GREAT WHITE; AND THINGS ARE RIGHT IN THE DIVA DIVISION

By Richard Trionfo on 2011-10-14 22:00:52
We start off this week’s show with a look back at the return of Big Show after his injury at the hands (and the rest) of Mark Henry. We hear Show’s comments and then we see how Show earned a title match after being out of the ring since Money in the Bank.

We are live on tape from Dallas, Texas and your announcers are Michael ‘I am Spartacus’ Cole, Josh ‘I am Sparcatus’ Mathews, and Booker ‘I am going to need a bathroom break’ T.

We start off with the General Manager of Smackdown Teddy Long and he makes his way to the stage. He is joined by the interim General Manager of Raw John Laurinaitis. They shake hands and Teddy says that they are all going to be part of history. This episode of Smackdown moves into second place on the longest running programs. John mentions that they are now second only to Raw. John says that he is excited to be here not only as the Executive Vice President of Talent Relations and the Raw General Manager to give his support.

Teddy says that with all of the superstars under one roof, what better way to celebrate than with the largest battle royal in WWE history. John says that the winner of the battle royal will have a title match against the champion of his choosing on Smackdown.

Teddy wants a holla holla holla from the people of Dallas.

Match Number One: Forty-One Man Battle Royal for a Title Match of the Winner’s Choosing Later Tonight

The participants in the battle royal are CM Punk, John Morrison, Alex Riley, Curt Hawkins, Dolph Ziggler, Kofi Kingston, Zack Ryder, Tyler Reks, Drew McIntyre, Mason Ryan, David Otunga, Primo, JTG, Michael McGillicutty, Percy Watson, Jack Swagger, Miz, R Truth, Santino Marella, Christian, Daniel Bryan Cody Rhodes, Ezekiel Jackson, Yoshi Tatsu, Wade Barrett, Jinder Mahal, Sin Cara El Terrible, Heath Slater, Ted DiBiase, Justin Gabriel, Derrick Bateman, Trent Barreta, Johnny Curtis, William Regal, Tyson Kidd, Jimmy Uso, Jey Uso, Matt Striker, Sheamus, Titus O’Neil, and Randy Orton.

As the wrestlers enter the ring, it is hard to find available space for the final few participants.

The bell rings and everyone except Dolph Ziggler battle in the ring while Ziggler waits on the apron. Cody Rhodes is the first man eliminated thanks to Randy Orton. There are few things other than punches and kicks going on as we have two score of wrestlers remaining in the match. Johnny Curtis is sent to the apron and he is eliminated by Drew McIntyre.

Sheamus tries to eliminate Jack Swagger while John Morrison makes his way to the apron and he tries to help get Swagger out of the ring. Swagger tries to eliminate Orton and Orton goes to the apron. Morrison suplexes Yoshi to the apron while on the other side of the ring, JTG is eliminated. Kofi eliminates Michael McGillicutty followed shortly by Derrick Bateman on the list of eliminated wrestlers.

Titus saves his tag team partner Percy Watson from elimination, but Titus is not so lucky as Jack Swagger sends him to the floor. Titus joins Yoshi Tatsu who was also eliminated. Jack Sawgger is sent to the apron by Ted DiBiase. Matt Striker is eliminated so half of the announcers in this match are gone with William Regal their only hope.

Sheamus and Percy Watson send John Morrison back to the apron. Justin Gabriel sends Primo over the top rope but Dolph Ziggler may have inadvertently saved Primo because Primo hits Ziggler and Primo stays on the apron. Orton tries to eliminate Christian but he holds on to the ropes as we go to commercial.

We are back and it is your guess as to whether or not any wrestlers were eliminated during the commercial break because there is a huge mass of humanity still in the ring. Ziggler is on the apron and he tries to suplex Morrison to the floor but Morrison blocks it and he drops Ziggler on the top rope but Dolph is able to maintain his balance on the apron.

Josh informs us that there are thirty-two men left in the battle royal meaning that one person was eliminated during the commercial break. We have more punches and kicks while Sin Cara goes after Mason Ryan. Alex Riley sends Justin Gabriel to the apron and Tyson Kidd tries to help eliminate Gabriel. Meanwhile, on another side of the ring, William Regal is eliminated.

Sheamus tries to eliminate Otunga while Punk is trying to help Daniel Bryan to the floor but the Money in the Bank holder is doing his best to remain in the ring. Percy Watson is eliminated. Dolph Ziggler and Jack Swagger work as a team to eliminate John Morrison. Ryder eliminates Dolph Ziggler and Ziggler wants to get back into the ring. Ryder and DiBiase try to eliminate McIntyre.

Punk continues to try to eliminate Bryan and he elbows him in the back. Trent Barreta is eliminated. Bryan is able to get back into the ring thanks to Orton going after Punk. Miz and Truth eliminate Jimmy Uso while Santino tries to eliminate Jey. Punk and Orton continue to battle by the ropes and Punk goes to the apron. Ted DiBiase is eliminated. Tyson Kidd is also eliminated. Bryan kicks Gabriel and then Gabriel and McIntyre battle by the ropes.

We go to commercial.

We are back and Ryder is trying to eliminate Christian. Daniel Bryan is eliminated. Punk sends Reks to the apron and Gabriel is sent to the apron but neither man is eliminated yet. Primo is sent to the apron but he rolls back into the ring. Sheamus sends Ryder over the top rope but Ryder holds on to the ropes to stay in the match.

Reks is eliminated by Mason Ryan and then he eliminates Curt Hawkins too. Miz and Truth work over Punk in the corner. McIntyre is eliminated by Mason Ryan as well. Ryan adds to the list by eliminated Justin Gabriel with a press slam. Mason Ryan is eliminated by Wade Barrett as the man from England eliminates the man from Wales.

Truth and Miz wait for something to happen but Primo is sent to the apron by CM Punk and then Punk eliminates Primo with a kick to the head. Santino is sent over the top rope but he skins the cat and gets back to the apron. Santino uncoils the cobra, but that chicanery costs him because while he was doing that, Christian with a punch that sends Santino to the floor.

Riley has Miz on the apron and he punches his former mentor while Truth comes from behind to try to stop him. Riley punches Truth. Miz pulls the ropes down and Truth sends Riley over the top rope. Miz wishes Riley well. Sheamus punches Slater while Jey Uso works over Otunga. Barrett goes after Sheamus and may have accidentally saved Heath Slater as Barrett tries to become the last European in the match.

Kofi is sent over the rope but he skins the cat. Kofi tries to send Swagger over the top rope with a head scissors but Swagger holds on and he puts Kofi in the ankle lock. Swagger kicks Kofi to the floor. Zack Ryder is eliminated as we are down to fourteen.

David Otunga brings us down to an unlucky thirteen as Sheamus eliminates him. Sheamus eliminates Jey Uso. Jackson gets Sheamus up in the torture rack but Sheamus escapes and Sheamus clotheslines Jackson over the top rope to the floor. Sheamus sends Slater over the top rope but he holds on and stays on the apron. It might not have been a smart idea for Slater because Sheamus with a Brogue Kick that sends Slater off the apron and into the ringside barrier as he is eliminated.

We are down to ten men and they are Sheamus, Sin Cara The Not So Nice, Jack Swagger, Wade Barrett, CM Punk, Randy Orton, Christian, Jinder Mahal, Miz, and R Truth.

Sheamus blocks a rana attempt by Sin Cara and Sheamus sends Cara to the floor and he lands on Jackson, Uso, and Otunga before his feet hit the floor to eliminate him. Christian waits for Sheamus to turn around for the spear but Christian probably didn’t realize that Sheamus was looking at the TitanTron that showed Christian waiting to pounce on Sheamus so Sheamus is able to kick Christian. Sheamus gets Christian up for the Celtic Cross but Christian escapes the hold and Christian tries to eliminate Sheamus.

Sheamus eliminates Christian. Mahal with a clothesline to Sheamus while Punk takes turns kicking Truth and Miz. Punk sends Miz into Truth’s midsection and Punk throws Truth over the top rope to eliminate him and then Miz comes from behind and eliminates Punk.

Sheamus with a Brogue Kick to Miz as we are down to six. Miz is down in the corner while Barrett attacks Sheamus in one corner and Mahal and Swagger battle in the other corner. Randy Orton is nowhere to be found. Barrett and Swagger are the ones in control. Punk and Truth battle on the floor while Christian comes back into the ring and sends Sheamus over the top rope and he is eliminated. Sheamus realizes what happened and he goes after Christian who leaves the ring and runs away.

Orton returns to the ring and he eliminates Barrett. Orton with an RKO to Swagger and then he throws Jack over the top rope. Orton with an RKO to Mahal and then he eliminates Jinder. We are down to our final two and it is Miz and Randy Orton. Miz comes from behind and he throws Orton over the top rope but he did not get enough distance to send Orton off the apron to the floor so Orton rolls back in and while Miz thinks that he won, he turns around and sees that Orton is still on the apron. Miz kicks Orton in the corner.

Miz with knees to Orton and then he hits a knee lift. Miz waits for the Awesome clothesline but Orton recover and hits a few clotheslines of his own followed by a power slam. Orton pounds the mat for an RKO but Miz is able to counter and set for the Skull Crushing Finale. Orton is able to roll through and get out of the hold. Orton with a kick and then he sends Miz to the apron. Miz with a shoulder and he back body drops Orton onto the apron. Miz and Orton exchange punches on the apron. Miz pushes Orton into the ring post but Orton recovers and kicks Miz followed by an RKO on the apron that forces Miz to hit the floor a few fractions of a second before Orton falls to the floor as the winner.

Winner: Randy Orton

Orton celebrates his victory in the ring while the announcers wonder who Orton will face.

Josh Mathews goes into the ring to congratulate Randy Orton and find out who Orton will be facing later tonight. Randy says that decision is quite easy because on Monday night he said that vengeance would be his. Orton says that he chooses Mark Henry. Randy says that not only will vengeance be his, but he will take back his World Heavyweight Championship.

Kelly Kelly walks in the back with Eve Torres as we go to commercial.

We are back and Alberto Del Rio walks through the back with Ricardo Rodriguez. They are stopped by Teddy Long because Teddy wants to know where they are going. Alberto says that Randy Orton chose Mark Henry because Orton did not think that he could beat the WWE Champion. Alberto says that he does not blame Orton and then he says that he has no reason to be here.

Teddy says that before Alberto gets his party started, he will wrestle Sheamus.

Teddy walks away from Alberto and Ricardo.

Match Number Two: Beth Phoenix with Natalya versus Kelly Kelly with Eve Torres

Beth backs Kelly into the corner and Beth chokes Kelly. Beth misses a charge into the corner and Kelly with kicks to Beth. Kelly with the screaming head scissors but Beth counters with a back breaker. Beth with a kick and she gets a near fall. Kelly with forearms followed by a Thesz Press and punches. Kelly with another forearm and then she hits a DDT and gets a near fall.

Kelly sets for the handspring elbow into the corner but Beth sends Kelly over the top rope to the apron. Beth pulls Kelly into the ring for the Glam Slam and she hits it and gets the three count.

Winner: Beth Phoenix

We go to commercial.

We are back and we see the TitanTron video for Sin Cara The Happy but he does not come to the ring for his vintage entrance. Instead, we cut to the back where Sin Cara El Terrible is attacking Sin Cara El Bueno. People have to break things up but Cara Black is able to take the other Sin Cara’s mask. He takes off his mask and then he puts his mask down and takes Sin Cara Bueno’s mask and puts it on.

Match Number Three: Justin Gabriel versus Sin Cara Terrible (con la mascara del Bueno)

Cara with a kick and punch followed by a knee and chop. Cara with a forearm but Gabriel with a drop kick that sends Cara to the floor. Gabriel with a corkscrew pescado onto Cara and they return to the ring. Gabriel tries for a springboard move but Cara with a drop kick for a near fall.

Cara with kicks and punches but Gabriel with punches of his own. Gabriel with a Blue Thunder Bomb for a near fall. Gabriel goes up top but Cara crotches Gabriel and Gabriel falls to the mat. Cara goes up and hits the swanton for the three count.

Winner: Sin Cara Black

Teddy Long is in his office with the WWE Tag Team Champions Evan Bourne and Kofi Kingston. Teddy mentions that they are doing a great job, but he is worried about Evan’s safety so he will not be able to compete tonight. Evan appreciates that but there is someone off camera who does not show the same sentiment as Teddy.

Vickie enters the office and she is feigning sadness over Evan’s health. Vickie reminds Teddy that Swagger and Ziggler defeated Kofi and Evan last week so she is demanding that they get their title match tonight.

Teddy says that he will not do that tonight.

Zack Ryder woo woo woos and he enters the office. He tells Vickie that he heard what she was saying and since he is the assistant to the general manager, Swagger and Ziggler should face Kofi and him.

Vickie tells Zack that he better watch out because Dolph is gunning for him.

Teddy wishes everyone in the room luck in the match and he throws out a holla. Zack responds with a woo woo woo. We get a ‘duck season . . . rabbit season’ moment with Zack and Teddy until Vickie leaves.

We go to commercial.

Match Number Four: Alberto Del Rio with Ricardo Rodriguez versus Sheamus

They lock up and Sheamus with a side head lock and shoulder tackle for a near fall. Del Rio misses a punch but Sheamus with a shoulder tackle and then he sends Alberto into the turnbuckles. Sheamus puts Del Rio in the ropes and he connects with a series of forearms across the chest. Sheamus with a short arm clothesline for a near fall. Sheamus misses a charge into the turnbuckles and then Del Rio with a missile drop kick and then he punches Sheamus in the head and he kicks Sheamus.

Del Rio with an arm bar and he kicks the leg to take away Sheamus’ vertical base. Del Rio turns it into a key lock but Sheamus with punches to get out of the hold. Del Rio with a single arm buster and then he returns to the key lock. Sheamus with punches to Del Rio but Del Rio with a shot to the head.

Del Rio runs into an elbow and then Sheamus with a series of running double sledges and then he hits a pump handle power slam. Sheamus with a clothesline into the corner followed by a uranage back breaker for a near fall. Sheamus goes up top for the flying shoulder tackle but Ricardo gets on the apron. Sheamus punches Ricardo and while the referee was distracted, Christian crotches Sheamus.

Del Rio with the step up enzuigiri that sends Sheamus to the mat. Del Rio with a kick to the head and he gets the three count.

Winner: Alberto Del Rio

After the match, Christian picks up the spare and hits the spear on Sheamus. Christian leaves the ring but he sees Sheamus get up so he returns to the ring and he spears Sheamus again.

Sheamus and Christian have a stare down with Christian on the stage and Sheamus in the ring.

We go to commercial.

We are back and Vickie Guerrero comes out to introduce Jack Swagger and Dolph Ziggler.

Match Number Five: Zack Ryder and Kofi Kingston with Evan Bourne versus Dolph Ziggler and Jack Swagger with Vickie Guerrero

Swagger and Ryder start things off and they lock up with Swagger putting Ryder in a side head lock. Swagger with a shoulder tackle but Ryder with a flapjack. Ryder sends Swagger into the turnbuckles but Swagger with a belly-to-belly suplex before tagging Ziggler in. Ziggler kicks Ryder and hits a neck breaker for a near fall.

Dolph taunts Ryder about making a tag but he kicks Ryder and applies a rear chin lock. Ryder gets back to his feet but Ziggler with a kick. Ryder drives Ziggler’s head into the mat and Kofi tags in and hits a springboard clothesline on Ziggler before knocking Swagger off the apron. Kofi with a clothesline and chop to Ziggler followed by a drop kick and a Superman punch. Kofi sets for the Boom Drop and he hits it. Kofi sets for Trouble in Paradise but Swagger pulls Ziggler out of the ring. Kofi hits a suicide dive onto Swagger and Ziggler as we go to commercial.

We are back and Ziggler with an arm bar on Kofi as the momentum has changed during the commercial break. We see Swagger pulling Kofi off the ropes while Vickie distracted the referee. Back to the action in the ring and Ziggler with kicks to Kofi’s leg followed by a Fameasser for a near fall.

Swagger tags back in and he kick and punches Kofi. Swagger with a belly-to-back suplex and he gets a near fall. Swagger with a double over hook on Kofi’s arm but Kofi escapes and he punches Swagger and connects with a forearm. Swagger catches Kofi when he tried to make the tag and Swagger puts Kofi on the turnbuckles. Swagger slaps Kofi but Kofi slaps back.

Kofi hits a tornado DDT and both men are down. Each man crawls to make the tag. Ziggler tags first and then Ryder tags in. Ryder with running double forearm to the throat. Ryder with the running boot to the head in the corner but Ryder can only get a two count. Ziggler with a drop kick that sends Ryder into the corner but Ryder gets his knees up when Ziggler charges.

Ryder sets for the Rough Ryder but Ziggler is able to move out of the way and he tries for the sleeper and he locks it in. Ryder runs towards the corner and forces Ziggler into the turnbuckles and ring post. Swagger runs across the ring and knocks Ziggler off the apron. While the referee deals with Swagger, Kofi gets into the ring and he hits Trouble in Paradise on Ziggler and Kofi puts Ryder on top of Ziggler for the three count.

Winners: Zack Ryder and Kofi Kingston

It is time to take a look back at what happened on Monday night.

We go to commercial.

We are back and Matt Striker is in the interview area with Sheamus. Matt asks Sheamus about what Christian did tonight and whether Christian has gotten into his head. Sheamus says that Christian is a pain in his arse that he can’t get rid of. He says that Christian reminds him of a troll named Gilby. It was a troll that was ugly dimwitted, and slow. The troll bit a man crossing a bridge in his arse. It happened until a great white bull crossed the bridge and the troll tried to do the same, but the bull kicked the troll off the bridge. Sheamus says that the next time he sees Christian he will kick his slow dimwitted face off his skull.

We take a look back at the return of Big Show, in case you missed it at the start of the show.

We see footage of what Cody Rhodes did to Randy Orton on Raw, including the bagging of Orton.

Match Number Six: Mark Henry versus Randy Orton for the World Heavyweight Championship

They lock up and Henry backs Orton in the corner but he misses a punch. Orton with a few jabs to Henry and he backs off. Henry backs Orotn into the corner but he misses aiwth another punch. Henry with an Irish whip but Orton with a clothesline out of the corner but Henry stays on his feet. Orton with punches to Henry and then he tries for a head butt but it looks like Orton gets the worst of it. Orton with a European uppercut and Henry stays on his feet. Orton with kicks that force Henry to his knees.

Henry pushes Orton to the floor and Henry goes out after Orton. Orton punches Henry as they fight by the ringside barrier. Henry with a head butt and then he sends Orton shoulder first into the ring post.

They return to the ring and Orton gets a near fall. Henry punches Orton in the midsection followed by another head butt and a forearm to the neck. Henry with a nerve hold on Orton and he applies his weight to the hold. Orton gets to his feet and he gets out of the hold and he punches Henry but Henry with a shoulder tackle.

Henry stands on Orton’s back and the referee warns Henry. Henry with a head butt and he returns to the nerve hold. Orton gets to his feet again and Orton with punches to the midsection followed by a head butt but Orton still a little groggy. Orton puts Henry in the corner and he kicks and punches him. The referee pulls Orton out of the corner and Henry with a body block followed by an elbow drop for a near fall.

We go to commercial.

We are back and Henry with a head butt to Orton in the corner. Henry gets Orton up for a running power slam and he hits it and Henry can only get a two count because of a rather lackadaisical cover. Henry chokes Orton in the ropes and then he stands on Orton’s head. Henry with a head butt and slam to Orton. Orton goes for a splash and he hits it but Orton is able to get a shoulder up.

Henry pulls Orton into the corner as Henry climbs for the Vader Splash but Orton gets his boots up and Orton with a clothesline but Henry stays on his feet. Orton with another clothesline and Orton is still unable to get Henry down, but Orton with a drop kick and he succeeds.

Cody Rhodes comes to the ring and Orton goes after Cody while Henry is down. The referee lets this continue as Orton sets for an IEDDT but Henry hits Orton from behind and the referee calls for the bell.

Winner: Randy Orton by disqualification

After the referee calls for the bell, Henry and Rhodes work over Orton with Rhodes getting in the majority of the offense. Cody leaves the ring and he picks up a bag on the floor and he kicks Orton.

Big Show comes to the ring and while Cody gets out of the ring, Henry waits for Show to get in the ring. Show punches Henry followed by a shoulder tackle. Cody goes up top and as he comes off the turnbuckles, Show grabs him by the throat and Show passes Rhodes to Orton for an assist on the RKO. Henry goes for Show’s knee but Orton gets in the way. Orton feeds Henry to Show and Show hits the choke slam.

I think we have a tag match for next week as we go to credits.

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