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We are live on tape from Portland, Oregon and your announcers are Matt ‘I know 33 people who aren’t Cole Miners’ Striker, Todd ‘Can I Talk This Week’ Grisham, and Michael ‘Like a Virus’ Cole.
All three men wonder what Taker is doing on the roof and what it means for later tonight.
Teddy Long is in the ring and he has an announcement to make. He says that it is that time of year again. Not Christmas, but Bragging Rights. Last year, Smackdown brought the Bragging Rights trophy home and this year will be no different. We see the six men and the mysterious seventh man on Team Raw on the TitanTron. Teddy reminds us that Big Show is the team captain for Team Smackdown. He says that we will find out in a series of qualifying matches tonight.
Match Number One: Rey Mysterio versus ‘Dashing’ Cody Rhodes in a Team Smackdown Qualifying Match
Cody works on the wrist and arm that Alberto Del Rio previously injured. Rey rolls through and uses the ropes to escape with an arm drag. Rey runs towards Rhodes and Cody with a punch and Cody gets a near fall. Cody with a punch to the face and then he hits a gourdbuster on Rey and gets a near fall. Rhodes kicks Rey’s arm and then he connects with a forearm that knocks Rey back to the mat. Cody tries for a suplex but Rey escapes. Rey with a drop kick to the knees and Rhodes falls into the ropes. Rey starts the run for the 619 but Cody goes to the floor and we go to commercial.
We are back and Rhodes with a rear chin lock on Rey and he has his knee in Rey’s back. We see footage from the commercial break when Rey tried for a springboard move but Cody countered with a round kick that knocked Rey down. Rey gets to his feet and he counters and gets a near fall with a bridge. Cody with a drop kick and he gets a near fall. Cody with a knee to the back as he applies a surfboard. Rey with kicks but Cody blocks a punch and applies a cross face chicken wing and body scissors on Mysterio as he works on the injured arm some more. Rey struggles to get to the ropes but he is successful in getting Cody to break the hold. Cody with kicks to the arm and then he punches Rey in the head.
Rhodes with a rolling knee drop to the back of the head and he gets a near fall. Rhodes with a punches to Rey after pushing Rey into the ropes. It works a second time but Rey with a kick on the third attempt. Cody tries for a wheelbarrow suplex and he hits it. Cody makes the cover but he takes too long and Rey kicks out. Cody pulls Rey towards the corner and Cody goes to the turnbuckles for a knee drop but Rey moves out of the way. Rey with a drop toe hold that sends Cody into the turnbuckles. Rey goes up top with a seated senton. Rey with a springboard cross body but Cody rolls through and gets a near fall on Rey.
Rhodes with a punch to the midsection and then he gets a sunset flip but Rey rolls through and kicks Cody to get a near fall. Rey with a drop kick to the knee one more time and then he hits a springboard leg drop on Rhodes but he can only get a two count. Rhodes with a drop down uppercut and then he tries for the Alabama Slam but Rey gets out of the hold. Rey with a tilt-a-whirl head scissors followed by the 619 and diving splash for the three count.
Winner: Rey Mysterio
We go to commercial.
We are back and we go to Big Show’s locker room and he has Hornswoggle and he is still in his blue face paint and Viking hat. Show wants to know if Hornswoggle ate all of his candy and he tells Hornswoggle that if he eats it all, he will get fat.
Kaval enters the locker room. Kaval says that he knows that Show is the captain at Bragging Rights and he says that if he is given the chance, he will contribute to the team. Show says that Kaval is new here, which Kaval acknowledges but he says that he can contribute to the team. Show tells Kaval to slow his roll. Kaval says that everyone starts off slow and he asks Show what he did in his first match. Show tells Kaval that he won the World Title. Kaval reminds us that he won Season Two of NXT and he knows that he can help.
Show says that he is looking for seasoned veterans. Kaval wants to know if Show is saying that he isn’t big enough. Show says that Kaval wouldn’t last five minutes with him. Kaval says that he thinks he can. Kaval suggests that if he lasts five minutes with Show, he should be added to Team Smackdown. Show tells Kaval that if he can last five minutes, he has earned his spot on the team.
Kaval leaves and Hornswoggle grunts and Show says that he is not a heightist.
We go to commercial.
We are back and Paul Bearer has the urn and he tells Undertaker that the time for the final reckoning is nigh. He says that he presents the instrument of his ultimate destruction. He offers Taker one last opportunity to take back the holy grail in a fight with his son, the Devil’s Favorite Demon . . . Kane. The winner will be World Champion and the loser will be buried alive. There will be a gravesite at Bragging Rights where Taker will meet his end inside a crypt.
Paul says that Taker will accept the challenge because of Taker’s pride which is his downfall. Pride made Taker vulnerable to the attack that left him in a vegetative state on Memorial Day. It was pride that led to Taker’s humiliation at the hands of Kane at Night of Champions. It was pride that allowed Paul to fool him and shatter him at the side of his son at Hell in a Cell.
Paul says that because of his pride Taker, will be beaten, broken and incapacitated, but that will be the start of it. While Taker is still breathing, he will be pitched down a filthy pit, a grave for the damned. A wormhole with room enough only for Taker to suffer. By then, Kane will scoop up the earth and shovelful by shovelful it will cover Taker’s flesh until he is buried in darkness. Paul says that Kane’s plan is almost complete. When they arrive tonight and Kane calls Taker to destiny’s door, we will see the shell of a man that Taker has become. The Devil’s Favorite Demon will tower over him. Paul says that he looks forward to that glorious moment.
We go to commercial.
We are back and Did You Know that a lot of kids participate in the Wrestlemania Reading Challenge.
Big Show is introduced and he comes to the ring. He joins the announce team for the next match.
Match Number Two: Jack Swagger with the Swagger Soaring Eagle versus Montel Vontavious Porter in a Team Smackdown Bragging Rights Qualifying Match
Porter punches Swagger and kicks him in the corner and the referee warns him. Porter with a drop toe hold and then he hits a running boot to the head and Porter gets a near fall. Porter punches Swagger but Swagger sends Porter shoulder first into the ring post. Porter sends Swagger into the turnbuckles and then Porter with a boot to the head. Porter with a clothesline or three. Porter sends Swagger into the air and then he hits the facebuster and tries for the Ballin’ Elbow. Porter hits the elbow and then he waits for Swagger to get to his feet but Swagger goes to the floor.
The Eagle gets in the way and Porter kicks the Eagle and sends him over the announce table. Swagger sends Porter into the ring post and then they return to the ring and Swagger puts Porter in the ankle lock and Porter taps.
Winner: Jack Swagger
Swagger does a few laps in the ring after the match to celebrate. Swagger then checks on the Eagle.
We go back outside and Undertaker is still standing on the roof of the building. We go to commercial.
We are back with the Make a Wish video package.
Match Number Three: Alberto Del Rio versus Chris Masters in a Bragging Rights Qualifying Match for Team Smackdown
They lock up and Del Rio backs Masters into the corner and Del Rio kicks Masters and tries for a suplex but Masters blocks it and he gives Del Rio a jackhammer for a near fall. Masters tries for the Master Lock but Del Rio gets to the ropes before it is locked in. Del Rio drops Masters’ arm on the top rope and then he kicks Masters. Del Rio works on the arm and he stomps on the elbow and gets a near fall. Del Rio with a key lock on Masters but Masters with punches. Del Rio with a knee to Masters. Masters with a Samoan drop and both men are down. Masters with clotheslines but Del Rio hits Masters in the arm. Masters with a one arm power slam and he gets a near fall. Masters tries for the Master Lock again but Del Rio with a double knee arm breaker and then he locks in the cross arm breaker and gets Masters to tap out.
Winner: Alberto Del Rio
After the match, Del Rio goes to the floor and Show offers his hand to Del Rio to thank him for being on the team. Del Rio winks at Show and refuses to shake his hand. Show is impressed with Del Rio even though he did not shake his hand.
With Big Show at the announce table, it is time for a look at Knucklehead.
Edge is walking in the back and he sees Rosa Mendes stretching as we go to commercial.
We see footage from last week when Kaitlyn interfered to help Dolph Ziggler beat Montel Vontavious Porter last week on Smackdown.
Match Number Four: Edge versus Dolph Ziggler in a Team Smackdown Qualifying Match
They lock up and Edge with a waist lock. Ziggler with a standing switch. Edge with an arm drag take down into an arm bar. Edge punches Ziggler and kicks Dolph. Edge punches Ziggler in the back and we see Vickie and Kaitlyn in the back watching on a monitor.
Edge with forearms to Ziggler followed by an Irish whip. Edge slides under Ziggler and Edge trips Ziggler. Edge sends Ziggler into the turnbuckles. Edge with a head butt but Ziggler with a forearm and he chokes Edge in the ropes. Ziggler with a snap mare and then he hits a leap frog neck snap and gets a near fall. Ziggler with a chin lock and arm bar on Edge.
They get back to their feet. Edge Irish whips Ziggler and Dolph goes to the floor. Edge with a baseball slide that takes Ziggler down. Edge sends Ziggler back into the ring and Edge takes too long to get back into the ring so Ziggler is able to recover and he kicks Edge and then hits a neck breaker on Edge as he continues to work on the surgically repaired neck. Ziggler gets a near fall on Edge and then he kicks him in the chest. Ziggler with another near fall. Ziggler with an elbow drop but Edge with punches. Edge with an Irish whip but Dolph with an elbow. Dolph goes to the turnbuckles but Edge kicks Dolph off the turnbuckles and Dolph goes to the floor. Edge tries for a spear on the floor but Dolph moves out of the way and Edge hits the ringside barrier. Dolph with a Zig Zag into the steps.
Ziggler returns to the ring and Edge is on the floor but he is able to get back into the ring before the ten count. Ziggler shows his frustration with punches and kicks to Edge as we go to commercial.
We are back and Ziggler with a reverse chin lock, arm bar, and body scissors. Edge gets back to his feet but Ziggler with elbows to the neck but he misses a splash into the corner. Edge with a flapjack and both men are down. Edge with a few clotheslines followed by a face plant for a near fall. Ziggler with a kick and he gets a sunset flip but Edge rolls through and he catapults Ziggler into the ring post. Edge with an Edge-o-Matic and he gets a near fall.
Ziggler punches Edge and then he tries for a sleeper but Edge is able to prevent Ziggler from locking it in. Edge with an Impaler DDT for a near fall. Ziggler sends Edge into the turnbuckles and Ziggler tries for another Zig Zag but Edge holds on to the ropes. Edge pulls his hair to signal that he is getting ready for the spear. Ziggler leap frogs Edge and then Ziggler goes to the turnbuckles but when he comes off the turnbuckles, Edge hits a Spear for the three count.
Winner: Edge
After the match, Big Show applauds both men’s performance from the match.
We go back outside and Undertaker is still maintaining his perch on the building to protect Portland from evil.
We go to commercial.
We are back with the Raw Rebound.
Match Number Five: Big Show versus Kaval in a Five Minute Challenge for Kaval’s shot at Team Smackdown for Bragging Rights
Show offers his hand and Kaval shakes it. Kaval with a kick to the leg but Show blocks another kick and he connects with a chop. Show with another chop in the corner. Show stands on Kaval’s back. Show picks up Kaval and then he sends him back to the mat. Show stands on Kaval. Show with a punch to the midsection and then he picks Kaval up for a slam. Kaval struggles to get up and he punches Show in the hip a few times but Show with a forearm to the back.
We are halfway through the match and Show with another chop to Kaval’s chest. Kaval pushes Show and flails to punch him. Show puts Kaval in the corner and he chops Kaval one more time. Show with a biel that sends Kaval across the ring. Show picks up Kaval and he pushes Kaval over the top rope to the floor. We are under a half minute and Show brings Kaval back into the ring. Kaval with kicks and then he drop kicks Show in the knees when Show charges into the corner. Kaval with a kick from the turnbuckles and then he takes Show down with a knee. Kaval blocks a choke slam attempt and he last the full five minutes.
Winner: Kaval
After the match, Show shakes Kaval’s hand and helps him up and raises his arm.
We go to commercial.
We are back and Kaval is still in the ring.
Tyler Reks comes out and Kaval has a shocked look on his face.
Tyler says that it is so sweet that WWE’s favorite new superstar has a spot on Team Smackdown. He says that it is a joke. Tyler says that he is the breakout superstar. He says that if anyone deserves a spot on Team Smackdown it should be him. He can beat giants and he knows that he can beat Kaval.
Teddy Long comes out and he tells Tyler that he cannot let him face Kaval after going five minutes with Big Show.
Kaval says that he doesn’t need a babysitter and if Tyler wants his spot, he will have to come in the ring and take it from him.
Teddy allows the match to happen.
Match Number Six: Tyler Reks versus Kaval in a Kaval’s spot on Team Smackdown is on the Line Match
They lock up and Reks sends Kaval into the turnbuckles. Kaval with kicks to Reks and Kaval goes to the turnbuckles. Kaval tries for the Warrior’s Way but Reks moves. Reks with a shoulder tackle and then he kicks Kaval. Reks with a Burning Hammer for the three count.
Winner: Tyler Reks
We go to commercial.
We are back with a Cody Rhodes Grooming Tip. Cody shows us photos of dirty finger nails while he talks about long, dirty, filthy, unkempt finger nails. They are a turn off for today’s modern man. Cody shows how to clip a finger nail properly without damaging your cuticles. Cody says that he uses an emery board instead of a nail file when he is done clipping his finger nails. He shows us the proper technique. He says that sometimes he adds clear nail polish and he says that nail polish isn’t just for women. It gives the nails a sparkling shine. We are now one step closer to being dashing.
Match Number Seven: Drew McIntyre versus Kofi Kingston in a Who is the Final Man on Team Smackdown at Bragging Rights Match
They lock up and Drew backs Kofi into the turnbuckles and he connects with a knee instead of a clean break. Drew with kicks to Kofi and then he sends Kofi to the mat. Kofi runs Drew into the turnbuckles and then he punches Drew until the referee pulls him out of the corner. Kofi sets for his leap onto the turnbuckles but Drew sees it coming and he gets up his boots for Kofi. Drew gets a near fall on Kofi. Drew goes to the floor and he punches Kofi. Drew suplexes Kofi onto the apron and then they return to the ring and Drew gets a near fall. Kofi holds on to the ropes and then when Drew tries for a belly-to-back suplex, Kofi counters with a lateral press and a near fall. Drew with head butts to the midsection followed by a punch. Kofi floats over Drew and then he hits Trouble in Paradise for the three count.
Winner: Kofi Kingston
We see the participants of Team Smackdown.
Undertaker has decided to enter the Rose Garden and we see him walking as we go to commercial.
We are back and Kane and Paul Bearer make their way to the ring.
Kane says that facts leave no room for arguments. Everyone hopes that his brother is more determined, more powerful, and more evil than ever. However, the facts are that he is a despondent, dejected, former shell of himself. The fact is that he is superior to his brother. The fact is that he is superior to everyone. The only thing that anyone has ever succeeded at is their relentless quest for mediocrity. They fail at everything else, just like his brother has failed to reclaim the World Title. First he failed in a No Holds Barred Match, then he failed at Hell in a Cell, and then he will fail at Bragging Rights. Kane says that everyone tries to use Undertaker to escape from their failed existences, their dead end jobs, their unattainable dreams, and their rudderless lives. Kane says that he forces everyone to face reality and there is no escape. Kane says that everyone would salivate at the opportunity to see the Dead Man destroy the Devil’s Favorite Demon. Deep down, they all know that it is never going to happen. If there is anyone watching who still believes that the Undertaker . . . the Phenom, can do anything to stop him, their hopes are going to be buried alive, just like his brother.
Paul approves his son’s comments once Kane is done.
The crowd chants for the Undertaker and then the gong goes off and the lights go out.
Undertaker’s pyro goes off and he makes his way to the ring.
Taker and Kane stand face to face in the center of the ring. Taker looks at Paul Bearer and the urn and then back to Kane. Taker kicks and punches Kane as Paul gets out of the ring. Taker with punches and kicks in the corner and then he connects with an uppercut. Taker with jabs and kicks and Kane gets to the floor.
Undertaker summons the fire from the ring posts as Kane and Paul Bearer retreat to the stage. Taker sets off pyro on the stage in front of Kane and Paul Bearer and both men are in shock.
Taker poses in the ring and we go to credits.
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