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We are live from Wilkes-Barre, Pennsylvania and your announcers are Michael ‘People Power’ Cole, Booker ‘Where is Michael Rooker’ T, and Josh ‘What about that Kidd/Cesaro match from Smackdown’ Mathews.
Michael Cole wonders if Sheamus will apologize to John Laurinaitis for almost knocking John over on Raw.
Lillian Garcia introduces Eve and in a bit of a shocker, it is Eve who makes her way to the ring.
Eve looks around and she remembers that she has something to say. She points out that John Laurinaitis is still the general manager of Raw and Smackdown after pinning John Cena on Sunday night. Due to an international WWE business trip, John is not here tonight.
She says that John has left her in charge. Her boss will deal with John Cena on Monday night, but tonight she is going to deal with Sheamus. Two things will happen tonight. Sheamus will issue a public apology for bumping into an injured John Laurinaitis on Monday night. Eve says that she will name Sheamus’ opponent for No Way Out.
Alberto Del Rio’s music interrupts Eve and he makes his way into the building in the non-traditional way, on foot. Alberto sucks up to Eve to try to convince her to give him the title match. He says that she is not only beautiful, but she is smart. She says that there is no one better than Alberto Del Rio to face Sheamus. He says that Eve knows this. Alberto makes it to the ring and he says that after what happened to him and his quest for the World Title has been horrible.
He says that Eve is perfect and she needs to think if she wants to make John Laurinaitis proud. She can do that by making Alberto the number one contender.
Eve says that Alberto makes a compelling case and there is no one more deserving . . .
Randy Orton appears to have issue with what Eve might say about Alberto Del Rio so he makes his way to the ring.
Orton tells Eve that she is new to the job so he wants to introduce himself to her. He says that she has a big decision to make on her hands so he suggests that the people help her out. Orton asks the wonderful people if they want to see Alberto Del Rio (lots of boos) or would they like to see him (lots of cheering). In the name of People Power, Randy thinks we have an answer.
Apparently Kane is not an advocate of People Power because he makes his way to the ring.
Kane says that neither of these men have the qualifications that he does. That pasty white Irish ghost should have to face the Devil’s Favorite Demon. In case she needs any more convincing, this week’s Smackdown is episode 666.
Eve says that there is only one way to settle this. The person who will face Sheamus is going to be the winner of tonight’s Triple Threat Match.
In case you missed the photos from earlier in the week, we see photos of Christian winning the battle royal at the start of Over the Limit and Christian’s victory over Cody Rhodes to become Intercontinental Champion.
Match Number One: Christian versus Hunico with Camacho
They lock up and Hunico with a side head lock but Christian with a running forearm. Hunico talks some strategy with Camacho and he punches Christian and chops him against the ropes. Christian with a back body drop and Hunico rolls to the floor to regroup.
Christian misses a baseball slide and then he follows Hunico around the ring. Camacho distracts Christian and Hunico attacks Christian from behind. Hunico returns to the ring and he hits a suicide dive and then he gets a near fall when they return to the ring. Hunico with a slam and he tries for a springboard senton splash but he barely hits Christian. Christian with a flapjack.
Christian with a punch and running forearm. Christian goes to the turnbuckles for a missile drop kick but Hunico catches him and tries for a jackknife cover. Christian with a near fall of his own followed by a punch. Christian with a back elbow off the turnbuckles and then he sets for the Killswitch but Camacho gets on the apron. Christian with a drop kick to Camacho.
Hunico tries for the spinning Olympic Slam but Christian hits the Killswitch and then he goes up top for the frog splash and hits it to get the three count.
Winner: Christian
After the match, Cody Rhodes’ music plays and he makes his way to the stage.
Cody tells Christian that over 8 months and 257 days, he spent his time wiping the dirt off that title to restore it to the pinnacle of its prominence because it was held by jokes like Santino Marella. He made it mean what it meant when it was held by greats like Razor Ramon, Randy Savage, and Shawn Michaels. In one night, Christian ruined it and threw it all away. No one cares about that title because no one cares about Christian.
Cody says that it won’t take eight months to rectify that. When he gets his rematch, it will only take three seconds.
Christian lays the title belt in the center of the ring to challenge Cody but Cody leaves.
We go to commercial.
We are back and we see a confrontation between the Usos and the team of Titus O’Neil and Darren Young where they make fun of each other.
Match Number Two: The Usos versus Darren Young and Titus O’Neil
Titus and Jey start things off and Jey goes after Darren on the apron before punching Titus. Jey with an uppercut and then Jimmy tags in. They hit a double head butt and then Jey is tagged in again and he hits a running forearm into the corner. Titus punches Jimmy on the apron and Young with a kick to the back.
Jey with a punch to Young to knock him off the apron but Titus with a boot to Jey. Young tags in and Young is sent onto Jey by Titus on a gourdbuster and Young gets a near fall. Young with a kick and a swinging neck breaker. Jey is sent into Titus’ boot and he tags back in. Titus with kicks to Jey. Darren tags back in and he kicks Jey and Irish whips him but Jey with a boot to Darren when he charges into the corner.
Jimmy tags in and he hits a clothesline and then he goes after Titus on the apron. Jimmy with another clothesline and back heel kick. Jimmy with a Samoan drop and then he hits the running butt splash on Darren but Titus breaks up the cover. Titus sends Jey to the floor but Jey pulls Titus out.
Jimmy with a super kick and then Jimmy goes up top. Titus gets on the apron but he distracts Jimmy long enough to allow Darren to crotch Jimmy on top. Titus tags in and hits a back breaker followed by the Demolition Decapitation for the three count.
Winners: Titus O’Neil and Darren Young
We go to commercial.
We are back and in seven days, so will Sin Cara.
Match Number Three: Brian Edwards and Kevin Bendl versus Ryback
Before the match, Brian gets on the mic and he insults the people of Wilkes-Barre. Kevin takes the mic and he says that Ryback may have beaten two people in a match before, but never at the same time.
Edwards and Bendl figure out which one gets killed first and it is going to be Kevin who gets sent into the corner. Ryback with a boot to Brian. Ryback gets Edwards up for a power bomb but he swings him around to knock Bendl into the corner again. Ryback with a power bomb to Edwards and then he hits a spinebuster on Bendl followed by a power bomb. Ryback with a lariat to Edwards and then it is time for Bendl to feel the muscle buster, but he sees Edwards on the mat so he gets both of them up and hits the muscle buster and pins them both.
Winner: Ryback
After the match, Ryback demands to be fed.
Santino Marella and Ricardo Rodriguez walk in split screen as we go to commercial.
We are back with footage from Monday night when Santino gave Ricardo the cobra.
Ricardo introduces himself as he makes his way to the ring.
Match Number Four: Santino Marella versus Ricardo Rodriguez
Santino with a side head lock and shoulder tackle. They criss cross until Santino stops to watch Ricardo run the ropes until he cannot run any more. Santino checks on Ricardo’s pulse before applying an airplane spin. Ricardo falls to the mat and so does Santino as he goes to the floor.
Santino hides under the ring and Ricardo thinks he is going to come out the other side but Santino comes out the same side he entered and Santino puts on his hand puppet. Santino tries to get Ricardo’s attention but it fails. Ricardo turns around into the Cobra and Santino gets the three count.
Winner: Santino Marella
We go to commercial.
We are back and Sheamus makes his way to the ring. Sheamus asks if he can be serious for a minute. Sheamus says that he has been brought out to apologize to John Laurinaitis. In his retrospect, when an accident happens, you shouldn’t have to apologize for it. Sheamus says that he was running to the ring and John got in the way. It was an accident. There are some people who say that he did it on purpose.
If that is true, it was accidentally on purpose. Sheamus goes with his apology. Sheamus says that he would like to apologize . . . He would like to apologize . . . He would like to apologize for John Laurinaitis being a massive arse. While we talk about Johnny’s arse, you will find his two assistants so far up there, they could probably tell us what he had for breakfast. He wants to apologize for everyone else who kisses his arse. He mentions the seven foot four hundred forty pound arse kisser.
Sheamus turns his attention to his match at No Way Out. If he had his way, he would be facing the Viper, Randy Orton.
Vickie Guerrero interrupts and throws out a few excuse mes. Vickie tells Sheamus that her good friend Eve told her that Sheamus is going to face an opponent right now. That opponent is a former World Champion and an All American American.
Match Number Five: Sheamus versus Jack Swagger with Vickie Guerrero
They lock up and they go around the ring. Swagger with a waist lock take down on Sheamus but Sheamus with elbows to the head to get out of the hold. Sheamus runs into a boot but Swagger misses a dive at the knee when Sheamus moves out of the way. Swagger with a knee and punches to the head. Sheamus with punches of his own and a shoulder tackle.
Sheamus goes up top for the flying shoulder tackle and he hits it. Sheamus gets a near fall. Swagger rolls to the floor and he wants to regroup. Sheamus with a clothesline on the floor and then he punches Swagger before sending him back into the ring.
Vickie gets on the apron to distract Sheamus and Swagger with a dive to the leg and Sheamus holds his leg on the floor as we go to commercial.
We are back and Swagger with kicks to the injured ankle to get ready for the ankle lock. Sheamus with punches to Swagger. Swagger with elbows to the head and he sends Sheamus shoulder first into the turnbuckles. Swagger sends Sheamus’ leg into the ring post. Swagger tries to hyper extend the knee and then he turns it into a step over toe hold.
Sheamus kicks Swagger away but Sheamus struggles to keep him balance. Swagger with a splash into the corner followed by Panic Attack. Swagger puts Sheamus’ leg in the ropes to add extra pressure on the ankle.
Swagger misses a boot to the leg and Sheamus with a neck breaker and both men are down. Sheamus with a double sledge or three to Swagger. Sheamus tries for the power slam but Swagger avoids the hold. Sheamus sends Swagger to the apron and it is time for the forearms across the chest.
Sheamus with a suplex back into the ring and Sheamus gets a near fall. Sheamus gets Swagger on his shoulders for the fireman’s carry slam but Swagger counters with a sunset flip. Sheamus misses a Brogue Kick and Swagger with a dive to the knee. Swagger hits the Swagger Bomb but he can only get a two count.
Swagger gets to his feet first and he sets for the Doctor Bomb but Sheamus escapes and hits the Brogue Kick for the three count.
Winner: Sheamus
We go to commercial.
We are back and Yoshi Tatsu is in the ring. Do you remember what happened last week when Damien Sandow called him an unworthy opponent? We have the footage.
Damien Sandow comes out and he has something to say before his match. He introduces himself and he says that he is here to help all of us. Last week, the intellectual savior was faced with a conundrum. Subject the unwashed masses of the WWE Universe to a match between him and an unworthy opponent that would only further serve the people further into their own self imposed ignorance. He could do the honorable thing and abstain from such mockery so they can continue to place him on the pedestal of enlightenment that everyone clamors for.
Damien asks for everyone to be silent while he is speaking. However, he chose to depart without incident. Then he was accosted verbally by the sophomoric bantering of the ignoramus who stands before him tonight. The aforementioned dunce did not comprehend what Damien was teaching him. He will impart his lesson physically. He is not doing this just for his opponent. He is doing this for the welfare and common good of everyone. He tells everyone that they are welcome.
Match Number Six: Damien Sandow versus Yoshi Tatsu
Yoshi charges into the corner but Damien retreats to the ropes and he tells the referee to do his job. Sandow with a series of knees followed by a side Russian leg sweep. Sandow with a Japanese neck breaker for the three count.
Winner: Damien Sandow
After the match, Sandow does a victory cartwheel.
We see footage from Ryback’s win over two men earlier tonight.
We go to commercial.
We are back and it is time to hear from the Big Show since he probably didn’t get to say everything on Monday night when he had the chance.
Big Show looks around for a moment before sitting down in the center of the ring. Show says that on the Monday before Over the Limit, he was fired. Show says that he has never been fired before so he was willing to beg for his job. Show says that a lot of people in the crowd know what it is like to be fired, but when they got fired, it was just a job they lost, it wasn’t something that they loved.
He says that he is a seven foot tall giant who loves dominating people. He says that he felt betrayed by all of his so called friends in and out of the ring. He felt betrayed by everyone in the crowd. Not one person in the locker room, not one member of the production or technical crew came to his defense. After all of the years and all of the things that he has done, that is what he gets?
Show responds to the ‘You Sold Out’ chant and he says that he did not sell out. Show says that after everything that he had done for the people, this is the thanks that he gets. At that very moment he realized that he has no friends. He realized that he is alone in this world. Show says that he got the call.
Show asks when you are drowning, do you really care where the lifeline is coming from? The fans chant ‘Cena’ and Show says that he made a deal. If he helped John Laurinaitis defeat John Cena, he got his life back. He got a new contract and a big fat bonus. All Laurinaitis had to do was escape from John Cena and it was set. He was going to drag Laurinaitis back to the ring like he wanted revenge. It was all a ruse for John Cena. When he threw Laurinaitis to Cena, he knew what was going to happen next.
With one punch, he knocked John Cena out cold. He watched Laurinaitis pin John Cena for the 1-2-3. At No Way Out, he is going to do it again. He understands that the people really never cared about him.
Show says that he damn sure doesn’t care about the people.
Show leaves the ring and Kane’s pyro plays since it is time for the main event.
Kane makes his way to the ring but from out of nowhere, Daniel Bryan enters the ring with a chair and he attacks Kane with repeated shots to the body. Bryan is finally restrained by officials as Bryan yeses his way to the back.
Match Number Seven: Kane versus Randy Orton versus Alberto Del Rio in a Number One Contender Match
Before the match starts, Kane tries to shake off the attack by Bryan.
Orton with a kick and punches to Del Rio followed by punches to Kane. Del Rio kicks Orton and Orton sends Del Rio to the floor. Kane with a boot to Orton but Kane still feels the damage from the chair attack. Kane with a drop kick to Orton for a near fall. Kane with an Irish whip and splash into the corner. He tries again and Orton with a boot and then he this a back breaker but Del Rio breaks up the cover.
Del Rio punches Orton and then Kane with an uppercut to Del Rio. Orton clotheslines Del Rio over the top rope to the floor and then Kane clotheslines Orton over the top rope to the floor. Kane goes after Orton and then Del Rio. Orton sends Kane and Del Rio head first into the ringside barrier. Orton sends Kane’s head into the announce table.
Orton rolls back into the ring and he sets for the IEDDT on Kane but Del Rio with an enzuigiri and all three men are down as we go to commercial.
We are back and Kane with kicks ot Del Rio. Kane with an uppercut to Orton and he gets a near fall on Orton. Kane with a slam and then he hits an elbow drop for another near fall on Orton. Kane punches Del Rio but Del Rio wit a kick to the back and he sends Kane into the turnbuckles. Del Rio with a step up enzuigiri on Kane. Del Rio with kicks to Orton in the corner.
Orton sends Del Rio to the apron and Orton with a drop kick. Kane with an Irish whip and side slam for a near fall. Kane goes up top for the flying clothesline but Del Rio with a step up enzuigiri and Kane goes to the floor. Del Rio with a boot to Orton followed by punches. Del Rio misses a running boot and Orton with punches.
Orton with a kick and two clotheslines. Kane tries for a clothesline on Orton but Orton ducks it and then Orton hits a power slam on Kane. Orton gives one to Del Rio so he does not feel left out. Orton with a clothesline that sends Kane over the top rope to the floor. Orton with a clothesline in the corner followed by punches.
Orton punches Del Rio on the turnbuckles and Orton with an IEDDT. Orton looks around and sets for the RKO with the twist. Orton punches the mat but Del Rio pushes Orton away. Kane pulls Orton to the floor. Kane Irish whips Orton into the ring steps. Kane drops Del Rio on the top rope.
Kane goes up top but he misses the leaping clothesline. Del Rio with a kick and then he tries to float over into the cross arm breaker but Kane avoids it and he hits the choke slam on Del Rio. Daniel Bryan comes to the ring and Kane does not know whether to try to win the match or go after Bryan. Kane leaves the ring and then he realizes what is going on. Kane gets back on the apron and Bryan makes his way back down the ramp.
Kane freezes on the apron and then Orton hits an RKO on Kane. Orton makes the cover but Del Rio with a running boot to break up the cover. Del Rio gets the three count on Kane.
Winner: Alberto Del Rio
Alberto celebrates on the stage but Sheamus with a running double sledge to the back of Del Rio. Sheamus tells Del Rio that he cannot wait to kick his head off at No Way Out.
We go to credits.
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